to want crying child removed from ballet audience?

[Lardycake]

I went up to London the other day to see the Nutcracker at the Coliseum. It was a matinee and advertised as a child-friendly performance, and the audience was packed with parents and children. It was noisy, there were sweets being unwrapped and handed round during the performance, and whispered running commenteries. I think it's a good thing to introduce children to theatre-going early, and was willing to tolerate such distractions. But one child began crying during the second act, and cried throughout several dances, including the Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy, yet its mother did not take it outside. It was incredibly distracting to me (it ruined my enjoyment, in fact), and must have been just as distracting to the dancers and musicians. Am I being unreasonable in thinking that this child should have been removed from the audience by its mother, or failing that, that both should have been asked to go outside until the child stopped crying?

Child friendly is not code for anything goes. It allows for a little more noise than would be acceptable at a standard performance.

if you want no crying then don't go to a family friendly performance.

Theya re advertised as family friendly as children can be unpredictable & soemtimes cry or speak etc.

Personally i would take my crying child out for the benefit of others but perhaps this parent was not able to do so for whatever reason.
It's xmas, it was a family performance, relax!

wtf anyone would take a child obviously too young to appreciate it to a performance like that? showing off probably

Even at a family friendly performance etiquette and consideration for others should still apply.

A little crying,is to be expected, but it's extremely rude and inconsiderate to both the audience and performers not to remove a child who is crying repeatedly or for longer than a minute,and not terribly fair to the distressed child either.

At least you know that next time, don't go to a child friendly performance.

I have to admit I'd expect crying and general hulabaloo at a child friendly performance, it's not anything goes if a baby cries that's entirely different from a toddler/child kicking off. A babe in arms can be forgiven everything IMO.

YANBU

There is a difference between child friendly performances and crying baby friendly.

They should have a minimum age on it. Maybe 4? Lets face it, very young children and babies just aren't going to behave for it or sit for such a long performance and that's going to spoil it for the older children who want to enjoy it though.

The performance was not advertised as child-friendly when I booked it online. That information only appeared on the ticket when I received it. when I saw it, I decided to go prepared for a little disturbance and distraction. I'm wondering if FabbyChic knows what ballet is all about, especially the individual dances in the second part of the Nutcracker, some of which are very quiet and haunting and require enormous concentration. I can understand the performers (including a full orchestra)expecting a low level of noise distraction with an audience full of children, but I think being in an audience with a baby bawling for 20 minutes is simply inconsiderate to the dancers, the musicians, and to the rest of the audience,some of whom have spent around £100 to see it. As several of you have said, it's not a Panto.

I have never heard of any theatre not allowing children in to a performance.

FuturePM I hardly think calling a baby a "little bastard" for crying is proportionate

"A babe in arms can be forgiven everything" Quite, but the issue is with the rude parents. I can only imagine they don't go out much.

you kjnow, ive been thinking about this and Im glad that I didnt take ds to see the nutcracker. I am a total ballet virgin and was not bought up around any music other than queen. we recorded it and are watching it right now, but I would have been terrified that someone like the OP would judge us if ds was less than silent. despite the nutcracker being (as i understand) a bellet aimed at children, its a shame that people like me would be scared off.

I think FuturePM was being sarcastic....I don't get though why you would take a little baby to the ballet OR a panto.

but what age CAN you take a child? I was hoping to take ds next year if there is a local performance, he will be six and tbh, this has put me right off. what if he loudly announces that he wants a poo during the snowflakes dance?!

YANBU. I can't imagine why someone would take a baby to a performance like that, much less ruin others' enjoyment by staying when it cried.

My dd was honestly about 4 or 5 before she would sit through anything - cinema, theatre etc. I do get the idea of those day time movie showings where you can take the whole family. That is what they are for. If you want to watch in true peace, you go another time.

YANBU. But I blame the management. If the mother was to thick or self absorbed to remove crying baby they should have intervened (and there should have been a clause when buying tickets that crying infants have to be removed). It was unfair and rude to audience and insulting and distracting to dancers.

"A babe in arms can be forgiven anything".

Well yes, they are clueless, it's the clueless parents who won't take them OUT of restaurants/theatres/Wedding cermonies that cannot be forgiven. A babe in arms always has a responsible adult with them. Beaming and saying 'a babe in arms.....' Aaaaagh!!

thats what i figured panto, we go to the kids club showings at the cinema and i would have booked matinee/child friendly performances. I get why the op is annoyed, I would be too. I dont think you should take a small baby to the cinema/bellet/theatre and if you do, a crying child should be removed. its common courtesy, but this thread has made me really nervous. I was planning on a matinee so that if ds did cheer at the nutcrackers battle with the mice I didnt feel like such an uncultured oaf.

Here's the problem - anyone with half a brain cell wouldn't take children likely to ruin a performance for other people to the ballet. (And I'm including crying babies, sulking teenagers, the enthusiastic child who will dance on top of their seat or eat too many sweets and throw up etc. in this).

But because people don't use their common sense, perfectly well behaved children get scowled at by adults when they go to normal performances, so kids get coralled into "child friendly" performances. We shouldn't need child specific performances because they shouldn't be going unless they can behave to an acceptable level.

If we all just stuck to not taking children liable to ruin the performance, it would be fine.

Not unreasonable - but worth complaining to the theatre so they know for next time.

a child whispering, parent getting up to take child to toilet ect is what i expect when going to child friendly preformances.

what i don't want is a crying from a baby, for a few minutes it's ok (perhaps mum doing a bottle/getting ready for breastfeeding, however if the baby is still crying take them out

but you cant predict how a child will react. imo, child friendly performances are there to introduce children to the joys of the theatre/ballet/cinema. the first time i took ds to the cinema, he went to the loo about 100 times and kept trying to talk to me. thats why we went to a child friendly showing, because I didnt know how he would behave in that situation. now I would be happy to take him to a normal showing.

but we are not a family that frequents the theatre, and he has fallen in love with the story of the nutcracker. we are actually watching it right now and he is pretending to dance along. should I not take him because he might get a little over-excited? should theatre not be for the masses? and surely, the only way you can introduce a child to the ballet is by taking the risk?

We took our 3 dcs to see a matinee of a west end musical. DD (the youngest)was 4. It was made clear to us by staff that one of us would have to take her out if she disturbed the performance. We thought that was entirely reasonable.

In fact she was as good as gold throughout, but I would have taken her out immediately if she had created any disturbance.

Tickets are horrendously expensive and I wouldn't want to spoil anybody else's experience.

Wewish

You should take him but leave any babies at home, or alert him that you will have to leave if baby cries. or bring another adult so you can leave if baby cries.

'Child friendly' and 'baby friendly' are different concepts and parents who ignore that difference are rude and inconsiderate.

oh, its just him, and when he first asked if we could go and see it I was very clear thhe would have to be on his best behavious or we would leave. but I was worried for the reasons on this thread. i totally agree that crying children should be removed, but my worry is knowing where the line is.