To think this is too harsh a punishment for 5/6 year olds?

[TrappedinSuburbia]

Please tell me if you think I am being unreasonable, because if not, I am going to raise the matter with the school.

Ds was telling me about school and how one boy who was naughty missed out on his 'golden time' and had to sit at his desk (fair enough so far).

But not only do they have to sit at the desk, they have to sit with their head on the desk so they cannot see whats happening around them!!

I asked ds to demonstrate at dining table, so I asked him are you not allowed to look up? He says No, you can't look up until the teacher tells you, you can look up.

Opinions please...!

Altinkum - there are many many things that are done to children, that if they were done to adults would be unacceptable. This is not a yard stick we should be using.

Wintersnow - what the hell is there to 'freak out' about? A child sitting with his head on his arms? FGS

Altinkum - I know your nieces have had a difficult time of it (at home) and that they are currently living with you... so really, they aren't an ideal 'case in point' for 'normal' behaviour are they? The fact that she cried for 4 hours for being asked to sit properly on the chair shows that the child has a problem, not that the teacher was in the wrong.

Obviously I must be Barbarian Mum - it wouldn't bother me at all, so long as it didn't extend beyond 5/10 min.

It's a great way to get an over-excited child to calm down. It slows down their breathing, allows them to focus internally and achieve a bit more peace before being asked to rejoin the group.

For a couple of minutes it's fine.

glad I'm not the only one then! We had this at primary school - I can't remember feeling particularly humiliated about it! And maybe a wee bit of humiliation for a naughty child wouldn't be a bad thing any way!

Totally fair enough. Punishments are punishments.
It doesn't hurt them but it is something that they'll remember as not being particularly fun whilst simultaneously stopping them interacting with the rest of the class and causing further disruption.

For goodness sake, do people understand that the object of school is to educate your children? You do? So why do you think it's ok for this child to disrupt your child's education?

If you have no other issues with the teacher and you trust the environment and results obtained by the school (and hence you opted to send your child there) then have a bit of faith in the teacher.

Guantanamo Bay indeed! Wake up, of course it isn't!!!

Obviously a lot of posters here have no idea what goes on in schools - what a load of twaddle had been spouted here!
The whole point of Golden Time is that it is a privilege: a bit of time to choose what you do, relax and be rewarded for good behaviour. Children soon learn that losing GT is rotten, and they can be guided to make better behaviour choices thereafter.
Variously, I have seen children who have lost GT have to sit and look at a timer counting down the time they have lost; children sitting facing the wall; children sitting in the cloakroom with a teacher.
Most kids respond well to this; those who don't can then be referred on to the HT/DHT for extra help with behaviour.
Children need to learn that how they behave is their choice, and that poor choices have consequences.

I would just point out that if they don't want to miss golden time they should behave in a reasonable manner to get the treat.
I'm not sure why they don't want them to look-I would have thought that it was a good idea for them to watch and see exactly what they were missing.
It seems fair enough to me that children earn a free choice and that if they choose not to earn it they take the consequences.

Pisces - I think that would work if it was one way glass but when they are in the room they are just going to keep engaging the other children and messing about.

ChippingIn who are you to judge me on what I may or may not find an appropriate punishment for my kids?!
My 5 yr old daughter has golden time at school, it's half and hour where they get to choose what they want to do, if she was made to sit in the same position with her head on a desk for golden time without being allowed to look up/move then yes I absolutely would freak out.

I would simply tell mine-if you want golden time-earn it. DCs are very fair and if something is a priviledge they don't expect those who have been disruptive 'pains in the neck' to be given priviledges.

They do this at my ds school but its standing facing the wall with nose against the wall!

At DD's school they get sent out of the room or have to sit in the corner, both seem to work well as a punishment.

My DCs were sensible and didn't miss it! I don't see the need to get upset on their behalf-just tell them if they have any sense at all they won't let it happen again!

Surely missing golden time is punishment enough?

Do you want me to chuck in my fourpennorth about wondering where the credible research evidence is that golden time actually DOES work to improve behaviour in any case?

Cos I still haven't found any...

My ds teacher sets a timer and they have to do extra maths or similar until the timer goes off and then they can join in the play. Surely that is far more constructive. Being able to see everyone else having fun adds to the punishment really.

o op did your ds learn from his experience as my dc did?

Fuss about chuff all - grip needed. Can't look up [meh]

Wintersnow - who am I to judge? I am another poster on an open forum. If you don't want people to comment - don't say anything.... quite simple really.

It sounds perfectly all right to me. It's not much different from the naughty step etc which is used quite often with children of 3 or 4. And how is it humiliating?

I wasn't sure about the whole reward/golden time thing until my son was in Year 1 when two incidents brought it into sharp focus.

The class was being taught by a trainee teacher and the TA took it upon herself to take golden time from the whole class based on the behaviour of a few children. I have a big issue for all sorts of reasons which are not particularly relevant here. I spoke to the head who was very unhelpful but when I spoke, eventually, to the class teacher she was horrified. It turned out she had NEVER taken golden time away from a child.

She was also shocked by the behaviour of the class after this period with the trainee/TA and commented on how much the class had forgotten about behaviour. She was a lovely, gentle young woman who appeared to have the 'easy' group of the two. But subsequent to that it turned out that it was down to her management of the class that meant that the children were both well behaved and kind to each other.

My son is now 13 and I have had lots of experience with lots of different teachers and she still stands out even though, on the surface, there was nothing extraordinary about what she was doing.

Why on earth would you make extra maths a punishment? If ever there was a way to make children dislike maths even more, that would be it. And anyhow, my boys would regard it as a reward

Bonkers.

I really object to the cod psychology of it all. I want them to do things based on proper evidence.

Extra maths as a punishment?! I remember our games teacher saying that if we didn't get changed quietly we could do maths instead and I thought if only she meant it! I loved maths and hated games. I don't think that it is a good idea to view maths as a punishment.

It seems fair enough to me that those who have worked hard all week get time off and those who have been disruptive don't. Just tell your DC that they know the alternatives-it is their choice.