to decide that either DS eats only biscuits from now on or DH cooks

[granted]

Am fuming. DS (4) has this week been point blank refusing to taste any meals I've cooked, saying he hates them (even when they're stuff he loves) and instead filling up on biscuits he's nicked from the kitchen/sisters, crisps, creal etc likewise.

Tonight I said I was going to put his dinner in the bin and that he could live off biscuits entirely in future. OK, not the most grown up response, but I was fed up.

BUT DH then intervened, shouting at me in front of DS, saying what lousy parent I was etc etc.

I've now had enough. Said DH can cook DS's packed lunches/dinners and experience the joy of him refusing to eat them.

I don't mind DS's behaviour so much - v infuriating, but I know it's a phase, done to get attention, he's 4 etc.

But absolutely livid with DH.

He seems to think I'm joking about the cooking - that's it's some kind of point-scoring threat. It's not.

Why the hell shouldn't he make the food and see how much he likes it for a change? He says DS will get taken away by social services if we make him live off biscuits. In practice, I would imgine after about a day and a half of freely available biscuits and nothing else, DS would start nicking carrots etc in desperation - he normally has a pretty healthy diet and eats most stuff.

Men. Grr.

YANBU.

After nine years of doing 75% of the domestic chores and around 60% of childcare, I flipped my lid last week.

Dh has done an amazing job of looking after me and dd as I had a breakdown 3 weeks ago, but now I am a little bit more stable, he obviously thought that it was back to business as usual and I was back in my old role. I wouldn't be surprised if it had helped contribute to my breakdown.

I lost it.

I said 'I cannot do this anymore, I will not do this anymore, I am fed up, you leave everything to me I am fucking sick of it and it is finished with. We will have a rota. The rota will change and be negotiated, but it will be one that works for us and that does not include me doing everything as usual while you sit on your arse and watch.'

He knows I'm right, even if he doesn't like it. When the dust settled, he apologised and we did the rota. Largely due to his guilt, the rota currently consists of him doing washing, ironing, washing up, vacuuming, and cooking. Some other stuff 50 / 50 eg picking up dog poo in the garden etc. My jobs include cleaning bathroom, dusting and cleaning kitchen surfaces.

Have I butted in to his jobs? Have I helped him out (the way he hardly ever did with me?) Have I fuck.

sorry meant to add rota is the way to go!

YABU of course its not acceptable to let your children live off biscuits and if tried to do so even for a short period of time you would be being a bad parent.

You may be taking thread title a bit too literally there numotre. I don't think OP is really considering making her ds eat biscuits for the rest of his life.

Love it nemofish.

YANBU
And if if you were BU, DH should have talked to you about it in a reasonable way and when your DS wasn't around instead of undermining you and in a shouty way too.
Your approach might well work and even if it doesn't, no harm done.

YANBU if my DD isn't going through one phase, she's going through another She turned 3 few months ago and has since been really picky about food, it's infuriating, not least because I used to often go to bed hungry at her age because there wasn't much to eat. And now I'm scraping an entire plate of perfectly good, untouched food into the bin that DD would have eaten, no problem, just a week before

Your DH is being an arse by having a go at you, especially in front of DS. He's making it a much bigger issue than it really is. All children try it on don't they? It's in their DNA

Your dh should have supported you. But it's not his fault that ds will only eat biscuits.

You need to calm down then explain to dh what exactly you find so soul destroying about making an effort with food that's constantly rejected.

It is only a phase but it is one that your dh needs to help you to deal with, and if that means cooking some of the food then that's what if should do. There's only so many dinners that you can throw in the bin without losing your rag.

Yanbu at all, let your dh see how soul destroying it is to have your lovingly prepared meals turned down all the time! Ignore Numotre's comments as she/he has missed the point of your post; nobody thinks you are actually considering making your child live off junk.

YABU in the way that you reacted to your DS. You are the adult and need to show that. Your DH is also BU though and should never have talked to you that way.

Sounds like you need a long chat about how you will deal with DS's eating so that you can present a united front. I would start by banning crisps/biscuits etc between meals and if his sisters are giving them to him, stop them from having them as well.

YANBU. I totally agree that your DH should try it for a while and that he was U for shouting at you.

What I tend to do when 2yo DS is being a twat picky about food is I buy him M&S ready meals or use Ella's Kitchen squirty pouches on pasta so that I don't care so much when he flings it at the wall.

I'm with pozzled here. You over-reacted to DS's refusal to eat and you know that really, don't you? You, your DH and your DDs enjoyed your meal and appreciated it surely? Feeling quite so angry is a bit OTT. Put the biscuits/crisps and other junk where he can't just help himself. If the DDs can't be trusted not to slip him what he wants then deny them snacks too or make it so they have to ask, not just take, and tell them they have to eat whatever they've asked for in front of you. Don't get worked up, continue to put DS's meals in front of him and if he doesn't eat, just throw it away and say nothing. He'll soon eat when he's hungry. Your DH had no right to berate you in front of your DS though, that is well out of order!

I agree with thelibster.

If DS doesn't eat, I leave it covered on kitchen side to eat or heat and eat when he says he's hungrey. Other than that theres fruit if he wants it.

Lock the cupboards. DD1 age 3 is doing this all the time. She helped herself to 4 yougurts at lunch time and this evening I'd just put supper in the oven (chicken casserole, it wasn't that nice)and walked into the sitting room to find her sat in the middle of the floor eating a HUGE bowl of breakfast cereal that she'd nicked from the kitchen whilst I was in there and I hadn't noticed, milk and everything. Unsurprisingly she wasn't hungry at meal time. Grr