to BLOODY HATE the 4 hours between school pick up and bedtime

[superv1xen]

i am knackered from a day of cleaning. which no one will even notice apart from me

DD (18 months) is whinging, DS (4) is chasing her round teasing her which makes her squeal earsplittingly. he will not shut up chattering and asking me endless pointless questions and demanding stuff like, whats for dinner, can i have a drink, what are you doing? and wanting to have the telly on (er no DS i am trying to cut it down as its all you sodding do!and when it is on you don't sit still and watch it so whats that bloody point)

soon i will have to do them dinner which DD will probably throw half of all over my mopped shiny kitchen floor and DS will say he wanted something different (TOUGH!)

i have also got to think about what to do for mine and dp's dinner and also go out to sainsbury's when dp gets here to get cakes to give to DS's school tomoro for them to sell for children in need. and i have got to think of something for him to wear tomorrow as they have got to wear "something spotty" again for children in need. which i will have to also buy from sainsburys as he has nothing spotty.

aaargh

If you are spending ALL day cleaning you are cleaning too much. You need to ease off and get some you time during the day.

it is not called the arsenic hour for nothing

have a gin

ok i have not spent the WHOLE day cleaning, maybe 4 hours cleaning, and the rest looking after DD and mumsnetting and facebooking

it needed it though, i try and leave it but it just gets me down if its messy and i can't relax :(

i havent got use of a car in the day, i could have got the bus into town but its £4 plus its bloody freezing and i didnt fancy going out in it.

i need a fag but DS will see me and go on about it. and then i will feel guilty. who needs an anti smoking coach when i've got him as my conscience

I thought it was only me that felt like this! From 3.30 til 8.30(when oldest one goes to bed) I dont get a minute to myself. Have to prepare dinner(1 meal for all and if they dont like it-tough! learned that the hard way!),serve it,wash all dishes,mop floor(why oh why do kids insist on spilling most of their tea?), do homework,bath them,read bedtime stories.make youngests bottle and finally get into bed for a cuddle.
Also my dh doesnt get home til later so also has to then clear up the mess that he leaves(dirty clothes,dishes etc).
By 9pm I am done in!

TBH you sound too busy to be going shopping just for cakes. Don't bother with it

YANBU.

I feel the same today, and I also suspect that the tidying I fought so hard to acheive around my toddler will go un-noticed. Mostly because between the two of them, in the 20 minutes we have been home, my daughters have spread books, coats gloves and shoes throughout the house. And I have to get the baby off to sleep so I can make dinner.

I'm also going to be organising spotty outfits for tomorrow, but if I can't find anything in their cupboards I am going to take a marker pen to something plain!

And cant you just get a white t shirt and draw dots on? What if you didn't have the money for dressing up stuff? Schools making assumptions that everyone has time and can afford all their ideas just causes more stress than it's worth.

It's sooooo reassuring to read this.

I'm normal!

I think I can squeeze in another 10mins of ignoring my children Mumsnetting before I cannot get away with delaying supper further.

YADNBU

I'm right there with you!

Mine usually come home from school tired and objectionable too, which is nice on top of everything else.

I know what you mean about wanting to relax in a clean house etc but you REALLY are wasting 4hrs of your life spending it cleaning when you've got a toddler and a 4yr old

What is the point?!

1hr a day max. Just do the essentials - the ins and outs - and make the beds etc

I know it's hard, I know, because of having cared for my three lovely and very boisterous neices when their mum wasn't well - it's the hardest, hardest work I have ever done (and I've had some hard jobs) , but do try and count your blessings!

I'd give anything for child but I keep miscarrying.

Am sorry for you, hairytriangle

There is a wanky poignant poem that's been posted on MN before about leaving the housework etc because they're only little for such a tiny amount of time

I make myself think of it often

You utter cow.

Four hours between end of school and bedtime?

I should be so lucky!

super- YANBU. I'm in the same boat. I love and adore my children, as we all do, but sometimes I think they are instruments of torture. We get home at 3.30pm, they make demands on me, I feed them, help DS1 with reading, DS2 nods off mid dinner but we can't put him to bed until 9pm or he'll be up at 5am. DS1 goes to bed at 7 after a guaranteed 15 minute tantrum about nothing.

