to be narked with my friend for leaving me in a strange city alone?

[whitby]

Six/seven months ago a friend of mine, Neil, told me they were thinking about going to a european city - let's say Berlin - to see some shows by a band we both like. He asked if I'd like to come to.

He'd been going on about how amazing Berlin is for years and I've always wanted to go so I thought it would be a great idea; Neil knows the city well and I'd like to see the band in new surroundings.

Neil chose the hostel (I've never stayed in a hostel before and had doubts but it has good reviews). He had a strong preference for one near the venue, which is quite far out of the middle of the city - but near public transport links. He knows the area well and I have never been there so I was fine with him choosing this stuff.

I booked my flights some time ago, involving DH talking Friday and Monday off work (he was fine with this but it meant 2 fewer holiday days), to look after the DCs. Neil was off in a different european city following this same band and said he'd book his when he got back.

Last night I got a message saying Neil was really sorry but he was desperate to see this band in Zurich on the friday night and would it be okay if he met up with me in Berlin on Saturday evening instead.

We texted back and forth and he was very much saying that if I insisted he'd miss the Zurich gig but he really really wanted to go. I didn't want him sulking at me all weekend in a strange city so I said okay in the end.

I don't really mind being on my own; on the Saturday there's loads of museums etc I'd want to go to. But being on my own in Berlin on the friday night seems like such a waste - I don't want to go clubbing on my own really, especially not knowing how transport works or having anything other than guide book recommendations to go on. DH is annoyed because I paid above the odds to fly out on Fri afternoon (can't change the flights to sat morning ones, already checked), and he's missing a day at work to no benefit.

I can just see myself in this hostel on my own on friday night like a massive billy no mates. I have looked it up and the Christmas markets close around 9.30/10pm which is something, and I can wander around looking at stuff in the middle of town, but I don't want to get stranded or feel unsafe.

I am trying to think of this as an adventure but just feel totally left in the lurch. AIBU?

YANBU because he had made plans with you which he broke and have now screwed the trip up a bit. But I think you could be being a bit whingey about it. Its done now, try and think of ways around it. Like someone else says this couldbe a big new adventure for you.

You might find you like visiting new places alone.

And like Mamiie, I find the timeout guides great. They have maps and guidance on the transport systmes and even phrases and menu guides. Its not all bad is it.

Yeah I am being very whingy. But Neil told me yesterday and I'm going tomorrow so I am a bit !

I will make the best of it because being miserable won't help anyone.

I'll see if there's a timeout guide for where I'm going. I'm sure it'll be fine.

I think you'll probably have a better time without Neil anyway

Is it Metallica?

I think you are being incredibly negative about it all. You can go and put a couple of hours in on the Reeperbahn and then go on a spending spree.
Do try going out to eat on your own, you may find you enjoy it.
Your 'friend' Neil sounds like a bit of a twerp TBH.
Make a shout now for a Berlin based MNer to put your mind at rest. IME, travel forums always point out the downsides of places, seldom do they big them up.

I would be equally pissed off and I'm used to travelling alone for work and have backpacked around Europe. Having dinner on your own in a country where you don't speak the language if extrmely dull in my experience and if aren't the type to go hang out in a bar.

I also think that when you have childrne and a weekend away is more of a big deal/treat spening in a way you don't want to is incredibly irritating.

I love NY and would (and have) spent many a happy weekend there on my own staying in Manhattan. Staying out of town in a country where you don;t speak the language and where your idea of a good time is not sitting having dinner on your own is not teh same thing at all.

I'm sure you will make the best of it but no you are certinaly NBU.

kreecher, I maybe am being a bit negative. I don't want to spend loads of money; don't have loads to spend. I wanted to have a weekend away with a good mate seeing a band we like, taking in some museums, being shown around 'his' city. On the cheap (hence hostel), just having fun.

I think maybe realising Neil is a bit of an inconsiderate twonk is part of my upset.

I've traveled quite a bit on my own previously and would honestly welcome a bit of a weekend away to do it again. Hostels are great- you meet loads of people, unlike hotels.

However, YANBU about your friend flaking out on you! I'd be beyond annoyed, and would unfortunately not be able to trust him in a similar situation again.

I think you can salvage your weekend, though. good luck. :)

AND, look on the bright side, having recently left Swizerland, I can remember how eye wateringly expensive it is to eat/drink/sleep. He will be pleased to meet you and maybe take you out for a slap up meal.