I know I'm over sensitive to him - years of being the little sister and being tortured probably but we were quite close during my late teens/early twenties. He's 4 years older than me. He works as a business consultant and treats me and dh as a project, always making suggestions about our life etc
Him and his partner (male) live in New York but are coming to my parents for Xmas and to us on Christmas Eve. It was meant to be Boxing Day but it suited their flights better to leave then, meaning we're entertaining on 24th and 26th but I was happy to change arrangements for his benefit.
The problem basically is that he doesn't like children. He always says he likes them when they get older and more interesting but I'm still waiting for him to like ds who is 12 and extraordinarily like his uncle. He told me yesterday he's just going to give the dcs money and he's not giving anything to dd2 who is 6 months. He hates babies so I shouldn't be surprised by that. A cheap board book would do and I think vouchers are better presents than just money for the other two. He could do that online eg amazon. Dd1 is 9 and as I said ds is 12. It's not about the value of the gift. He's loaded but we're comfortable enough. It's the lack of thought or interest in my dcs.