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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think dh should not vary how he is with me due to how i look

13 replies

carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 14:06

right last night, i did look like a bit of a mess.

had a bath with dd so by the time i got her sorted my hair dried like a frizzy mess.
i was wearing a horrible grey jumper with a tshirt you could see underneath, as the jumper had a lower neckline than the jumper

and i was wearing my glasses instead of my lenses

anyway, unless this is a coincidence, ive noticed dh is nicer to me when i look good.

by nicer to me, i dont mean anything serious like hes horrible to me if i look a mess, but there to me, just seems to be something in the way he talks to me when i look like yesterday

for example he seemed a bit miserable, not really miserable thats not the right word but he waasnt upbeat or jolly

then dd had left a half eatten milky way on the side, and he went yuk is that a half eaten sweet onthe side, difficult to describe really just its his overall manner and tone.

today, im wearing nice clothes and look nice, bet he'll be as nice as pie to me

surely thats wrong really?

OP posts:
5GoldenFimbos · 23/12/2010 14:09

Is he like this all the time? Does he have morning sex or do you need to look glam?

My dh loves me for me, whilst he appreciates it when I am dressed up, he doesn't care if I look like a dog some days.

Saltatrix · 23/12/2010 14:10

It can be a subconscious reaction, people have a tendency to react positively to things they find visually appealing even if they are not aware they are doing it.

TyraG · 23/12/2010 14:11

Same here 5GF, he loves me regardless of how I look.

JingleBelleDameSansMerci · 23/12/2010 14:11

I'd say it's a bit off and, if you're right, YANBU.

Have you noticed this on a number of occasions?

TrillianAstra · 23/12/2010 14:14

Are you nicer to him if he has shaved recently and smells nice? It's probably not a conscious thing.

carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 14:17

yes i'm wondering if its subconscious.

i have noticed it before, hes alw2ays nice as pie when i look nice.
its not that hes horrible if i look like a state but its more hes not as nice i guess.

i suppose he'll be in a great mood btonight anyway as his finished work now for xmas.

OP posts:
carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 14:18

ta good question, perhaps i am, i don't reallyknow.

OP posts:
carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 14:19

no hes not just a night person, i always go to bed bare faced etc anyway.

OP posts:
TrillianAstra · 23/12/2010 14:19

Oddly I think I am nicer if I feel that I look good. If I feel like I look scruffy it puts me in a bad mood, unless it is deliberate scruffiness.

carriedaxmaspudding · 23/12/2010 14:21

perhaps i should conduct a test.

lol

OP posts:
fluffygal · 23/12/2010 14:28

Trillian I am the same, and I can't take compliments from OH when I know I don't look good!

BettyCash · 23/12/2010 14:29

Also maybe it's not just him - I know I feel more sexy when I've made an effort (although looking like crap doesn't mean I won't be getting any, IYKWIM!)

create · 23/12/2010 14:39

I love DH always, but I know I'm more likely to show it if he's had a shower and shave and has some respectable clothes on rather than the mnaky tracksuit bottoms he often wears around the house "to save the good stuff". Don't suppose it's any different for them

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