TV policy in PILs house drove me up the wall

[festiveflashingmammaries]

we stayed at PILs house over xmas for 2 days and had a lovely time

but

The TV is on all the time with 2 options

Either the TV is on full blast with nobody watching it so nobody can hear anyone else talking.

or

We all sit down and watch something and everybody talks over the TV and it is impossible to hear what is going on.

You must understand that this is a policy established over many years and is not open to Negotiation (thorny subject)

Furthermore ..... the cats and dogs are allowed to sit ON the table while we are eating and scavenge to their hearts' content .............

also a non negotiable policy

Infuriating!

Oh no! When we go to my PiL we sneakily turn the TV off when they are out of the room.
And try to talk to them.

No wonder they hate us!

The dogs and cats sit on the table when people are eating? That is vile!

Yuck!

Are they quite old and starting to go deaf? You could ask them very nicely if they have thought of getting hearing aids. They might take the hint then.

like the cats and dogs dont sit on the table during the full on xmas lunch but at tea time etc .... can't stand it

This drives me absolutely nuts. You are right to be irritated. My pils are the same.

Different strokes i suppose.
I bloody hate the tv being on all the time but have friends who seem never to turn it off.
I always turn it off if we hve visitors.

Christmas day was great,we went to DDs and the TV was off all day except for Dr Who which Ds2 watched...he's a bit of an addict

TV on when you have visitors????? RUDE!!!!!!

It's like saying - "thanks for coming but you bore us so we need entertaining".

No TV when we have visitors - sorry - that's my house rule!

Just goes to show we're all different.

Ugh (to both Rules)

When I was a kid the radio and tv were always on, it still is in my parents house and I hate it.

DH finds tv quite comforting so is more likely to watch something just for the hell of it. We have talked a lot about this issue and have reached a compromise though :)

I'm easily distracted so hate it when other people have tv on when we are visiting.

Could you suggest subtitles? Good compromise for when some people really want to watch something and others want to chat (which is almost inevitable when entertaining 3 generations at Christmas).

My MIL waits til people leave the room and then changes the channel. Goodbye Dr Who/Eastenders christmas special/whatever hello Ms Marple-that-MIL-has-seen-50-times-already. Great Assuming no one insists the channel is changed back she will then sit and tell you who the frigging killer is anyway. Gee, thanks.

As for your inlaws cats sitting on the table at meal times- thats all kinds of wrong imo. Yuck.

Cats on the table?...YUCK.
Our dog gets booted moved into another room when we're eating.
She's an awful beggar and sits and stares while we're eating.

That is beyond minging (animals on the table) and beyond rude ( tv on)

You've married badly darling, is it too late to go home to mother?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

There are lots of good films on at Xmas, unfortunately you can't hear about 70% of them because of someone going 'Oh how clever, how do you think they do that?' 'Wasn't he the one in the play that Alison saw?' 'Why did she go in there?' 'Isn't she married to the other one?'

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUUUUUUUP

PILs ahve the TV on loud - usually for DH's grandma who is deaf but sometimes she's not there and I think they forget.
I hate it - I can't gather my thoughts when there is someone else talking loudly!
Dogs and cats on the table - urgh!

TV on - Rude

Animals on table - words fail me! We have 2 cats and a dog. They are not allowed in the room when we eat.

Oh, sorry, missed the bit about the animals. Must just point out my PILs don't do that -just the TV thing!

Agree re both. I'm not opposed to all TV, have just been away for several days with relatives and initially we watched very little TV but after a few days were watching a bit more, but did discuss what we watched and if playing a game etc TV was put off. Iff we were watching the TV we were watching the TV though, if you wanted to chat you went into a different room.
I suspect I'd say something if relatives like that and/or stay for minimal period, although I remember visiting my grandparents and the TV being permanently on in the background with everyone talking over it. My dad must have hated this though as at the time he was of the "you only turn the TV on if you've looked at the paper and know what you are going to watch" school of thought. He politeley sat through hours of it though.

Yes, my PILs do the same on both counts (TV, I mean, not animals).

MIL likes to have the radio on in the kitchen and the TV on in front room at all times, whether anyone is in the room with them or not.

When they stayed over at Christmas one year she watched every special of all the soap operas. We don't watch any of them, it was very tedious.

Grandfather-in-law will come and visit us, plonk himself down on sofa and turn on horse racing. It goes on for hours. Children get very bored. But it's OK, apparently, to be rude when you're that old.

My parents are the opposite - they only allow TV if you are watching something specific, and not if there are guests.

Aargh, reminds of PILs - whenever we visit, about 3 times a year for 4-5 days at a time. if I'm watching something in the living room on my own he comes in, turns the volume down to zero, sits in his chair and watches the silent TV. Don't mind if I'm just filling in time but if it's something I want to watch it's a bit annoying!

Cats on the table - ask them politely to leave.

Take drugs.

If someone did that to me Sping spong I probably would say "I was watching that, but OK I get the point that I'm in your house and you don't want to watch it. Is there another TV I can watch please. I finishes at x time?"
Before going away I recorded programmes I was bothered about , so don't get bothered if disrupted part way through visiting people.

YANBU but, I don't think it is necessarily rude to have the telly on when your family visits. I spent Xmas with my parents and I would be astonished if my Dad turned the telly off in order to "entertain" us. We operate a sort of our house is your house policy I suppose. My parents have a top of the range Virgin subscription whereas I only have freeview so I quite like going around to theirs and watching some decent films.

But cats on the table - as someone said earlier "minging!"

Oh BIL's house has this telly rule too! The have additional rules though:

1. TV must be tuned into Sky Sports or third rate 'police, camera, action' type programme.

1. Interesting documentaries/The Arts/Anything on BBC2 and anything resembling period drama is banned.

1. All residents and visitors must face the television but talk loudly over it at the same time.

1. If you are able to play on a computer/console or fiddle with a mobile phone at the same time - so much the better

1. Attempts to turn down the volume/discuss anything other than Sport/Current affairs/fashion/sleb gossip will be met with hostile glances. This will continue until you submit.

1. Food will be served at some point. Preferably, you eat on your lap or if you must sit at the table, then adopt a vacant look and chew with your mouth open whilst craning your neck to look at telly.

Do not, under any circumstances, turn the telly off. The whole family will implode.

I hate going there.