to think that this was a bit of a daft reply?

[CrazyPlateLady]

Someone I know is pregnant. She has posted a picture of the nursery online. It is her first and she is very excited. I am really happy for her as it is something she has desperately wanted for ages.

However, the crib has a bumper in and I pointed out, in a nice way, that they aren't recommended for babies under a year as they can get trapped. I know, I know, I may be being a bit PFB myself but I just don't like the idea and I have heard a few sad stories where babies have suffocated because they have become trapped under cot bumpers. I would never have forgiven myself if any similar sort of thing happened to my friend and I had just said nothing.

Her reply was "yeah I know but it looks cute and my friend told me to just keep checking."

I know she is excited and obviously doesn't want to be thinking of horrible negative things but if you are aware of the risk (and it seems like she is), surely it is madness to think (and for this friend to advise) that you justs keep checking? Baby would have to be checked on constantly which obviously isn't going to happen.

Unless you never ever sleep, how can you keep checking? How about saying "Yes it looks really cute in your picture, now take it off and put it away nice and safe until the baby is a year old"

She is excited. When baby is here and she loves him/her she might change her mind.-

And once they're a year old, you're not meant to have them as they can use them to climb out of the cot and fall! It's one of those products that you buy because they look cute then never use. She'll probably work it put when it gets closer to the time, or when she's faced with an actual live baby. And if not, then it's her choice really (and the risks aren't enormous really anyway).

I think that it'll play on her mind too much, and as soon as her OH hears about your comment, which I'm sure he will do - he'll get her to remove it if she doesn't do herself first. BUT, while there's no baby and a brand new nursery - it looks CUTE - and maybe one of her friends bought it for her who is on FB and she had it on to look cute for the pictures but will whip it off as soon as the baby comes home....

Maybe you can call her or send her an email and explain that it's unlikely she'll be checking every 2 seconds?

My mum kept on about me having one, she had one on the cot at her house which I took off every time Ds went down for a nap there. Just didn't understand the risk and kept telling me how she had 3 kids her mum had 5 and everything was fine blah blah blah

I put the bumpers on the cot before DS was born as they had been a gift and they looked nice. I removed them when he outgrew his moses basket and went into the cot. Maybe this is what your friend will do. Baby could be in a basket for months before this becomes an issue.

Fwiw, I think you should keep your opinions to yourself when it comes to things like this because you're more likely than not to be seen as interfering.

I think that advice has been changed and now there's thought to be no additional risk by using one. I removed ours because it was too much hassle putting it back in place whenever I changed the sheets, not because I thought there was any danger. Let her enjoy her perfect nursery for now, she'll soon drop things that look cute when she has the sleepless nights and exhaustion to cope with.

I suppose she meant checking that the ties etc are secure not that her baby has suffocated. I'm sure she is aware that babies should be checked cot bumper or not. It probably hasn't crossed her mind that they are dangerous as lots of shops sell them & most bedding sets include them. I agree with the previous posters that she will probably work out for herself that they aren't practical (& are potentially dangerous for wriggly babies) but it's up to her what she does or doesn't do. YABU to think everyone should do as you do.