Leaving children in cars

[wintersnow]

Ok, firtly I haven't actually done this, I have just been talking to DH about it.

I said if the children were asleep and I needed to pop into the newsagents and was parked outside teh shop I would consider leaving them in the car, I remember this happening all the time when I was a child. DH was outraged! He said someone doing that would risk getting their children taken away from them by social servies and it's not the same as it was in the 80's when we were children what do you think?

If I was parked right outside and could see through the window then yes I would do it. It's not exactly the Bronx where I live. What does he think would happen?

is fine if the car is locked. window partly open if hot weather etc. just dont leave the key in the engine...

Yes we leave them in the car at the petrol station
it's more dangerous to take them with you and a pita for the person waiting behind you

I've done it a couple of times in the local garage with DD asleep in car seat. I take keys, lock doors & only do it if I can see her from inside the garage - ie if I don't consider there to be any risk of her being car jacked or snatched. Prefer not to though.

Well, I don´t think that yiu would have your children taken away!

But tbh I´d rather not do it unless it was an emergency.

If what I wanted could wait, then I wouldn´t do it.

What age are your DC?
I've done it.

I'd definitely leave vaguely sensible children in the car. I can't do it with dd2 because of her behaviour issues, but then I can't take her into shops either, so I just don't go shopping with her.

YANBU. My 18mo dd often falls asleep on the way from being out and about in the morning so I leave her in the parked car while I pop into nursery to get my son rather than waking her up. Only left for about 3 mins. I can't necessarily see her all the time but it is a wide street with loads of mums and dads walking past. Seems alright to me...

Depends on the circumstances doesn't it?

Like others have said, if you feel its safe then fair enough.

I've done it at petrol stations, outside shops for short periods. Usually I like to be in view unless its a quickie.

It's all about common sense isn't it?

My fear is that someone would try to nick the car and not see the sleeping child in the back. I cannot lock my car in that situation because locking it automatically puts on the car alarm, she stirs in her sleep and sets it off. This has happened. She woke up screaming.

I think it depends (amongst other things) on where you live. If I lived in a huge city I probably wouldn't. I live in a village and I regularly have done.

Its a really tricky one. The risk is that someone could steal the car or child inside (esp if cant lock it) or both. Therefore if you are in a quite, 'nice' area you know well and are only popping out for a few mins, it should be reasonably safe.

But then i always have that niggling thought........ is it ever worth taking the risk, however small it may be?

Mine are 7, 6, 4 and almost 3. I would never leave them for longer than a couple of mins and always try to keep my eye on the car the older two keep them all to the rules. Nobody undoes their seatbelts. npobody touches the doors. no fighting. No talking to anybody even if they come up to the windows..
I'd come flying out of the shop if I saw anybody neer the car (and have).. dragging four of them out of the car (in the rain) to stand in a queue for two mins seems insane... I may be shot down in flames.. but I've never felt they were at risk?

I do it daily, and yet all my children still live with me, despite having social workers in my family.

What does he imagine will happen to them?

I would if the car isn't likely to get stolen, I did on the army base for example as its unlikely anything will happen.

Outside the wire only at the petrol station where I can see the dc from the shop.
Never at the supermarket/ side of a busy road etc.

I was once walking home, I walked past the parade of shops, turned the corner on to the residential street and I walked passed a car with a tiny baby on the front seat in a rear facing baby seat, screaming it's head off. No adult in sight.

I stood there for a few minutes until a woman cam round the corner from the shops with a tesco bag. I explained that I had seen the baby alone and thought I better wait by the car. She said thank you and didn't looked worried in the slightest. That baby was out of eyesight and ear shot for a good few minutes, god knows how long she'd been there alone before i arrived.

Scary!

if you can lock the car, some window little down, and leave them in a place where either you or some bypassers will see them, for a few min is ok. Remember the case of a car being stolen, keys inside, open window, easy target, parked just in front of a nursery, mum was collecting her toddler (so just drop in take him and go out), with baby in the car!!!!!! the thief did not see the baby, well but he did a few minutes later and abandoned the car in the street, and police found it immediately. And if another case of a grandmother leaving her two grandchildren in the car sleeping to go to post office, she felt in the street, break a leg, they took her to hospital, and as she tried to talk about the children, but she could not make herself understood, by the time they found about about the children, they were dead, unfortunately it was the hottest day of the year, and the car was parked in the sunshine, no one saw or hear them. Always check that if the worst is to happen to you, there would be plenty of people to see them.

perfectly normal and reasonable. He has a very weird view of social services if he thinks they would take children off their parents for doing so. how odd.

Have you got a reliable link to that story, lydiamama? Because it sounds like an urban legend to me.

i thought that too.

Just never do it at the Fleet Services, because according to email spam stories, that place is a hot bed of car jacking/ gang initiation victim kidnappings.

Seriously though - I do leave DS in the car if I'm just popping to the cashpoint, into the petrol station or for one thing in the shop.

Car crime is pretty non-existant where I live and you'd have to be desperate to want to nick our car.

A woman at DDS school used to do it ALL the time and I got so close to reporting her...then another Mum had a word with her.

It's not ok at all. Takes seconds. It's not only the risk of kidnapping but of somehting appening with the car..electrical fault...another car bumping it...

Those are not Urban Myths...I remember them in the news.

But no links?

I do realise there are risks. A woman that my mum knew well lost two children who were playing on her driveway in the car and messed with the cigarette lighter years ago. She went to their funeral and has told me the story many times. But I just don't think that the risk from kidnappers/car-jackers is more than negligible.

Ive wondered about this. I wouldnt leave my handbag in the car on view, why would i leave my most treasured ds? Thing is, stopping at spar for milk, or at petrol station, what else can I do? Disturb sleeping child, unclip and reclip from carseat, often in the rain and cold, lug child inside for 2mins, struggle at til cos cant hold baby milk wallet and car keys? Gives me the heebies as to awful things that could happen, but have done it very few times now , for very short intervals and car parked in populated, lighted area. I wouldnt leave him if he was awake/crying. I have an old rubbish car that is not tempting to nick... but I live in a city. Its a worry. Since the last time I just opt to leave the petrol/milk etc until DH can watch DS. Do other people opt for the inconvenient, take no risks approach and lug baby inside? You dont tend to see people doing this, not in my area.