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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel a tiny pang of envy when......

13 replies

LauraNorder · 16/12/2010 21:36

....people become parents for the first time. It's so magical, just you and your tiny baby. I remember leaning over to DD and inhaling her breath. I also remember thinking that in a minute someone will come in and take her back to her real mummy as it was so hard to believe she was mine.

And then when you take them home to the peace of your home, something that can't be repeated with your next babies.

The births of all 3 of my children were lovely but becoming a mum for the first time was amazing. Something I didn't completely appreciate until I looked back sometime later.

OP posts:

RockinRobinBird · 16/12/2010 21:40

I know what you mean. I'm newly pg with dc2 and am excited and all that. But I was idly flicking through the Argos catalogue and realised that apart from a couple of new mattresses for moses baskets etc, I don't need a single other item. All the feverish excited shopping, aahhing over tiny clothes, picturing yourself with a baby....

When I was pg with DD, right up till the last minute I could not imagine a real live baby at the end of it, just didn't think it would happen. Even now I look at her (she's 2.11) and think shit, how did that happen? This time that disbelief isn't there. All things being equal there's a fair chance there will be a baby at the end of this and my head doesn't find that so hard to cope with now.

Original poster

LauraNorder · 16/12/2010 21:49

Well that's it isn't it, with subsequent children you kind of know what you're doing or at least what to expect.

It's that magical unknown journey that's so special with your first. My first is nearly 8 I can't believe it's gone so quickly.

OP posts:

TheCrackFox · 16/12/2010 21:56

I come over with a cold sweat when I think about the first few months of my first born's life.

muminthecity · 16/12/2010 21:59

I just cried reading this thread. Those magical moments when it's just you and your newborn are so, so precious. My PFB is 5 now and I won't be able to have anymore

MsFC · 16/12/2010 21:59

I'm with you, cracker......

Original poster

LauraNorder · 16/12/2010 22:01

Aw muminthecity I didn't mean to make you cry

OP posts:

redflag · 16/12/2010 22:01

Oh no for me the first time i took Ds home was a terrible time for me, I was so frightened he would die every five mins (our first son was still borne, not even a year before ds 2 was born) When i had Ds3 i really enjoyed him, and was able to let down my guard and completely enjoy him.

Maybee · 16/12/2010 22:02

So true, I remember more about my 8yr old's birth and early years than about my 3 year old and 15 month old.

Leaves thread before broodiness sets in again.

curlymama · 16/12/2010 22:04

I know what you mean, although I think I feel more nostalgic than envious. The first night after having my first baby was undoubtably the most special night of my life. Just me and my baby, in hospital while everyone else was asleep.

Aww, might just have to go and squish my now 11yo PFB.

geraldinetheluckygoat · 16/12/2010 22:04

I am half with OP and half with Crackfox. Haveing a new baby for the first time was amazing, but also terrifying and unspeakably exhausting - my first was an epic screamer. The second was more magical actually, as he fed and then you could lay him in his basket, and he would just lay there cooing for a bit and then just doze off. All by himself. Unbelievable!

Ormirian · 16/12/2010 22:05

But it's also terrifying and unsettling and exhausting!

AngelZigzagsSparklyYuletideLog · 16/12/2010 22:08

muminthecity.

I had nine years to wait for DD2, and when I was pregnant with her last year I really couldn't believe I would be 'allowed' to have two of them, and something would happen to stop it from turning out OK.

Luckily it was just pregnancy hormones and I she's been here nearly a year, it's almost like doing it again cos after nine years I've forgotten all the little bits and when you're supposed to do them. She's just going onto cows milk instead of formula and I can't for the life of me remember how we did it with DD1

Lonnie · 16/12/2010 22:10

Im smiling I remember that time so well and yes it was magical wonderful and oh so amazing no you dont get it again but you get many other wonderful things with the next ones..

One of my most precious moments is dd1 meeting dd2 for the 2nd time (as first time she as so not interested she wanted pingu on the tv and that was it) I remember my best friend sat holding dd2 at 4 hours old (homebirth)

I remember falling asleep with ds between dh and I in the carry cot because we were so worried he would break..

and I remember dd1 and 2 standing hand in had stars in eyes having just witnessed their youngest sister be born (very unplanned they where there she decided 5 -10 com and birth could be done in 15 mins)

i remember huge cuddle piles breastfeeding dd3 usually = the others snug up for cuddles..

smiles the magic is always there you just got to look elsewhere for it. (and i have been lucky to have the luxury of being able to stop and smell all of them when they where newborn.. i wish you could bottle that smell)

mm and im crying now

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