Christmas presents, now my friend has 4dc

[KatyS36]

Myself and three school friends have retained the tradition of swapping Christmas presents even though we are all in our thirties. They are old friends, who I know will be in my life forever, but I'm not close to them on a day to day basis as I have moved so much for work and now live a consoderable distance away.

When the first babies came along we all bought presents for them too at Christmas and birthdays and I enjoyed doing so.

However, one of the girls now has 4DCs and I'm finding it all a bit much - both financially and in terms of time to track all the presents down. I generally spend £5-£10 per a present, although it has been tending to be nearer the £10 mark to get them what they want.

It's not that I can't afford it in absolute terms (we're reasonably comfortably off) but the amount of money involved is now much greater then I ever anticipated, and I've realised I've spend more than double on her family than on dd , and more than on DH.

AIBU to think about cutting back here? Has anyone got any thoughts, experience or good ideas? I don't want to stop presents completly, and I feel a bit mean even thinking like this, but it is now a lot of presents!

Thanks

Katy

Go on thebookpeople.com and pick up some lovely books/book sets for well under a fiver each. I buy for all my friends' DCs but I am boring auntie who gives books and I don't care! the book people have gorgeous things and great sets, I got a set of 10 books from the gruffalo writer for £10 that are going on DS's stocking and to two other toddlers, 5 fairy books for a fiver between two 7 year olds etc.

Bookpeople are doing free delivery till midday on Monday too. Code is "FREENOV"

I love onmyfeet's video rental and popcorn idea though and the gingerbread house kit. Going to pinch those I think :)

I need to do secret santa for a friend with a 3.5 year old and a 10 month old. Struggling for ideas which include the baby though...

My friends and I only buy gifts for the children on their birthdays. It's not just the money but thinking of what to buy.
My two oldest friends and I sound just like you and yours - we don't buy gifts for each other but we always meet up in December for a fab meal out and that is our gift to each other.

I was going to start a thread like this as I am in the same situation but with siblings!

There constantly seems to be a present to buy/hunt down, and christmas is getting rather overwhelming just in terms of the sheer number of presents I'm buying and hiding!

I think I'm going to go with a joint present next xmas. When we all started having dcs we agreed to just buy for kids though so not as bad as it could be.

My siblings and DH's brother and his wife send each other an ELC/Argos/other voucher in Nov each year, then we can put it towards a bigger than normal present for our DCs or get them something on behalf of their uncles and aunts in time for Christmas.

DS likes the idea that his bike came from Mummy and Daddy, but Auntie X gave him the wheels, uncle Y gave him the saddle.

Don't be surprised to hear many people have willingly backed out of the Xmas present exchange! My sisters in law and I have all agreed to cut out the presents between the cousins. No one misses them. No one was offended!
This present giving can really get out of hand.

I announced last year (it wasn't really a two way thing) that I wasn't going to do Christmas presents for friends children anymore as it was getting too expensive and time consuming.

I now only buy for the kids at their birthdays. So far no one has complained.

Several of my friends have made a pact that we no longer buy each other presents either but that we make time to go out for a posh lunch/dinner without the children once a year.

It is great fun and much appreciated as most of us have 'material' things but time with friends enjoying good food and wine is precious.