To expect dirty clothes to go IN to laundry basket

[nannyl]

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

We have a huge bedroom and in here we have a laundry basket.

OH find it impossible to put dirty clothes in to laundry basket but prefers to "keep" his worn clothes on the floor. (so many times i have asked WHY are clothes on the floor? A: cause thats where i keep them.)

about once or twice a week. after nagging said clothes get moved into laundry basket.

cleaner came to day so again nagged OH to move his clothes....

which he has done... to ontop of wardrobe (immediatly next to where he "keeps" his dirty clothes) as opposed to into laundry basket 2m away.

GRRR im so cross (our wardrobe is tall, OH is 6ftm im 5ft) I cant reach all his dirty clothes in the top of the wardrobe.

I ALWAYS do our colours on tues and friday and a white wash at the weekend.

I have just put on my friday night coloured wash as usual but have NOT put the clothes on top of wardrobe into wash.
(so machine is not full)

Have told OH he can wash it his self.

Am i being unreasonable to refuse to play 'catch up' (and end up having to do more loads of washing as a direct result) and make OH do it himself.
If he wanted them washing they should have been in the laundry basket, yes?

I WILL have time to do it this week, (I'm a teacher and i break up for Xmas on Wednesday) but the point is that im refusing too cause who in their right minds puts dirty clothes on top of wardrobe.

I do ALL the washing / ironing. If asked OH will hang out a load but i do the rest.

YANBU. Please, don't do his washing unless its in the laundry basket. Surely. Why would you go hunting for it on top of the wardrobe?

Can't he do his own washing?

thanks

i dont mind doing it.... so long as i can at least reach it. It makes sense to stick it all in together and save detergent / electricity and the environment etc

TBH i dont really want to look at his dirty clothes when in bed(on top of wardrobe that i can see but not reach) either!

Well... it's good of you to think of the environment. I never have this problem as I am always several loads of washing behind, so there is always a full load. My DH has the unfortunate habit of leaving smelly sweaty running kit all over the house, so I do sympathise.

oooh i get smelly sweaty running kit too from him.... sometimes days old in a rucksack

I LIKE to have a clear wash basket every weekend, which means i also have it clear mid week too.

I just hate seeing loads of washing, it somehow really stresses me, and i cnat relax knowing its there, so i keep on top of it.

which is probably why im so cross cause i feel like im half a load behind, as half a load is on top of the wardrobe GRRRRRR.

Had it been in basket, the whites would have been in the machine 1st thing in the morning and id have no outstanding washing

DH learnt very early on in our relationship, if it wasn't in the washing basket, it didn't get washed.

Rule still stands, 19 years later. I only wash things, that are clearly requested to be washed. I.E. in the basket.

Job done.

good idea maureen

BUT if you got 2 weeks worth of washing placed into your basket in one go would you just do it?

or would you think, that some of it had 'missed its chance' so to speak?

(I know OH will move stuff into laundry basket BUT I still do not intend to do it then either, its 'missed its slot' in the machine!)

Ah but YOU won't have any outstanding washing will you - your DH will

of course you're not being unreasonable, that i can tell from your OP

i've always been straight with DH - if he makes life much harder than it needs to be re: housework, he'll be the one that suffers. not that i wish to be malicious, but tbh, DH used to keep his clothes for the next couple of days in the side of his bed drawer - i got tired after a few weeks of having to look in there too for dirty clothes as well as the basket. so i stopped doing it. i'm happy to do the washing chore when i have time, but i'm not going to pander to his laziness / lack of organisation. if he has to go to work in a dirty shirt, then next time he'll remember. it worked out fine in the end - i think he ended up having to go to work twice in a couple of weeks in a crumpled shirt, he's never done it since

i'm happy to take on my share of the housework (50/50 since we both work the same hours and we BOTH hate doing the washing and putting it out, and all that faff). but i'm not going to go battling over stupid barriers that are put in place by DH - just as I wouldn't expect him to have to battle MY extra barriers if i put any in place. i should jolly well go to work with baby puke on once and that would snap me right out of it, wouldn't it!

otherwise the other person doesn't have any incentive to change - by saying 1 thing (i want you to do XYZ for me) and doing another (doing his washing too) you're just sending mixed signals.

just say no

doesn't have to be accompanied by shouting or moaning - just stop doing it, don't bother arguing, if he wants it to change, then he'll help you to help him :) and after all he might not actually be THAT bothered by having his clothes not washed. in which case you still win, because you still don't have to do the job.

his clothes, his responsibility, unless it's easy to put them in the wash along with yours/DCs.

No, I'll do it. But it's his sily fault if he's wearing dirty clothes for the 2 weeks prior to that!

W is for wife, not wench! Just like M is for Mother not maid! Same goes for DD and her washing. She is 15 though, not 5!

You sound perfectly reasonable to me, but I think I'd give up nagging him tbh as it clearly is not working and let him make the choice to have a vast collection of dirty clothes or start putting them in the basket to be washed of his own accord.

Make it very clear that you only do one white and two coloured washes per week though, so he and his towering heap of grubbies will just have to wait for the next washing slot.

Just do your stuff and whatever of his that will fit into one load (I'd probably be mean and leave his favourites dirty) and leave the rest and he will just have to wait for the next wash day for more clean stuff. If he doesn't like the inconvenience of not having all his lovely clean clothes done all the time then he shouldn't bloomin well leave them in inconvenient heaps on tops of wardrobes.

I've managed to train DH, but dd1(12) isn't quite there yet. She hangs onto her laundry for ages before putting it in the basket (that lives right outside her bedroom!). When she finally gets it in the basket I don't do extra washes to catch up, it gets done as and when. I refuse to put in extra effort because she can't be bothered to use the basket.

Funnily enough her favourite clothes always seem to be washed last.....

YANBU! I have this too. Dh leaves things that he "might wear again" on the floor (logical, really ) and gives me grief about sweeping them into the wash basket and washing them!

He comes home on a Friday with 4 days worth of gym gear (ewwwww!) in a bag (he goes to the gym at work) , so my wash basket goes from empty to full in the blink of an eye, which drives me nuts!!

I reckon it is like toddlers attention seeking behaviour, so I now try to not rise. I can actually annoy him more by washing the things (that way they are unavailable for him to wear) then when he is looking for them, I say "Oh- that shirt that was on the floor? I assumed you wanted it washed, otherwise it would have been nicely hung up"