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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate living in Manchester (and North in general)

928 replies

ILikeMilk · 11/01/2011 13:16

Moved here four years ago to be with DH, and I still cannot get used to it. We are in a nicest area of Manchester, and it is still feels very provincial and boring. I dream about living in London, but DH does not want to look for a new job. I feel like there is no point and don?t want to decorate the house, make friends, etc, I just fantasise about being in London every single day. There is not much to do here, no nice streets or galleries, not much to do on the weekends as a family. I went to London this weekend, it was so painful to come back. Does anybody else feel this way?

OP posts:
ILikeyourHairyHands · 09/02/2017 17:07

Yes, there's nothing to aspire to in Manchester. NOTHING.

Binkybix · 09/02/2017 17:18

I live in London but am jealous of all the countryside you northern city dwellers get on your doorstep. I'd like to try it but am too much of a wuss. And I do love London for the most part. Smile

DoraDunn · 09/02/2017 17:40

I'm from the pretty Herts cathedral town where everyone commutes to London. I hated living there even though DH loved it and it was an easy commute. We then tried other commuter areas such as Guildford and Berkhamsted and I hated those too. We moved up to Manchester with DH's job and I loved it. It felt like home to me despite being Home Counties born and bred. I was gutted when work meant we had to move down south again although we compromised on going right down south near the coast. DH's suggestions were Wokingham or Harpenden. Hmm

I've lived in London too albeit just for 1yr as a student and it was ok but not somewhere I'd want to live long term or with children. I just couldn't settle. But Manchester seemed like a smaller more contained more accessible version of London and I loved it.
No chance of ever moving back up though. Sad Maybe when we retire! Smile

ChequeredPasta · 09/02/2017 18:05

Only read the first three pages, but the OP seems surprisingly, um, not well spoken for someone claiming to be so posh.
I call wind up.

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 09/02/2017 18:08

Hmm where did I claim to be posh?

OP posts:
EatSpamAmandaLamb · 09/02/2017 18:55

Oh no my poor children went to school for a time in Manchester. I've snatched them away but will they be able to aspire to anything living outside of the M25.
I know different people crave different environments but OP you are rather hasty to write off an entire city because you were bored when you lived on the outskirts of a suburb. Could you name 3 exhibitions you attended in your 4 years?
You clearly weren't mixing with the right people of you didn't feel a buzz in Manchester. It is home to some of the most creative minds in the country.
You are a total snob and have written off huge swathes of a county because of it.
Whereabouts in the EU are you from?

DoraDunn · 09/02/2017 18:55

But then I really can't stand milk either, makes my feel queasy so each to their own! Grin

EatSpamAmandaLamb · 09/02/2017 18:57

Yes I think I would come up with a sudden dairy allergy around OP.

kel1234 · 09/02/2017 19:04

Liverbird, was your comment meant for me. If so then yes 100%. Cousin be happier to be back here. I sat on the train literally smiling the whole way when we were coming back.

coldcanary · 09/02/2017 19:13

Maybe there was no feeling of adventure because you didn't want there to be. I've lived 17 miles north of Manchester for 40 years. Travelled a lot and love visiting London almost more than anywhere else in the country. It's a beautiful vibrant place. But so is Manchester and the surrounding area, you just didn't want to look in case you found something you liked.
Manchester also has utterly poverty ridden shit holes but so does London. You only saw the bad of up here because that's what you wanted to see in order to justify your insistence on moving back south.
That's fine though, just don't denigrate Manchester and its people and imply that there's nothing to aspire to in order to justify yourself.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 09/02/2017 19:17

OP, you have 2 very good galleries in Hale, Clark Art and Gateway. Go and talk to the directors and they will introduce you to the Northern art school, which is fascinating and has lots of links with the London scene via Sickert and the Camberwell Group etc. Then you have the `Lowry in Salford, Manchester Art Gallery and the Whitworth.

