To think that I need space too?

[MustBeeNewName]

First up, I am sorry if I offend anyone who has less living space than us.

Our house has a lounge, a study/office and a kids' room. The "kids' room" has cable TV and the lounge has Freeview TV.

The lounge was really carefully put together to give me a "chill space" because I work long hours, self-employed and work from home in the "office". It is a calm and really nice space - ot that was the plan!

DS1 (teenager) is totally monopolising the kids' room with his XBox and the cable TV and he snarls at anyone who ventures in there. (None of the rest of us are interested in the extra cable stations, BTW - the cable thing was an accident because we didn't think that we would get digital reception here! We bought a bundle of phone, broadband and TV because it was the cheapest option.)

DS2 can't get at any of the toys in the kids' room because DS1 is hogging it. So DS2 has migrated to the lounge and monopolises the TV with his PS3 and Nintendo Wii.

DH is capable of getting fierce and insisting to watch something more interesting on TV, but only when it is something that he wants to watch or that he and DS2 can watch together. (So forget DVDs like Notting Hill, The Queen, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Pride & Prejudice and an incy-wincy bit of Reality TV!)

And me? In the evening I end up in the study/office watching live TV on the computer at the same desk I work at all day! No sofa, no chill, no change of scene.

I know, I KNOW I am just being soft, but what do I do? This has gone on for 3 - 4 years now and I am pig-sick of it!

The only suggestion that I knolw I can't cope with is "get another TV"! It is so tempting, and I have been looking at recliner chairs for the study/office lately as well, but WHY should I have to do that? And the last thing I need is TVs in the bedrooms - policing that would be a nightmare!

I do know that this is not the most important thing in the world right now, but please can you knock some sense in to me? (Prepares for bruises!)

Lots of helpful arse-kicking, thank you!

They have far too much screen time, without a doubt. The problem is that I also spend huge amounts of time at my PC and they love to throw that back at me, but it is because I am WORKING (sometimes in the evenings), a fact that they conveniently overlook. However, it has all become a downward spiral over a few years. When I posted last night it was because I realised that they were watching the same damn programme in different rooms while I was marooned here at the PC reading endless MiL threads on MN.

So, new rules, family conference and time to find out how to password code the TVs and to set the timers on the XBox, pS3, all of it. (That'll be a shock to the system, the first time it switches itself off in the middle of a game. The howls of anguish will probably be heard 3 counties away.) If DH is lucky I might tell him the password for the TV in the lounge ...

(As for the snarling teenager, that is probably a whole new AIBU. When he's good, he's very, very good but when he snarls he's beyond awful. I don't suppose he's much worse than some, but there is definitely room for improvement. )

I think your idea of a family conference sounds like a great one, but maybe you need to make sure you also give them space to say if there's any of your behaviour (particularly around screens) that they find difficult. Maybe they find it a bit upsetting that you're working in the evenings rather than spending time with them, for example. I'm not saying you're BU to work in the evenings, of course, but that they might find it a bit upsetting all the same, despite being Big Bad Teenagers who Don't Care.

Your teenager should not be ruling the roost.

It is not up to him where the younger one goes, especially wrt a family room.

Remember YOU are the parent here. What you say Must Be Obeyed!