Ok, this could be longish....it was dd's 5th party today, we had a party at home planned for the girls in her class, she was very excited about the whole thing. I wanted to bake her cake and dh had loads of party games organized etc.
Then I got really really sick with suspected pneumonia on Thursday, have never been so sick in my life. My parents came down on friday supposedly to 'help' over the weekend. I cannot move out of bed. I had most of the shopping for the stuff for the party already bought inc all the ingredients for her cake. But now I couldn't make it, baking isn't dh's thing and he's up the walls trying to work and look after dd and myself. I ask my mother to go to town on saturday & get a cake and a few other bits. She needs me to write her a list of everything as she cannot seem to figure out what basics might be needed - like milk, bread etc. I write the list with a pounding head and off she goes. She comes back without a load of the stuff - apparently M&S was mobbed and she got sick of looking for it all. She got entirely the wrong cake, despite a detailed description of the one to get - ok, I swallow my annoyance.
She didn't get anything that dd or dh or df could eat for dinner either of the night, nor did she offer to even try to sort something out. Dh went out in the ice to get a chinese for them that night. Which annoyed me too - there was no reason she couldn't have stuck an M&S ready meal in the trolley..
This morning dh was trying to get everything rready for the party - kids coming at 12, my mother stayed in bed till 10.30am, then started faffing about making breakfast for herself - I heard her say to dh 'oh I'll let you sort yourself out, I don't know what you'd like' I didn't get offered as much as a cup of tea. I had asked her to get teabags as we were low when I got sick and I hadn't been to the shops. She forgot them, so there was no tea for me (my dad insists on using 2 teabags per mug, sometimes 3 so they really fly through them) ok....I am now sort of gritting my teeth a bit.
Doing the party food would usually be my area - I love that sort of thing, I heard dh asking her if she could put the cocktail sausages in the oven at a certain time for the kids to have & then some pizza - she started acting all confused about it 'oh how will i fit it all in, what time etc etc etc' on and on and on...ffs she is a 61yr old woman - how hard it it to lob a few bloody sausages in the fecking oven!!!
Then I heard her saying to dh 'relax, it will all get done - what will be will be and other shite of this nature' I swear I was lying in bed with my blood pressure rising. I ended up getting up about half an hour before the party went down and the kitchen was in chaos - she had made NO effort and was off having herself yet another cup of tea and more cake. I sroted the kitchen, put the stuff in the oven, put on the filter coffee for any parents dropping off children, set the table with the decorations ffor dd, I was dripping with sweat and exhausted and everytime I asked her to do something she either forgot to do it or half ddid it so I would end up coming along and fixing it.
The kids arrive, dh gets them all engaged in pplaying immediately so he is fully occupied with that, my mum half heartedly helps to serve the food to them with me & when the time comes
Then she goes off for another sit down as dh does all the tidying up when everyone is gone. He cooks dd's tea and gets her ready for bed, I crawled back to bed. While he was doing all that she made no effort to organize any dinner/tea for anyone, just sat on her arse drinking tea and eating more biscuits -they have eaten an entire tin of biscuits since fri night!
I am not normally so mean - i do not begrudge them te a & fecking biscuits but neither am i normally so sick or ever actaully 'need' them to help.
Is it too much to expect that she would have organized food on ONE of the nights they have been here?
They are coming back here for christmas next week and she has been saying things like 'don't forget the crackers when you are shopping,......like when the fu*k does she think i will be shopping with bloody pneumonia?????????
Dh is normally very even tempered but tonight he is sick & tired of it and I don't blame him. When he was getting dd to bed they ate all the sandwiches my sister had made earlier - never thought if he might be hungry - when he asked them she said 'oh we're fine we ate' FFS!!!
She basically wants to be waited on hand and foot when she's here and it's the same when she's at home if we visit 'oh I thought you'd cook tonight -I didn't know what you'd eat' etc
Anyway.....just having a rant coz I am feeling so shit and today was such an effort on many levels.
AIBU for expecting her to actually HELP a nbit more? She will head off tomorrow thinking she 'saved the weekend' by just bloody being here AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG