friendship or fake?

[xxfriendlymum]

About a year ago I made friends with a lady who has a DS and DD.
My DC are crazy about her kids and talk about them all the time.
We both moved house and didn?t see each for ages but kept in contact via text.
Last month she moved house again, a lot closer to me. We met up twice and took all the DC out on trips.
At the end of the week she text me and asked if she could borrow some money. It wasn?t a huge amount and I know she is not working, so being the friendly mum I am. I lent her the money.
She promised to repay in two days, but the next day text again asking to borrow more but could repay it all the next day.
I didn?t reply.
She has avoided me for a few weeks and occasionally texts me and says she will be down with my money but didn?t turn up.
This morning she re-paid me.
This afternoon she text asking if I could babysit her DD and DS.
She?s a good friend and I enjoy her company and my DC are best friends with her DC.
Should I continue the friendship or cut my losses?

If you like her continue the friendship but don't let her take the piss!

She did repay you, albeit late, so I would probably not lend money in future unless I could afford to wait for its return. Even then I would not lend a lot of money, but then I don't like the idea of borrowing money from, or lending to friends. I think it has the potential to ruin friendships. It has tainted this one for you already.
Just say that you haven't got it to spare if she asks again.

I would babysit, but would be wary of all the favours being on one side.

Whether the friendship is one sided depends very much on whether she would help you out if you asked.

If you like her, just see how it goes. She may be having a rough time and needs a friend. See if she still wants your company if you can't do her favours all the time when she asks and then you'll have your answer.

Agreed, you don't have to dump a perfectly good friendship. You just need to be clear on boundaries.

I think the fact that she did repay you means she cares about the friendship.

I was once told that if you lend money, consider it a gift, and if you get it back it's a bonus. (ie, it's very hard to get money back from friends if you lend it)

I would put that behind you now and continue your friendship as if it never happened.

I think what made me uncomfortable was the fact we hadn?t seen each other for ages and then suddenly she was asking for favours.
I guess, because I consider her a good friend, I hope that she thinks the same and is not taking advantage of my good nature.
Anyway I babysat for her DC and they all had fun.
I don?t really ask friends for favours very often and never borrow money .
I do understand the point about her maybe needing a friend.
But yes NBBB good point!

A year is a very short time for a true friendship to prove its worth. You can chose your friends but not those of your DC.

How old are your DC? How important is this friendship? Would it be worth keeping a superficial pleasantness about a relatively new acquaintance and not burning any bridges to see how things go and to get the real measure of this lady.

I think give the friendship a shot at working, but don't lend her money again.

Be nice to her but keep your money to yourself.

Call me cynical but my initial reaction is that she paid you back because next time she's going to ask you for more money. My hunch is that that wouldn't be paid back.

If you wanted to test the depth of her friendship to you, you could ask her for a favour that involves doing something she'd rather not do.

I think that when someone puts themselves out for you at a personal cost to themselves, it shows the level of their feelings towards you.

I would never ask my dearest friends to lend me money, it's up to me to manage my own life.

I think its bloody cheeky asking to borrow money from u. I just wouldn't do it. Its taking the piss. u have only just got back in touch too. I would be wary of her. Don't lend her money again but see how it pans out with her. X

I see you have already babysat but if she asks you again, maybe say yes but ask her if she babysit for you in return and fix the date.