MIL buying dd something that we've already bought for xmas?

[LolaBellsAllTheWay]

Dd1 is a huge toy story fan and also loves to watch dvd's. She's dropped her nap but now has a quiet time in afternoon watching a dvd which is a god send as i can feed dd2 or do some housework etc.

She goes through phases with her dvds and watches the same one for weeks on end. Just now its beauty and the beast. So we bought her toy story 3 to be from santa.

MIL has told dp that she has also got a copy for her house. But she mentioned she'd bring it over at weekend for dd to watch.

We're on a tight budget this

Be honest with her. Tell her you have bought it for DD for Xmas and you would rather she kept her copy at her house for use after Xmas. Do you think she would accept that?

Oops, I didn't finish.

Yeah basically AIBU in asking her to put it away until xmas? she said to DP its for all the kids though, DD1 is oldest at 2.2yo then DD2 next oldest at 7mo!! can't see dd2 and the others being interested.

She knows I had bought it, but I know she loves getting stuff just for Granny's house! But surely she can just keep it till after xmas?

WE're on a tight budget so don't have a lot for xmas and I know that DD will be over the moon with this dvd, more than any other presents so I don't want that being ruined!

YANBU, tell her if it's for granny's house then it stays at granny's house, so no need to bring it over.

Have you explained that you won't be giving her your copy until Christmas?

I would think its totally reasonable to ask her to keep it at her house til after Xmas. Its probably a good time to set up a line of communication between you where she CHECKS with you first, before making any kind of purchase, in case this sort of overlap happens again.

Yes she knows this, in fact she was with me when I preordered it!

In all she is a fantastic MIL but she just like to go OTT with DD1, I think she's really shooting herself in the foot as she has 5 other DG's.

For DD1's last birthday we were still struggling a bit and will be until my mat leave ends next year (essentials paid but cutting back on luxuries so not exactly struggling but YKWIM) so not a lot was spent but she was only 2. MIL arrives and showers DD with gifts, I was bit put out as she knew what we were getting. She did say, oh but its for her birthday and christmas but has since rhymed off a fair few things she has bought her for christmas. She then said I haven't got your DD2 much as DD1 has it all anyway. True, but in that case stop buying so much for DD1.

I'm actually just waiting on it becoming an issue with the SIL's.

x-posts AphraBen, its already an issue! :)

return your copy? or tell her she can play her copy after xmas.

YANBU, as great as MIL's can be why do they do things like this? Just tell her the situtaion. TBH she is your child and people should consult with you first before buying presents as you may not want your child to have said present or you may have already bought it yourself.

Please just be honest and explain. Hopefully she will be very understanding and either keep it until after Christmas or agree to change it for something else. If she doesn't know, she really can't do the right thing. She sounds rather nice so do give her a chance.

Well this is the thing, we have a fairly small house and the toys are actually coming out from all corners.

Is it rude to ask people not to buy the DD's toys. i would rather get them toys from Santa then perhaps clothes from elsewhere but I know that sounds so ungrateful. But DD1 honestly has so much toys that she had forgot she has most of it!

I have hinted to a few family members that things like paint/play doh etc would be great as thats more really replenishing things as they run out!

I would be honest with MIL and tell her that money is tight at the moment and this is your daughter's main present and you don't want her to see it before xmas. Tell her you def don't want the dvd brought to your house and if she doesn't hide it away when you are visiting before xmas then you won't be visiting her.
It sounds a mean thing to do to me. You don't go around buying new toys etc for kids just before Christmas, esp if you know their parents are buying it for them for xmas.