To expect 14 yr old DD to do some jobs around the house to earn pocket money?

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DD has never really been short of money, as her dad, my parents etc often give her a fiver here and there and she never really wanted to buy much. However, over the past year or so she has started to go out to the cinema, into town etc and therefore most of her money has gone (except the stuff in her building society). I have said I will happily give her an allowance, but in return would like her to:

keep her room reasonably tidy
put her laundry in the bin
wipe down the table after meals
help with cooking/cleaning when asked (and I wouldn't be unreasonable)

But she's not interested. My mum seems to think I'm being hard on her, but I think it's important for her to learn that there isn't a bottomless pit of money which is just there for the taking. AIBU?

My DGD (3 in December) has a small list of chores to do. She loves it. Makes her feel important.

My DGD 7 has been climbing up on my sink to clean my garden window since she was 3.

She takes all the plants down, cleans the two glass shelves, trims the plants (with grandads supervision) and puts everything back. Takes about one hour.

It's the highlight of her visit to Grandmas.

YANBU but I don't know how you have gone this long without her doing anything round the house and tbh I think you are going to have a right old battle trying to instigate it at this late stage.

Perhaps I am a complete slave driver but my DD is 2.5 and she puts her shoes on the shoe rack and hangs up her coat when we get home, she puts her laundry in the basket after her bath, 'helps' fold the laundry (pairing socks etc), puts away the cutlery from the dishwasher back into the drawer (current favourite thing) and tidies up her toys properly about once a week.

I prefer to see it as her learning important life skills rather than ruining her childhood . Everyone needs to learn to pick up after themselves as a bare minimum - does she genuinely not even pick up her own dirty socks? I'm pretty outraged that you've allowed yourself to be such a skivvy tbh!

I am not very good about getting mine to help. My 3 do very little compared to some of your lists.

they are meant to keep their rooms tidy and do a bit of cleaning up after evening meals. they don't do any ironing. They are 13, 15 and 16.

My ED does have a part time job and has 4 a levels so is very busy. They also travel a fair distance to their school but they are quite lazy and selfish at times.

OP, YANBU at all. DD (14) cleans her room and one of the bathrooms. She helps me with dinner a few times a week and I don't give her any pocket money. If she's going to the cinema or shopping with friends, she gets £20-30, but only if she's done her chores.