to be so cross with my Grandma??

[LittleBeaut]

Ladies something has been on my mind now for over a week and I dont know if I'm being unreasonable or just hormonal.

My Grandma broke her ankle about 2 weeks ago and has been moaning ever since that the home helps are no help really (apparently there not allowed to wash up anymore for health and safely????) and all she has been eating is ready meals that they shove in the microwave. Now dont get me wrong my Grandma isnt and never has been the best of cooks... I stew is probably the best she does anyway so last Thursday me and my two boys were driving back from a little mini break mum had got us for Christmas and I decided I would go, get all the ingredients for spag bol and go straight there and cook for her (easily saved/frozed then). Well first off when I walked in the zimmer frame was in the kitchen and she was in the living room... so she is obviously walking about without it. And when I told her she snapped at me saying she had me a shopping list and its just great that I didnt even phone to see what see wanted. My intention had always been to get the spag bol on and go get any shopping she needed while it was cooking. She then went on to tell me she had been in and made herself a stew, I said I would do the bol anyhow because it would freeze etc. So in I went, stood, peeled, chopped and cooked the bol sauce... left it simmering while I went to do her shopping as she had her list all ready (she didnt even know I was going). When I came back the pan had been switched off so when I asked her why the pan had been turned off she said "It looked cooked to me" I had onloy been gone 10/15 minutes so there is no way the mince was cooked. So I put it back on telling her that steak mince which I got took alot longer to cook that the cheap sh*tty mince... which she said she didnt agree with but I was cooking so cooking my way is what I was going to do. So in the end by the time I had finished the sgag bol and given some to the boys she then decided she wanted that instead of the stew she'd made herself

Sure its just my pregnant hormones getting to me... but I needed to vent. I'm very new to this site so if I've done anything wrong please let me know. Thanks xx

[DMCWelshCakes]

Sounds exactly like my grandmother. The longer I spend with her the more similarities I notice between her & 2 year old DiddyDragon. She's incredibly demanding, throws tantrums when she doesn't get her own way, has no concept of other people's needs/priorities and is completely self-obsessed.

She's not yet 88 so could be around for a long while yet. (We tend to live for a LONG time in our family.) We try to help as much as we can, but frankly patience is wearing thin.

Last time she was in hospital (turned out to be nothing wrong other than a panic attack) the doctor took us to one side to explain the concept of geriatric attention seeking disorder. Apparently it's extremely common.

[Punkatheart]

I can absolutely understand how you feel. I have been visiting an elderly lady for about two years. Thing have got gradually worse for her, after several falls. So I have had to organise carers, social services etc. Then she starts to turn on people...absolutely the frustation that probably your grandmother shows at her part loss of independence and control. My elderly friend has now turned on me very aggressively - complicated by the fact that I think she is showing signs of dementia. But your grandmother is simply showing the frustrations of old age.

Vent here when you want to - you can also private message me if you need any advice re help for your grandmother. The helpers should be able to wash up..that's nonsense. Is it a private company or free entitled help? Not that it should make a difference. No excuse for ready meals really...not very good for her nutritionally. You did a sweet thing to cook...sorry it went so pear-shaped.

Does your grandmother have lots of visitors or plenty to do? Boredom and frustration can be a horrible partnership and make people grumpy. They store up all their resentment and then they see you....bingo, you get the brunt of it...