To think colleague over-reacted a little?

[Iklboo]

We were talking about Strictly and she said she really wants Kara to win now as she's just heard that Kara is dyslexic.
I asked, quite innocently, 'Does that make a difference for her?'
She stood up and pointed her finger at me and said in a quite tense voice 'She has problems telling her right from her left and so puts in extra hours of training. THAT's the kind of difference it makes to her iklboo! She's disabled'.
AIBU to think she's being a little bit over-sensitive because:
a) Kara whatserface wouldn't know my colleague if she stood up in her soup
b) Colleague doesn't know anyone with dyslexia (she stated as much). I do - DH is dyslexic.

It's not the first time she's worshipped at the altar of celebrity and given one of us an earful for not agreeing with her

Hmmmm...sounds like there's a bit more going on with this lady than just her concern about dyslexic celebs

recognised under DDA - well, guess they got it wrong

Oops sorry - don't know what came over me then. Came on a bit strong. Off for a lie down!

Really? You can tell me that I am disabled if I say I am not? And you don't think thats just a tiny weeny bit incredibly fucking patronising?

You piss right off.

On legal forms etc, people are asked whether they consider themselves to have a disability. It's not up to anyone else to decide whether it's a disability or not, but up to the person concerned.

The fact that dyslexia is recognised by the DDA only means that if a person has dyslexia and if he/she feels that it is a disability, employers etc can't just turn round and say its not a "proper" disability so they don't have to make any adjustments.

Many conditions are on a sliding scale, and what feels like a disability to one person is just "the way I am" to another. Not the same, but I wear glasses - if I had very bad vision I might count it as a disability. But the point where one person says "I have a visual disability" may be a point where someone else just says "Oh its fine I just need strong glasses".

Am not convinced AMIS

nowhere here does it say that self perception is key

Happy to discuss this in level headed way now I've had my funny five minutes...!

Personally find it odd to deny that it is a disability - do some people consider this a dirty word?

For many people it is a life limiting condition with attendant disadvantages. Lets stop calling it a disability and just label dyslexics as thick then! (not seriously suggesting that, but this is what used to happen before the condition was recognised, and part of that recognition is surely acknowledging it as a learning disability?).

The major campaigning groups for dyslexic consider it a learning disability - I tend to put a lot of credence in their expert perspective [shrugs]

Look it is simply this. You declare a disability and it still causes issues/comments. be it right or wrong it still has a certain stima attached to it. I am dyselixic but I dont consider myself disabled in any environment other then educational or very heavy paperwork environments. The inclusion of dyslexia under the disabled students allowance was very very late on. it has only been so about 10years at most. It was brought in to stop there being discrimination. Interestingly it was brought in about the same time as the specialist schools supporting and teaching those who had severe dyslexia were closed. basically make it a legal obligation to support the support in main stream for the kids who needed it.

I dont consider myself to have a proper dysability because i am only affected in specific areas. it doesnt affect and impact me all the time. You lose a limb it will always be lost and therefor impact you. You have a disability. You cant spell or read fast it will only afffect you when you need to read or spell. There are days that i can read anything and write high level papers. There are other days when i cant even read my son's low level reading book and as for writing forget it.

I dont suppose i am making much sense but am late for the school run so will be back in a bit.

YANBU

May I also add c) it's just a stupid fucking reality TV compettion so who gives a stuff about Strictly?

You can deny you have a disability and still not consider yourself ignorant OR stigmatised.
You can't decide for everyone, you can't tell people they must see themselves as disabled, and you can't tell them that you know better than them because you have decided them to be disabled even though they disagree.

Its a very good thing that dyslexia and things like that are designated officially as disabilities, for those people who need help or assistance or extra resources. That does not mean that everyone has to agree to label themselves in such a way.

hmc - but a person can decide whether it does "limit their activities" - depending on the level of their dyslexia, and the way they live their life, they may genuinely feel that it doesn't limit them in any meaningful way, and they are therefore not any less "able" than someone without the condition. So not "disabled" by it.

It can still be a condition which they have been diagnosed with, but its up to them whether they feel disabled by it.

Sorry for being so aggressive earlier BPB - it is just that I worry about dd and so get all emotive about the subject!

As someone who is dyslexic I am not disabled. I am still able to get on with my life and all my basic bodily functions are in good working order.

I just have to adapt and to overcome the problem of left and right I use my index finger and thumb to determine which is my left side. I figured this out when I was about 5 years old all on own. It works well because you can be quite discrete about it.

HMC what is is about dd you are worried about? As a dyslexic I have been to uni, done a ou course, a HNC course and all sorts. But if you give me a form to fill in sometimes i will take one look at it and cry. it is possible to work around dyslexia but it is about finding the coping strategies that suit the individual. On a bad day i turn the book upside down or use a green film. And use a computer but dont write anything by hand. Those strategies wouldnt work necessarily for someone else.

You have to try lots and lots of strategies to find the ones that work. And think outside the box. One of the best thigns about being dyslexic is you have to see the world outside of the box and the alternative routes.

No problem hmc, I understand that. But surely its a good thing (for your dd too) that many people with dyslexia do not consider them selves to be disabled?

I would not be doing what I'm doing (which is fairly academic, word-heavy research), if I weren't dyslexic. There are times when it would sound stupid for me to say it 'disables' me when actually it helps.

So for me it is a difficulty and I struggle with some things but it also brings benefits. I can't think of any other 'disability' that does.

I have Dyspraxia and consider myself disabled on that count. It does have some advantages in thinking differently (gives some cracking ideas in brainstorming, but mostly people freak out that my ideas are 'weird') but most of it is negative. I'm in my 20s, can't tell left from right, can't tell the time and until I was 16 I couldn't pour my own drinks without spilling. Sometimes my memory is so bad I forget my name and date of birth. Can't remember phone numbers. Can't ride a bike, I can't drive, I struggle to walk up and down stairs, I fall over a lot. I struggle with working memory.

I think it depends on the person - I have a friend with Dyslexia and Dyspraxia, his Dyslexia is worse, he can barely read so he considers himself disabled on that front but not on the Dyspraxia front. His is milder than mine. Guess it depends on the severity. At least the DDA recognises that Dyslexia/Dyspraxia etc can be disabling - for those who have these conditions we can choose whether we consider it severe enough in our case. I'm pleased that we have the choice :)