to want people to rsvp in response to my dd's birthday invite

[santascupcakes]

I have had 2 responses out of 35 and party is friday!!

Is it common not to RSVP these days or can I only expect 2 people to show up.

I am having to try and catch parents in between after school clubs and work just to find out if they are coming so I can do the food.

I did only send them out on the 4th and did specify RSVP with mobile and home number.

Should I cater for at least 20?

How awful if just 2 people turned up

santascupcakes-this is a bug bear of mine too! When we had dds party I specified on invite rsvp. I had 2 mums who told me they were coming,1 phoned and had 2 who just didnt turn up(even though they are neighbours and could easily have just knocked at the door).I was annoyed by this. Personally think it is bad manners. I wouldnt fret about only 2 replies though-I am sure loads will turn up.

Oh I get this too - DD party on Sat and less than half have bothered to reply. Really rude IMO. I am going to have to ring round individually to find out final numbers. What is it with people?

It's very common but very annoying I grant you. NU.

I usually write on 'really hope you can come, can you let me know by X date' although I have to round up a few stragglers. I think it's worse for whole-class parties, as everyone thinks everyone else is going and they will just see at the time, smaller parties with a few selected guests seem a bit better.

In my experience (and from the many threads I have seen on here about the same thing) people who RSVP to party invitations are definitely in the minority. I can't recall how many times I had to make enough party bags and food for all the children who had been invited, knowing full well that some just wouldn't turn up, and the stuff would be wasted.

It's not as if it is difficult to pick up the phone and tell someone your child is or is not attending the party.

It is worth remembering, though, that sometimes children will tell the child whose party it is whether or not they are coming, and that information doesn't always get passed on accurately.

A close friend of mine invited all of the girls from her dd1's class to her party, and only 1 turned up - and most of those who didn't, hadn't bothered to RSVP. Her dd1 was gutted.

I don't think it makes a difference if you do specify RSVP - some people honestly forget (or are disorganised/stressed/don't know if they are coming or going with all their dc's activities), some are too lazy, and some are waiting in case they have a better offer!

We do "regrets only". That way you can plan for the amount sent out excluding those who may ring to say can't come. Everyone usually does come.
I'm sure the party will be great!

Someone on another party thread suggested writing "no R.S.V.P, no party bag" on the invite.

I think I will try that when the time comes.

Someone also suggested sending out an invitation that gave the date and time for the party, but not the location, stating that the location would be given when a parent RSVP'd - at least that way you'd know how many children were coming!

Woopsidaisy - I have had people who didn't attend and didn't bother to ring and tell me they weren't coming either.

Oooh even better SDTG...

I think it's so rude not to simply phone and say yes or no

I always ask for replies by a certain date. I think it's harder this time of year though just after Christmas and start of a new term, no one seems organised!

YANBU. This is one of my bug-bears. I hate chasing people in the playground but you do need to know numbers. It is horrible.

But, DS had an invitation just before Christmas and I was ill that week. I have just realised that I've not responded. Party is in two weeks. I feel awful and have just been grovelling to the mum.

I was also a bit upset that after DS;s birthday party I only got one thank you. I make a point of texting to say thank you as I know how stressful these things can be.

I think it is a lack of manners TBH.