Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

To cancel my new years eve party?

23 replies

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 16:41

The kids all had some kind of flu' before Christmas. Now I seem to have it. I have a temperature and sore lungs and feel pretty bad.

We're supposed to be having a NYE party. Around 20 people and some of their kids have confirmed. There are around the same number still dithering playing it by ear.

Thing is, I'm stressed about it now. I think, given that we've all be ill over christmas and I'm ill now, I should cancel and get on with it to enable people to make alternative arrangements.

DH says we can't cancel and informs me I'll be better by Friday.

What would you do?

OP posts:

HettyAmaretti · 28/12/2010 16:43

Either you cancel or DH does all the work. I'd cancel.

violethill · 28/12/2010 16:46

I would postpone and have a Not New Year party a few weeks down the line when you're better. By about February everyone will be desperate for some socialising again

Original poster

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 16:47

He'll say ... 'Don't worry I'll do all the work' then he actually won't because he doesn't fully understand what it takes to run this house and have a party too.

I worry that I will leave lots of people and their kids in the lurch. People are bringing decks, vinyl and all sorts of stuff.

My other option would be to let him have the party and go off to my mums in Dorset for a couple of days to recuperate. Can't see him liking that idea.

OP posts:

southeastastra · 28/12/2010 16:47

sounds fun! i wouldn't cancel but then again would love a party like that

Original poster

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 16:48

That's not a bad idea violet. It's always good to have a party in February to see you through the winter. Thing is by then I will be back at work so recovery time won't exist.

OP posts:

chrimblycompo · 28/12/2010 16:49

I think if you've all been ill this is just what you need
think of the kids and how much they'll enjoy it
it's only one night
and it's not until Friday evening
it will look odd to cancel today for something that isn't until Friday
but next year let someone else invite you to their party

Original poster

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 16:50

This is just it SEA. It would be fun. We did it last year. We have quite a lot of parties and most people don't invite kids so I reckon it must be nice for people as they don't have to find a babysitter but they can have a proper party.

I wish more people would do it so I didn't always have to.

OP posts:

HettyAmaretti · 28/12/2010 16:55

My DP would also allegedly do all the work and still leave a mountain for me (genuinely believing he'd done everything).

I agree with Violet.

SpringHeeledJack · 28/12/2010 17:00

oh, it sounds fab

you should be fine by Friday- by which time, of course, dp would have done all the prep work (as directed by you), leaving you free to have fun. Sounds like you deserve it, after a Poorly Christmas. At least that way you get something back

can I come please

ilovesooty · 28/12/2010 17:01

YANBU. Cancel it. Hope you're better soon.

VallhalaLalalalalalalalaaaaaa · 28/12/2010 17:02

I'm with Hetty and would, if DH were determined to selfishly go ahead and yet leave me with all the work, go away for New Year leaving him to handle the party and the children singlehandedly. If he didn't like it, that would be tough AFAIAC.

bellavita · 28/12/2010 17:06

DH and I have been and still are ill from this horrible virus thing going around. The last thing I would like to be is hostess to a new years eve's party.

Fibonacci · 28/12/2010 17:08

YANBU - you should cancel then you won't worry about whether you'll be well enough by Friday. My Mum has had this flu thing for a week now. people will understand.

defineme · 28/12/2010 17:09

I would write him the mother of all lists including all the day to day stuff that needs to be done as well as the party stuff.

Then I'd say 'here you go-I wrote a list to help you out as you don't do the organising as much as me. I'm afraid I have to go to bed nnow, it would be great if you kept the kids quiet. I think I better stay in bed all tomorrow too.'

It does look a bit shit if it's the family party and you cancel cos you are ill-would you cancel if dh had flu?

I was ill for 2 weeks with 'mild flu', but I could do social things by the end of the first week as long as I did none of the work.

herbietea · 28/12/2010 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 17:16

I am worried I won't be well in time and the worrying isn't going to help the healing process.

What about the idea of my going to mums for a couple of days so they can have the party without me. Is that too weird?

OP posts:

violethill · 28/12/2010 17:24

Yes, you'll miss the fun.

Postpone!

izzywizzywoowooo · 28/12/2010 17:26

YANBU - Hope you get better soon.

WimpleOfTheBallet · 28/12/2010 17:29

Can you write him some basic instructions and then bugger off? It'll turn out fine...if there are people, music and drink there's a party.

cupofteaplease · 28/12/2010 17:31

I wouldn't cancel. Only because it is very late notice for all the people who have planned to spend their new year's eve with you.

However, I'd ask your dh to be prepared to do the lion's share of the work.

defineme · 28/12/2010 17:31

Not weird at all-it's afamily party-lots of people counting on coming. Maybe contact those that you can and let them know it's dh single handed- they may pitch in to help.

Aims80 · 28/12/2010 17:37

It's a bit late notice to cancel really. I'd give him a list and rest for a couple of days so you can enjoy the party.

Original poster

Spidermama · 28/12/2010 17:38

Good idea. Was already thinking I should get people to contribute to the buffet because if you don't specifically ask people they won't do it.

I think I'll go to mum's tomorrow and leave dh to it. If I feel well enough I may or may not deign to join my party on the night.

Sounds like a plan to me.

OP posts:

Flip