To be angry with my whole family at Christmas?

[mychristmasjingle]

I posted this in AIBU as I can take it I want honest answers.

Family member has their Christmas plans cancelled, they ask if I can accommodate. No problem I say. Then I find out AFTER everyone else in the family this persons plans have now changed.

I was a bit put out as I only found out via FB, yes the evil of FB that this was the case when DH was out restocking for our extra guest.

Not a problem that the plans had changed, I wouldn't have minded being told before other people though and before FB, that's how I knew not to restock, so contacted DH, they didn't phone me.

So I am a bit pissed off to say the least, I said why to this person. But they just dismissed it as being stupid and out of order for being a bit put out. No I don't mind plans have changed it's just manners.

But then after a couple of VODKAS they text me throwing in insults such as psycho, we all know you are mental etc. Just because I happened to be a bit pissed off they told the whole world before me plans had changed and that's how I found out, I thought it was rude and called them on it. Is that so bad?

I had a bout of depression shortly before and after my childs birth, As I was very ill and my was DC too, critically so. I thought at the time being in a dark place, I could confide in my family as I was all over the place, now it's thrown back in my face? I am just so . I then told said person to fuck off and not contact me again.

I then get my mother pissed on the phone (alcoholic)giving me abuse because I told said person to fuck off. Ok I shouldn't have swore but grrrrrrr. Now I am the bitch of the piece as said person has told everyone "their" version and I can't be arsed with the dramatics of it all, I have my family to worry about, they are single so have time for all the drama.

AIBU to be highly pissed off with my whole family at Christmas, families eh?

If it's only one person then what's the problem....
Two or three extra roast pots??
Don't get into a row..rise above it.

YANBU. They have no manners and you're probably better off not having them with you for Christmas. Throughing your health problems in your face is really low.

Not sure if i read this right.. Z has had plans cancelled, asks if you can help. You agree to have Z over for xmas dinner, but then Z tells everyone else their plans have changed again without letting you know. Meaning you have gone out to buy extra food etc, when they are not coming but they didnt tell you?

I'd agree merrily but I was going out to get stuff specifically for them, they are so fussy and wouldn't eat/drink what I had! That and the logistics in the house I have got tbh made it a bit of a mare, but they really wanted to come here, and I wans't going to let them down.

But I see what you are saying! I don't know if I can rise above them throwing my previous PND in my face though

Yes mumcan, I found out via FB and all the family had already been phoned.

I agreed to have them for the whole w/end.

Then no YANBU.

YANBU if you've already gone and brought extras especially for them.
I didn't get that from OP.

Well my Dh was anyway, samething lol!Ho hum, but I have had to switch my phone off so my mum stops harassing

Try not to worry too much, you have not done anything wrong, you were in the right.

Understandable you told them to fuck off, mean bastards.

How dare they use a bout of depression against you that real pisses me off.

Don;t you go apologising now you have no need to.

You and yours have a great Christmas and remember in future to fuck the lot of them. (Not literally)

tell em all to fuck off

then de facebook them

and change your number

fucking arseholes

YANBU

What a really vile and abusive reaction you got from both your mum and the would-be guest.

Sorry to hear that they would throw your depression back at you. My bitch sister used to do this all the time to me. She is alcoholic and drunken "truthful" texts was her preferred method too. Our relationship ended when she told me 5 years ago that I deserved to lose my baby...... :(.

For your own sanity, take a deep breath and let them continue to do what they will but keep yourself away from it.

De facebooking people should be my new years resolution...
Actually it WILL be..

Thanks, ladies, I like the idea of de FB, infact I am just going to scrap the whole thing!

I just really lost my temper when they said that and had a fit of rage telling them to fuck off, no doubt that's cemented me as a "psycho" now As all they have been telling people is "jingle told me to fuck off, she's lost it"........My Dad is supportive, my mum just throws abuse my way when pissed, meh. That's why they split years ago.

tell her to fuck off drunk dialing

get caller id

That's horrible calling you a psycho and using your depression against you! Who needs people like that in their life!

It was really rude of them to mess you around like that. It is the person who has the problem.... kind of makes you realize why they didnt have any where to go before asking you. Let someone else put up with them for the day and think yourself lucky to of gotten them out your hair. find ways to chill yourself so you dont let it spoil your day tomorrow.

YADNBU. I am actually feeling incandescent with rage on your behalf. Not over the Xmas incident which for the record, is pretty rude, but for using your depression against you and for showing a complete disregard over what you went through after you had your DC, Fuck'em. You don't need people like that in your life, you are better and deserve better than that. Hope you have a lovely Xmas with the people who matter. Karm will come back and bite this person on the arse one day.

Yanbu, how rude of your potential guest.

YADNBU- it's absolutely horrible how this person has thrown your depression back in your face and called you names I feel really cross on your behalf.

They were very rude to ask to come for Xmas and then change plans again without letting you know.

I hope you still manage to have a nice Xmas.

Definitely not being unreasonable! What an ignorant self indulgent prick and I'm so sorry your stuck with a rotten mother :( I hope your little one is better and the depression is gone, stay right out of it with them don't bother explaining to people your a kind person who was very willing to have someone at the drop of a hat share Xmas with your family tis their luck out they will be elsewhere, don't let their ignorant manners and abuse spoil you and your families holidays. I hope ye have a lovely stress free time :)