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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think colic isn't funny

12 replies

rpickett · 20/11/2010 17:32

I'm so pissed of but maybe IABU so I thought I'd put it to the MN jury before I react.
My 2 week old daughter has bad colic at the moment, both my boys had it and it's horrible for me watching her in pain, I had no remedies in last night as it was the first nigh and to be honest I wasn't expecting it while she is so young as my boys were both a few weeks older.
Last night she was up from 7pm-3am screaming in pain and although I managed to settle her in the end (thank you so much to my next door neighbour for bringing around some gripe water at 11pm) I am shattered.
Today I planned to go to see my mum and didn't want to change me plans due to lack of sleep so went anyway and my life I regret it now.

All she did was bitch and moan at me about every aspect of my life (I'm lazy for asking DH to hoover even though when I asked I'd only given birth 48hrs beforehand etc) and when she commented on the fact I looked tired I told her about DC's lack of sleep due to colic and she thought it was funny saying "hahaha good now you know how I felt" and it "serves me right for having another baby" all because she went through it with me and my sister as babies and this is apprently my pay back for making her suffer Hmm

I'm so angry with her for finding her GD's pain so funny but maybe I'm BU due to lack of sleep, I just found the entire visit hardwork and felt constandly undermined and to be honest I'm wondering if I should even bother keeping a relationship up with her for the skae of the DC's if she thinks it's funny when they're in pain.

OP posts:
Original poster
rpickett · 20/11/2010 17:37

sake not skae.

OP posts:
eachpeach80 · 20/11/2010 17:46

YANBU. She was being very insensitive. Maybe she was trying to make light of it IYKWIM but either way YANBU to feel angry and upset. On it's own though I don't think this would justify cutting her off. Hope that things get better soon.

SirBoobAlot · 20/11/2010 17:51

She sounds like a bitch, to be honest.

There are a lot of people on here who have struggled through the nightmare that is colic. Feel free to rant any time you need to - though maybe avoid your mother.

Gimmepeace · 20/11/2010 17:56

No YANBU! Your mum sounds pretty bitchy and not much help to a new mum. Surely she would know that new mums need SUPPORT not people laughing at whats causing them distress? You'd think you could at least rely on some support and a hug from your own mum Angry

Rannaldini · 20/11/2010 17:57

Have you taken her to the doctor? It might be something else and perhaps a good idea to get her checked over. I know you say your other children had colic but it's worth a trip.
Crying from 7pm to 3am isn't typical for colic, she and you must have been absolutely exhausted.

I think you are overtired though and being unreasonable

BornAgainBokononist · 20/11/2010 18:03

Colic is not funny, it is as close to hell as you can get IMO!
Ds had it from 2 weeks til 5 months, have you tried cranial massage? It helped us. I fyou've been through it before have you got lots of tips as I have a long list of things I tried?

sparkle101 · 20/11/2010 18:41

Maybe your mum was trying to lighten the mood and keep your mind off it, it also maybe that she's forgotten how bad it was - otherwise she wouldn't have had more children,

Agree with Rannaldini though. Have you taken her to the doctors? It could be reflux rather than colic - my daughter had this since day 4 and still has it now but is having treatment. I remember the days before it was diagnosed..... sleep deprivation - form of torture!

Good luck.

Fontsnob · 20/11/2010 19:23

Just had cranial massage on dd for her reflux and so far it's worked a charm so IMO it is definitely worth a try. YANBU by the way and your dm was being a cow!

Original poster
rpickett · 20/11/2010 19:42

Thanks everyone, I thought maybe IABU due to sleep deprevation but at least I now know I'm not the only person who thinks she was being a bitch.
I would like to think she was joking/making light but unfortunatly my mum doesn't make jokes and the look on her face confirmed she was serious. She doesn't see any harm in critising me in front of my DC's and thinks it's funny that I don't like her undermining me.
I haven't been to the dr's as yet as the gripe water did settle her in the end but I am taking her on monday (unrelated) so will talk to them then.
I am looking into cranial massage at the moment, it's only something I've heard of on here very recently so definatly something to consider.

OP posts:
Firawla · 20/11/2010 20:16

i would see a lot less of her if that is how she is, sounds like you dont really need that at the moment, so just keep her more of an arms length

saffy85 · 20/11/2010 20:23

YANBU I hated watching my DD go through it too. Although it turned out to be severe constipation in the end and once it was sorted DD and I were both transformed! Felt so helpless for first 5 weeks though.

How in the name of arse is colic funny? Your mum sounds like a bitter old cow imo. If my mum or anyone else had spoken to me like that especially after a rough night like you obviously had, I'd have flounced walked out.

SkyBluePearl · 20/11/2010 21:12

Colic is a nightmare! She (like your DH) should be supporting and helping where possible. If she makes any negative comments in person/on the phone just say goodbye and tell her if she cant be supportive then you don't have time for her.

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