Opinions please! Does she want me not to buy for her child?

[anothernewname09]

Me and my cousins DD are the same age. Since they have been born I have bought her DD a present for last Christmas, 1st birthday and now this Christmas.
We live about an hour away from each other but both have relatives in each others hometown IYSWIM. So do meet up from time to time and it is pretty easy to drop gifts off etc so that the other person can pick them up.
The thing is, she has never actually bought my child anything. She says she has and then tells me she has forgot it next time we meet/ cross paths etc etc and nothing ever transpires.
Now before you all judge me I really really really do not mind her not buying my DD a gift. She doesn't know and does not want for anything. However, I know this couple are a little hard up at the moment, and if Christmas funds are tight I would much rather them buy their baby a present over mine.
I also don't mind buying and not receiving presents. Again, doesn't bother me.

However am I making her uncomfortable by buying presents for her DD? Is that why she says she has one for my DD and then nothing turns up?

Forgot to add. I'm not being shitty about my DD nit getting presents. That is NOT the point of this thread.

I just don't want her to feel like she has too but can't afford it IYSWIM.

Has she arranged to pop in? If not I would not bother mentioning anything. It is hard to break for the first year.

Sorry Santa? Don't understand- hard to break?
I text her the other day and said shall we meet up as I have present. She just said she is busy and will catch up in the new year.

she probably just says that because she feels embarrassed she can't reciprocate. You know this lady - I think you will just have to go with your gut instinct on this one.

i think the direct approach is best (although probably a bit late for this year given that you have told her already you have something).

i discuss with family and friends whether we are buying for the kids this year and if so how much we are spending.

I think I would just stop buying a present. I have lots of friends whose babies I have bought presents for on their first birthday/Christmas and then it just drifted off. I don't think she will see anything pointed about it.

I wouldn't buy anymore. If she can't or doesn't want to buy any more presents then you probably are making her uncomfortable by buying for her dd.