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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate living in Manchester (and North in general)

928 replies

ILikeMilk · 11/01/2011 13:16

Moved here four years ago to be with DH, and I still cannot get used to it. We are in a nicest area of Manchester, and it is still feels very provincial and boring. I dream about living in London, but DH does not want to look for a new job. I feel like there is no point and don?t want to decorate the house, make friends, etc, I just fantasise about being in London every single day. There is not much to do here, no nice streets or galleries, not much to do on the weekends as a family. I went to London this weekend, it was so painful to come back. Does anybody else feel this way?

OP posts:
MrsGravy · 11/01/2011 13:53

I used to live in manchester and loved it (moved back to south wales to be near family). Surely you didnt really expect it to have as many attractions, shops etc as london? Whilst I agree with the posters who say there is plenty to do there, it's a smaller city and will obviously have less of that kind of thing. But it has its own strengths, things that london cant compete with, better cost of living, easier to get around the whole city due to its smaller size and there are some brilliant days out in easy reach - you can get to the lake district, the peak district, the north wales coast line etc. Why did you move in the first place? Oh and what makes you think hale is the nicest bit?! The crazy house prices?

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 11/01/2011 13:53

Well, I guess I am in a minority here.

OP posts:
ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 11/01/2011 13:53

The kids are already bored because they have you as a mother ILikeMilk

pleasechange · 11/01/2011 13:54

lol at dull, grey and dirty. It must be quite difficult for your DCs to have a good time if you're feeling (and presumably therefore looking) miserable all the time

Mrsmackie · 11/01/2011 13:54

Dull, grey and dirty - how rude are you!

Ephiny · 11/01/2011 13:54

I'd happily swap with you - I live in London now and hate it. Manchester was a fantastic place to live, affordable enough that normal (i.e. not super-rich) people can live in a nice area, small enough to walk almost everywhere or a short bus-ride, lots of interesting stuff going on, and best of all only a short drive or train ride until you're out of the city and in the beautiful Pennine countryside - Peak District on your doorstep, Lake District, Yorkshire Dales and North Wales all easily accessible. It's quite a trek to get to anywhere remotely nice from London :(

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 11/01/2011 13:54

Apocalypse, are you suggesting I am a bad mother just because I dont feel at home in Manchester?

OP posts:
corns1lky · 11/01/2011 13:55

Why do you need so may places to go? Maybe I'm just lazy. Hmm

pleasechange · 11/01/2011 13:55

That's a good questions from MrsGravy - I assume like most other people, the OP was attracted my middle-classness/expensive houses/air of affluence. That does not an interesting life make

bupcakesandcunting · 11/01/2011 13:56

It's not because you don't feel at home, it's because your negative vibes are being passed on to your children. I don't fel at home where I am but my DS would never know. I've tried to make the best of things. You're just putting obstacles in the way of every suggestion. I am convinced you're a WUM actually...

Lizzylou · 11/01/2011 13:56

Hmm, where to start?

I could point out all that Manchester has to offer, but I have a feeling that Op would just continue moaning about it anyway.

You just sound joyless and pessimistic, and yes, like a stroppy whiney teen.

There is so much in around Manchester. Are you a member of the National Trust? There are loads of great places around Manchester.
Our boys love Styal Mill.

I do agree about Hale, it's not a shithole, just full of pretentious people imo (disclaimer: those I've met anyway Wink)

AgentZigzag · 11/01/2011 13:56

'There is more to life than wandering around looking at paintings dear....'

Grin charliesmommy - classic

(you're not the Queen are you??)

valiumredhead · 11/01/2011 13:56

Manchester is duller and greyer than London? Seriously?

corns1lky · 11/01/2011 13:56

how old are your kids? what do their friends do?

SoLongAsItsHealthy · 11/01/2011 13:56

YABU. You are very lucky to live somewhere as lovely as Hale. Sure, Manchester city centre doesn't compare to London in terms of culture but the suburbs are a million times nicer than anywhere you'll get in London.

Have you looked at moving to somewhere like Didsbury? It's a fab little village with a very cosmopolitan feel and realy lively and leafy as can be. There was once an article in The Times referring to it as "The Hampstead of the North". My friend's mum cut it out and pinned it on the fridge!

If you're so in love with London then clearly you shoudl move back. But I don't think you're giving Manchester a fair go.

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 11/01/2011 13:57

Allnew, I moved to DH's house, was not my choice of area really.

OP posts:
LaWeaselMys · 11/01/2011 13:57

Well somebody doesn't know how lucky they are (hint OP - it's you)

corns1lky · 11/01/2011 13:57

There's a tate in Lpool as well BTW

bupcakesandcunting · 11/01/2011 13:58

nagy I'm only from Worcestershire but I'm in the good old Black Countray now! Where abouts are you?

PolythenePam · 11/01/2011 13:58

I think she's trying to put over that your defeatest attitude will be rubbing off on the kids. What about parks, city farms, the theatre, skate parks, theme swimming pools, local country parks, galleries, go karting, pony trekking....the list of things to do with your kids in and around any city is endless!

But oh no - let's all be bored because we live near Manchester. Woopie doo for mum.

pleasechange · 11/01/2011 13:58

I was thinking that too corns1lky. We only ever really need to resort to museums/galleries when it's either p*ssing it down or something. Don't really understand how someone can have been to each of these so many times that they are bored of them/know all the pictures. It does sound like the OP doesn't spend any time outdoors?

We spend most of our free time outside doing stuff, and don't have any time to feel bored. I'd rather live in my home country, yes, but that doesn't mean that anywhere else is boring. Don't they say that if you're constantly bored it means your boring?

bupcakesandcunting · 11/01/2011 13:59

She doesn't like the Liverpool Tate, corns1lky. Probably because it's not within the M25 circle.

LadyBlaBlah · 11/01/2011 13:59

You haven't clarified whether you have made any Hale mummy friends?

GetOrfMoiLand · 11/01/2011 13:59

Christ OP, if you cried at the sight of Stockport, you should try living in Gloucester. Seriously.

I love Manchester, I plan to move the hell out of Gloucester as soon as dd is 18, and am moving oop north.

Seriously, are you that wedded to art galleries? You know every painting in the Lowry off by heart? God you must be a strange sight, wondering round art galleries looking all folorn like a Bronte character.

Are you just bored? Why don't you get a job or something, or go to an art course and paint your own pictures.

Or - plan to move to London, or Bristol. If you really hate it, do something about it. If not, get on with and stop blathering on about nowt.

Bunbaker · 11/01/2011 13:59

You can be anonymous in any big city, not just London.

How old are the children? Don't you get any opportunity to meet other parents at toddler groups/the school gates etc?

I am from the London area myself and have had no problem making new friends, especially since DD was born. I have friends from work, from church, from toddler group, from school. No-one cares if I say grarse instead of grass or bus instead of booss, but they would mind if I kept saying that London was the centre of the universe and anything or anyone outside it was boring and provincial.