Of all the things you may miss about London, art should not be one of them....

niccyb · 09/02/2017 19:27

There are lots of nice places to visit if you look. You have national trust parks on your door stop such as tatton park which is lovely in summer. There are art galleries in central Manchester also. You are only 2 hours from the Peak District, 2 hours from the Lake District.
Hale is a nice area and footballers have houses in the area. Is it your friends and family that you miss that is causing the void?
It sounds like you are home sick for London and it may better to move back to London as you may need to be near your family x

Summerisdone · 09/02/2017 19:38

YABU there is lots for you to do in Manchester and surrounding areas. If you're in Hale then you're actually in a perfect place; a stroll into altrincham where you can jump on met to city centre and there is plenty to do there, but also you are just a drive or short train journey away from plenty of fantastic places to visit in Cheshire too. It seems to me that maybe you have never really allowed yourself to enjoy living where you do and therefore have put a mental block on the place. Why don't you look online for places or activities that interest you and I'm sure you will find somewhere close by

Lelloteddy · 09/02/2017 19:44

Could be worse OP. You could have ended up in Stoke.

Glad you've escaped to London.

Ps Zombie thread folks Grin

Harree · 09/02/2017 19:51

OP, glad you're happy now you've moved back down south. I agree that Hale is one of the nicest areas in Manchester & am intrigued to know whereabouts in Hale that you lived. (I am trying to buy in Hale at the moment & there's a shortage of houses in a certain price range) Your previous house may now be worth a fortune! And I am nosey

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 09/02/2017 20:01

Harree it would be too identifying. We had sold our house a few years after moving away because it got burglared. We used to come and stay there when visiting DH's parents up North.

OP posts:
Monsterpage · 09/02/2017 20:03

I've read some twaddle on Mumsnet but I've never seen such idiocy from a rude, unsophisticated, philistine. If you are so incapable of seeing the vast amounts of things to do in the Manchester area and surrounds then maybe it's good that you and your OH have been fleeced for a poxy property in London where you can see a bit of field!! i lived in London for 20 years and moved up north 2 years ago. Better schools, access to cities and the countryside and a huge number of cultural activities. Regardless of where you live rude is rude. And you ilikemilk are rude!!

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 09/02/2017 20:05

With all due respect I have to disagree about schools. Schools in Trafford area are excellent, but there are some very very good schools in London.

OP posts:
Msqueen33 · 09/02/2017 20:10

@Sociallyawkwardd describing the whole of the north as a shit tip is a bit harsh. Have you been to every bit of the north. I'm not a northerner but lived up there for a long time and yes some areas aren't great but that's the same as down south.

DoraDunn · 09/02/2017 20:18

We found the schools up there better than any of the areas we lived in in the Home Counties and on the whole better than they are here in W Sussex but schools in London have improved massively in recent years. But in Trafford you have access to some of the highest performing schools in the country.

EatSpamAmandaLamb · 09/02/2017 20:37

You haven't answered my questions.

Badhairday1001 · 09/02/2017 20:45

I love living in Liverpool. I've lived in different parts of the country and enjoyed it but this is my favourite place and it's home. Maybe working would help, you would make friends and feel like you are part of something and also you would find out from colleagues what they do at weekends etc.

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 09/02/2017 20:47

Eat Spam, you are quite rude and I am not sure why I am answering, but anyway. You seriously want me to remember what I had attended 4 years ago in Manchester? I could probaby look on my flikr to refresh my memory but that would be too much effort.
I don't want to say which EU country I am from. I was the only parent from another EU country in DC1 school. It would be too identifying.

OP posts:
moongirl123 · 09/02/2017 20:47

I could have written what OP wrote a few years ago but now I am happier after working FT and met some great people with great banter. OP, you need a purpose. Don't just stay at home and resent everything. What's the point?

Original poster
ILikeMilk · 09/02/2017 20:50

I think my problem was that I was born and grew up in a capital city. Lived in other buzzing trendy cities all over the world. I had never lived in suburbia before moving to Hale. I tried it and now I know it is 100% not for me.

OP posts: