What am I supposed to think then??

[MoodSwingCentral]

My partner has been very good about the whole pregnant thing in general. He puts up with the epic Mood Swings I have been having (and that appear to be getting worse!) and very rarely snaps back at me.
However, we haven't been together very long at all. In fact, I fell pregnant after only 3 months, and he wasn't over the moon. We don't live together yet, and work opposite shifts. I'm finding it really hard not seeing him alot, and even though I have tried to talk to him about it, telling him that apparently I need alot of attention these days, he either hasn't listened or hasn't understood. How can I bring the subject up again without sounding like some wierdo stalker bunny boiler girlfriend who has just tried to trap him into a baby he doesn't want??

Not sure that AIBU is really the best place for this.

Have you been clear about what you actually want from him? "apparently I need alot of attention these days" sounds confusing to me, like you need some attention from him but are making a joke out of it in order not to seem needy, though I might have misread.

Are you getting to spend any decent time together to talk or just bickering?

Presumably he was half responsible for your unborn child.

Have you actually sat down and discussed your future together?

Lol, he was indeed half responsible. I suppose I did mis-word it. I don't even know whats wrong with me most of the time these days, so I do hide behind humour. You are very perceptive.
I did manage to sit him down and we did have a very long, honest coversation. I thought we had done really really well, sorted a couple of issues out. Apart from nothing seems to have changed on his side.
We aren't really spending decent, regular time together, which is why I thought that daily phone calls and contact was so important. Ths=e time we spend together is sporadic, which was brilliant before we fell pregnant.

Am expecting too much from him?

P.S. What does AIBU mean?

AIBU = Am I Being Unreasonable

I hate to ask, but if the time you spend together (whilst waiting for your child to be born) is sporadic, and the talk you had hasn't really changed things on his part - are you actually in a relationship?

Put this in the relationship section.

You will get support and advice from the lovely posters over there.

AIBU = am I being unreasonable? By posting in here you're asking other posters if you're being unreasonable - just thought you might get better responses in the relationship forum, for example.

You do sound a bit fed-up, but then pregnancy hormones can be a complete bitch.

What I think you're saying is that you've always seen each other sporadically and not that often due to other commitments, but now you're pregnant you'd like that to change. Does that sound about right? Not sure if you're being unreasonable or not really (helpfully!). On the one hand, I can see how carrying someone's child might entitle you to demand a bit more from them (probably not the best way of putting it but I am delirious with hunger) but I can see it from his POV too. FWIW, without wanting to generalise too wildly, it does quite often seem that men don't really "get" the whole pregnancy thing until they're faced with an actual baby.

Ah, I see! Lol, thank you.

Hmm, I see what you mean, it doesn't really sound like it does it? But it is a relationship, even if it is sporadic. There is a geographical issue as well as our working timetable to contend with as far as the time we spend together goes.

He is a couple of years younger than me, perhaps this is a factor too. Think I might just have to suck it up and look needy, make him sit down and tell him bluntly. Perhaps during a one of the mood swings I appear to have perfected.

Thanks Dita. Brilliant name by the way :D.

You have hit the nail right on the head. I have never been one of those girls who needs an awful lot of attention, never dealt with being stifled very well myself. Wouldn't want to inflict that on anyone lol. But I think being 5 and a half months pregnant with his child would entitle me to be more demanding than I usually would be by nature.

I think I might have to try this is the relationship section after all. It was my insecurities that made me put it here. I can never tell if my head or my hormones are running my body these days!!

I am getting a bit fed up now. I'm so massively pregnant, nothing fits and I don't seem to have that glow everyone else is raving about! And I never did really get over the overwhelming tiredness of the first trimester.

Sorry about the rant ladies! Just had to get it all out!

Must be hard to be pregnancy early in relationship, can't really imagine. I wonder if it might be a good idea to find some support from other sources too eg family & friends.

I think pregnancy hard on men, because they are not experiencing the mood swings, or hormones, even more so if you haven't been together that long. Maybe have a chat and say you are finding the mood swings etc very hard to deal with and you don't fell yourself.

And at 5.5 months you are not massively pregnant! That will come!