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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The way to hell is paved with good intentions.

33 replies

WidowWadman · 28/12/2010 17:29

My brother got our daughter a wooden cart, to climb into and be pulled to the park for Christmas. It's beautiful, and what we asked for (after the daughter has seen one at her friends and cried when she had to get out.). My dad very kindly laquered it to make it more weatherproof. I should be over the moon.

Except for that it is more than twice as big as the one we had in mind, despite me sending my mother a picture, and my brother having been to visit us, so he knows how small the house is, he knows the shed is tiny, and full to the brim, he should bloody well have realised that it's too wide for our doors, and I've even got my doubts whether it'll fit down the alleyway. It's too tall for her to climb into on her own or pull it herself, too.

My family had been making jokes about it how big it was and whether it'll fit in the car for weeks (we live in UK, but spent Christmas with them in Germany), but at no point they actually stopped to think that it might be causing us a problem.

It gave me a crap christmas. I feel like an absolutely ungrateful spoilt bint, after all the daughter got what we asked for, it's beautifully made, my father put extra work in by painting it, and I've still been choking back the tears (well, pregnant, hormones, yada) about it for the past few days, as I didn't want to hurt anyone.

Stupidly I snapped today though, after yet another comment about how we're going to fit it all in the car. Now of course I managed to make them feel disappointed, and am the bad one, which makes me feel even more guilty.

And I'm stuck with a cart, which is big enough to be dragged by a small pony, and nowhere to put it, other than the garden, where it basically will go manky and rusty in no time, which kind of is not the point of what we've wanted.

And I'm still not sure whether I'm right to be annoyed, or just ungrateful.

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 28/12/2010 17:30

any chance you can sell on ebay and buy something more appropriate without telling them??

tingletangle · 28/12/2010 17:31

You are ungrateful .

WidowWadman · 28/12/2010 17:33

prettyfly - we probably will have to sell it - but no way that they're not going to notice that it's gone next time they visit.

OP posts:
BubbaAndBump · 28/12/2010 17:46

Just let it sit in the garden - most toys like that will be built for the outdoors. Your hormones may explain away some of your grumpiness, but essentially selling it or giving it away will upset your entire family including your daughter.

FellatioNelson · 28/12/2010 17:52

Try not to be ungrateful - they meant well and people without small children don't always see the obvious impracticalities in things that the rest of us do. Ship it home if need be, then buy a weather-proof cover for it like the kind you use to cover barbecues and garden furniture. You can store other smaller outside toys in it, and keep it (and them) dry and in nice condition through the winter.

DwpAnxt · 28/12/2010 17:52

Leave it out in the garden. It has been lacquered and will stand some weathering.Or make some room in the shed for it - surely not everything in there is precious?
Is it like [[http://www.toypost.co.uk/product.php?productid=852 this one?]If so your Dd will grow into it and it will last for years . Im quite Envy -we would have had such good fun with such a cart.

DwpAnxt · 28/12/2010 17:54

Well the link worked in preview Blush
try this

WidowWadman · 28/12/2010 17:54

The daughter is two - so I guess she wouldn't notice if we exchanged it for a smaller one, which we could actually use.

Selling it would probably upset the rest of the family, so maybe we just need to leave it to rot in the garden, which I find sad, it's too beautiful, to be not looked after. But when it comes to chosing between chucking out the sofa to make space or leaving it in the garden, I guess the garden wins. Not sure how much they'd be upset to notice that it's being left outside, though.

I guess some of my reaction can be explained by hormones, but I just can't understand how they can be so thoughtless and thoughtful at the same time.

OP posts:
littleducks · 28/12/2010 17:54

You are pg? then wont a bigger cart that can fit two be better long term?

Hassledge · 28/12/2010 17:55

If it's lacquered it should last a while as a garden toy - especially if you can find a bit of tarpaulin or something to draipse over it. Yes, they were a bit thoughtless but in the grand scheme of things it's not worth getting wound up about - and it was well intentioned thoughtlessness.

RudolfThePinkNosedReindeer · 28/12/2010 17:56

Put it in the garden covered with a tarpaulin or something similar. Sorted.

Tortington · 28/12/2010 17:57

lordy just buy a cover for it ffs.

pregnant people...geeesh

TattyDevine · 28/12/2010 17:58

You could give birth in it. Or your husband could wheel you to the hospital in it!

lifeinagoldfishbowl · 28/12/2010 17:59

Agree with Rudolph buy some tarpaulin like some people put on their cars in the winter months and leave in the garden.

WidowWadman · 28/12/2010 17:59

Dwpnaxt - the one in the link was the size we had in mind when we asked for it - the one they got is at least a foot longer, and obviously wider, too.

I would make room in the shed, if I could, but the shed is actually quite small, and we only have stuff in there which can't store elsewhere (we chucked all the stuff we didn't need anymore when we moved 4 months ago)

OP posts:
Hassledge · 28/12/2010 17:59

Drill some holes in the bottom for drainage and use it as a raised bed type thing?

thenightsky · 28/12/2010 18:03

Sell it cheap to a local mumsnetter on the condition you can borrow it back when said relatives visit?

hatesponge · 28/12/2010 18:06

you can buy weatherproofcovers for BBQs etc cheaply in 99p/pound shops, get one of those and cover it up. It would prob be ok even if not covered, but certainly will be fine with a cover over it.

Alternatively is there anything in the shed you could store outside to make room for it?

MerrilyDefective · 28/12/2010 18:06

Can't you just put a cover/tarpaulin over it?
We have to do this with bikes as there's limited space in the garden.

ForFestiveSake · 28/12/2010 18:10

could you not use it inside as a toy box or for books etc? How often would it be used for the park?

A plus side is that it'll last her until she's older. And you could possibly fit both kids in once the baby is a bit bigger.

WidowWadman · 28/12/2010 18:15

ForfestiveSake - that was the original plan - to keep inside when not used outside, and keep toys in. But it's too big for that - I still would like to have a living room which doesn't feel like just a storage space. Our house is very small.

Will look into the tarpaulin option, though.

OP posts:
ForFestiveSake · 28/12/2010 18:21

Would it not fit in the bottom of a cupboard as shoe storage or something? (like under the stairs etc?)

I don't know why I'm desperately trying to think of solutions for you - I'm sad at the thought of it rotting as it sounds lovely!

Personally, I'd not bother with half the baby chair type things and stick baby in there with a pillow - but then, I am the weirdo who used a giant flexi tub for months with DS...

chivers1977 · 28/12/2010 18:21

One of these should do the job just fine

AlistairSim · 28/12/2010 18:25

Could you get a couple of large dogs to pull it?

LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse · 28/12/2010 18:29

just look at it as perfect excuse to buy a pony?

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