to think that a 4 year old shouldn't gave to do homeowrk?

[amijee]

Wasn't sure to post here or education section.

My ds1 has just started reception and has been coming home with some of his school books. He is a bright kid so I just thought they were for parents to see what he has been up to at school. Neither myself not DH had been working on it with him (but we do lots of reading - fact and fiction)as we thought it was the school's role to teach him to read and write.

Now, we are being told that he is "falling behind" on his sounds and blending. I know he is a bright kid so I am assuming we are the only parents that are not doing formalised "homework" with him. I obviously feel bad about this and have started doing so now....but deep down I do not think it's right to have these sorts of pressures on a 4 year old when there is a whole lifetime of hard work ahead of him! Of course I would like my children to be a success in life but I can't remember having homework until I started secondary school ( but still did well at achool)

Or am I just being unreasonable ( or lazy)?

My DD1 is in school nursery now (she's 3 and a half), and each week we get a sheet which goes over what the kids are doing in class that week, and what we can to support them.

This week it's talking about how things look different in the dark. I usually try and do what is suggested but sometimes forget to. It's not formal homework though.

DDs have a set of ORT books and DD1 is learning to read. It only takes 10 mins a day which doesn't seem too much to me. She still has plenty of time to do other 'kid' stuff and spends most of her time at nursery playing.

My DD is in reception. Although she has been progressing have thought it was at a very slow pace. Have found spending 5-10 mins a day with her has brought her on leaps and bounds and given her more confidence. Don't really see it as homework. We used to read a book or two together in the afternoon anyway. Now she reads to me. Definitely think it's worth it.

DD1 is in Reception and has the following she is supposed to do each night:-

Read a book usually 10 or so pages with a sentence on each page.

Play 'Word Bingo' for 5-10 minutes (basically key word flash cards as a bingo game)

CVC words - cards with a constenant or a vowel on to make up words like D-O-G or C-A-T

She also has a handwriting practice book, and has phonics letter sheets that need colouring in and the letter written out multiple times. Then there's the weekend homework like a bug hunt where you draw our finds.....

She's 4.8y/o and I really don't think she needs to do 40-60mins of homework a night. I don't have time to do an hour of homework a night with her as I've got tea to make and a toddler and a pre-schooler to deal with/entertain too.

Do people really do an hour of homework with their 4y/o?

wow truthsweet that's a LOT!!!

ds1 is at st andrews and all he gets is a reading book which he is allowed to change when he likes
and the occasional extra bit of homework

OP, i agree with you! they're at school all day, i fail to see why they can't teach them to read and write. tho i have been flamed for saying this on here before

I really think they need to get back to basics and instead of teaching them about labelling parts of a bloody flower (in reception!!) they ought to be concentrating on reading and writing and basic mathmatics

while I am absolutely there to "support" his learning, i don't feel that after a full day at school they need to come home to even more school work
home should be for relaxing and spendng time with family... not for doing things they could be taught at school

Practising reading and sounds is pretty much the norm as far as homework goes in reception. IMO they are fine. I don't think reception should be doing other homework personally though.

However hearing your child read or going through sounds for 5 minutes each day I think is acceptable - infact I think it is pretty much essential

"we thought it was the school's role to teach him to read and write. "

Try and see it as a joint project. Treat it like other things - learning to play the piano or learning to drive a car. You have formal lessons and then go away and practise your skills away from the formal environment. The more practise you put in outside the formal environment the more likely you are to learn and retain the newly aquired knowledge and skills. The same goes for reading - in school they learn the sounds (the skills) and then they can go home and practise applying them through daily reading. If you practise regulalry with him, he will generally pick it up quicker.

" fully accept that what is done at home enhances school work but in my day it was never done"

Really? I can remeber bringing flashcards and reading books home from school from the start and I am 37y, so a whileback now. And that was from avery typical state primary on council estate, not some posh academic private school.

Truthsweet - that's about the amount of homework that DS gets as well. I think it's far, far too much.

He was crying, proper tears, and saying "no, no" tonight, as we had to practice his handwriting/letters/sounds.

He's exhausted after school - he's only been there, what? 8 weeks? It's a big change for him.

I don't know what to do, I don't want him to fall behind, but a 4yr old shouldn't be getting that upset over homework, surely. He's not even very good at it!

We read for pleasure here, so I don't class it as homework.

However, I am working with my child just 10 mins a day on writing and basic phonics. It's made a world of difference. My child is 4 too.