Don't feel guilty about having leisure time in the day when other people are at work. When their day is over, you're still going strong!

My DH works 5 days a week 9-6 and I work 7 days a week,24 hours a day including night time stand by for kids who wake up. If you want to Facebook and Mumsnet for a bit in the day, go ahead and dson't feel guilty.

:o

don't buy the spotty clothes!!!

I will just put stripy clothes on my DC

I mean, WTF, who tells us that we need to buy something as pointless as spotty clothes. How many boys have spotty clothes?!

Sodding charity. I'll bake the effing cakes, that should be enough!

Am sick of this type of fund raising, I prefer just donating money (which we do every month by standing order).

Forget sainsbo's. Put some pasta on, or a baked spud, and pour yourself a drink!

Oh, and it gets better. Mine 5 and 7 now and it' s a world of difference! You're doing the hardest bit now.

What Valhalla said!

At least little children go to bed and let you have a bit of an evening.

I am subjected to MTV (old gimmer emoticon) Electric guitar playing, Black fucking ops, turning their nose up and demanding Chinese for dinner, muddy school shoes, horrendous bedrooms, and constant texts and phone calls from their millions of mates who they adore more than me or their Dad.

I cant even reach for the sherry as I'll be taxiing from 5.10 till 8 pm.

Boarding school is the way forward.

Thanks notnowbernard (I am intrigued by your name!)

Yes, my brother's MIL (lovely woman) has a fridge sticker along the lines of 'mums with messy houses have happy children'.

:)

YANBU OP! I feel exactly the same way. Once it hits 4pm I feel done in (2 DS's 2.8y & 6 months). The noise, demands etc are relentless.

oh chandon, when did it get better????????????????????????
PLEASE say 4 and 2

It's about prioritising. Forget the crap about cakes and spotty clothes if it means you are so frazzled that you can't enjoy your son when you do have him home. Your DS only gets one childhood and these days that you have with him are the memories he will have for life, and it's a shame to be frazzled and hating your time with him when you could cut out the unimportant stuff and concentrate on him.
It's all about priorities imo.
FWIW when we had the spotty clothes request I just put spots on an old t shirt with felt pen. Everybody's appy.

This may make you laugh a little. I'm not totally naive and have had various caring for / babysitting duties for years.

However, my SIL was very ill for a bit so I had her three neices (then 4, 6 and 7) quite a lot.

I'd also go over after work a lot and help with tea, homework, bath and bed routine to give my SIL a bit of feet up time.

I was thoroughly knackered each time and I'm used to working a high profile job, with lots of responsibility, but caring for the neices was more knackering than anything I've ever done.

decided to take them to cinema, and thought I'd take the youngest two to the pick n mix at Asda first... (Doh!) was so funny, I learned my lesson so quickly - I'd said 'get a bag for your sister too' and her bag had about four sweets in it, the little one had an overflowing bag and the middle one a half full bag!

At cinema little one cried after ten minutes 'it's a boys film!!!' so we ended up traipsing out and going to the garden centre to look at the aquarium instead. (thus wasting about thirty quid!)

The little one decided to play with the cat flap - and after a shattering day, my cat woke me up pummelling it trying to get into the house.

The little one used to disappear into the bathroom frequently and it took me about three times to realise 'nothing' as a response to 'what are you doing in there' was actually a lie and meant 'mixing toothpaste up with shampoo and overflowing the sink'.

my three neices, I mean, not hers.

sleepingsowell that really resonates with me, i feel guilty for getting stressed as one day i will wake up and realise they are teenagers, the last 4 years has flown by as it is :( i need to cherish them more :(

hairytriangle i am so sorry to hear about your miscarriages :( >>> (..... ...and i have had the doing "nothing" in the bathroom too :o ..)

i might just send him school in casual dress and not say anything, just push him through the door and scarper :o my mums picking him up anyway as me, dh and dd are going wedding ring shopping tomorrow (YAY something to look forward to)