But I won't go over the 10 mins allocated unless the child is okay to do so. Some days they do get really tired so we skip a day, but 10 mins most days isn't much is it?

Ask the teacher what they expect of you. They may think as he's bright, he'll just catch up when ready - but you do need to find out what the teacher wants you to do in terms of homework.

theQuibbler, i wouldn't make him do it

we had this a few times with ds1 over his reading book, and i just didn't push it

i don't want him to hate doing work and to resent it, and they won't do it or learn from it if they are upset and unwilling

"I wonder if there is any correlation between doing homework at four and being a high achiever in one's later life. Doubt it."

Actually homework has been shown to be of little, if any, benefit to younger children so you're right there. It's only once children get older that it's greatly beneficial, and even then only certain types of homework are useful - other types are completely counter-productive.

Unfortunately I don't have my book home with me so I can't give you the exact figures/reference, but I'll look it up when I remember.

The book does mention, however, that parents perceive schools who give lots of homework to be 'better' somehow, and that schools accordingly give larger amounts of homework to placate parents.

I know for a fact that my school is quite happy for teachers to simply provie 'busy work' rather than anything that actually enhances learning, in order to keep the parents off their backs. I refuse to do that as I think it's unprofessional and I'll happily take the slack for it.

/rant :)

YANBU. Homework for a four-year-old is insane, even if it does help with their reading. They have years to improve on that. It's madness. Who came up with that idea??

Idf they are crying over it, stop and don't do it that night. Try again briefly the next day. At 4y don't force them. If the refusal or tears continue go and speak to the teacher.

I am quite suprised at how many people count reading practise as homework TBH.

I think at 4 it's OK to read with your child - you can make it part of the evening routine, child on lap, book, bit of reading/blending sounds etc. And of course reading to your DC at bedtime has a huge influence - it makes them see reading as something that is fun and to be desired.

But no more than that. I think UK schools give far, far too much homework. And no, there is very little correlation between homework in primary and academic achievement later on. I went to school in Holland and had no homework till secondary (Yr7) - it was eased in over the first term, we all got used to it quickly and that was that.

The feedback I get fromt eachers though is that it's the parents who want homework - as proof that their DCs are actually learning something, or whatnot? I think the problem is that teachers aren't respected in terms of their professional competence, parents seem to think they know best what their child 'should' be doing and it's all become a vicious circle.

Truthsweet and Quibbler - am shocked at the amount of homework your DCs have to put up with - are they at seriously academic private schools? My older DD is in Yr 5 and doesn't get homework every night (yet). And I think that's fine. I'm also determined that their childhoods won't suffer, so I will rebel if I think they're getting too much.

Hulababy - I don't count reading to the DDs as homework it's the practicing sounding out/blending sounds/key word recognition that DD1 has to do that make it home work.

PointyThings - No DD1 goes to the local primary which is rated 'Good' by OFSTED no high flying prep for my children

TIY - They are very keen on homework at DD1's school we get an A5 sheet each weekend with reminders of what we need to do and tasks for the weekend. At first we tried to do it but I'd much rather DD1 came home and was a little girl and played for an hour or so before tea/bed than I cracked the whip over her to write out a page of ABCs plus weekends are (mostly) family time. She's got time enough for hours of homework at secondary. I wish we only had a book every few days like your DS1.

just to reiterate dont force it. we were told in reception that DS1 was falling behind with his "reading". he got upset if we tried to do his school book at home so we didnt force the homework issue and we never wrote in his reading record either. we did read lots of other books/ signs/recipes etc instead and we bought books he seemed interested in ( factual with good pictures).

he is now 7 and has a reading age of 9 (whatever that means). it suddenly clicked for him and he hasnt looked back with no pressure from us.

I think no homework until secondary school is an ecellent idea. I cant but think that by making 4/5/6 year olds read because they have to every night is not the way to amke grown ups that like to read for pleasure

I'm really glad I am not the only Mum like this. My ds1 started reception this Sept and we had parents' evening last week. I basically felt like the teacher was telling me that he's a really bright kid, but he's far behind other kids who have more support at home. I always let him play at home, and haven't done writing practise or number practise, though we do talk about sounds, play 'I spy' etc. as we are 'on the go'.

I've started now, as I don't want him to be behind. But I do resent it, and wish we lived in a country where kids don't start school till older. I want him to have a fun childhood! He is shattered after school, but we still have reading books and writing practise to do. (That's while I'm cooking and taking care of my 2 year old twins). My ds1 is a November birthday, but he's quite 'young' and just loves his play, has bad fine motor skills (so writing is v hard for him). I blame 'the system' and other pushy parents, not the teachers. So, am trying to find the balance of supporting him without making it too onerous.

I suppose it really depends on what you class as homework. If you read to your children regularly anyway and show them how to sound out words etc then you aren't really doing anything different.

I don't think it has to be about forcing children to learn to read - most children enjoy being read to and if they have enough exposure to it then they'll pick up a lot anyway and it won't be a chore - it will just be fun.

TBH I find it a bit strange that people avoid certain areas such as reading and writing because they think it is the school's responsibility to teach those particular subjects. It's just wasting those early 'sponge-like' years IMO when they just love learning new things.

I've just come back to this thread and really glad others feel the same.

I think it is a sad reflection of our society that we have to be so competitive and pushy. I can't see why reading and writing is such a race - in many countries childen don't even start school until they are 5 or 6.

But I can also see that of I don't "keep up with the Jones's" my son may suffer if he falls behind and stops enjoying learning.

I have the most amazing son who asks how clocks work and what causes lightning and I have had to get science books out of the library to explain it all to him and he gets it. Yet because I am not reinforcing his sounds and blending, I am made to feel like a parent that doesn't do her bit!

Well why can't you incorporate the sounds and blending when you are reading the science books to him? You don't have to sit with flashcards for x minutes each evening to teach him - in fact that may completely switch him off the entire idea! :) Just find a way to connect it to something he is interested in and then it becomes fun rather than a chore.

It must be very hard with 3 children under 5 I agree. I do think its important/normal to get your son to read to you for 10 mins each day though (including practicing sight words/letter sounds). Parental support will really help him blossom and improve confidence in his own abilities! My one just loves reading about funny slimey monsters/adventures and is often found curled up with a book these days. Try a timer and use rewards at first maybe if he is less keen.

No offense SBP, but does that not make it seem like a chore rather than the pleasure it could be? I don't think children should be forced to sit and read..I think they should WANT to read. If you can find a subject that interests them - be it reading a recipe from a cookery book as they help you make dinner or bake cookies, or reading the instructions in a craft book or even reading the back of a cereal packet then it becomes something that they actually want to do instead of something they HAVE to do. I actually think that is a big problem with education these days.

Ds started school when he was 4 and has always had homework, he likes practising and showing me what he can do, it does help him and reinforces what the teachers are doing, a lot of the homework is fun things as well. It gives him more confidence in class when it comes to going over the reading or whatever the homework has been.

Quibbler - on the couple of occasions the homework has seemed far too much or ds has become upset, I have just left it, they are just little children at the end of the day and too young to get the pressure heaped on them, I would definetly be speaking to the school about that amount of homework!

OP, I do agree that I was shocked that ds had homework at all in primary 1, he is now in primary 2, and I was of the same attitude that it was the teachers job and they spent enough time learning at school, but its a period of adjustment for you both and i've seen how much it benefits ds's learning in the long run.

My DD started school as a young 4 year old. She was exhausted when she came in (and this was a child used to going to full time nursery). Trudging through the ORT book was a hideous chore, and took time away from being read to and enjoying books.

Some nights I have sat down with her and gone through some letter sounds etc but only if she has been in the mood.

After a year in school she now likes "writing" for pleasure but I would never insist she does it.

I've just kept in the back of my head the thought that they don't even start school until 7 in many other countries... Yes, she is a bit behind, but I am sure she won't be in the long run.

Bugger timers/stickers/rewards.

PS I am a teacher.

Thats just exactly it nonnomum, they will all get there in the end, no point making them miserable in the process.

My 12 year old stepson is testament to how important those first years are. Technically there is nothing wrong with him, he doesn't have any learning disability but he is a special unit because he had a lot of operations during his early school years and missing out on that vital learning has made him have similar problems to dyslexics.

It's vital that children learn the stuff that doesn't seem important to some of you during that year. It's vital that we back it up at home. This is the foundation to all of their learning, if they miss out on this they will suffer for it for the rest of their school years and beyond.

Homework is not hard at that age, my daughter has a book with no words she has to read to us and she has to learn all the letter sounds and numbers (which she's been working on since July, so it's not been the alphabet in a week). Get them into the habit of doing homework whilst it's easy and fun, get them into the habit of reading every day.