to feel a little envious of my friend for coping so well...

[mumtobe23]

I have a friend who gave birth to her first beautiful baby about three weeks ago, i'm over the moon for her, but does anyone else ever feel a bit when their friends seem to cope so well at everything?
I was a crying, nervous wreck for the first 3 months and barley left the sofa! It took me weeks to master breast feeding and get the courage to go out for a walk with my DD.

I'm so happy for her yet very envious of her as she seems to have taken to motherhood so well which is brilliant but... she has just given birth to her first child and not only is she breastfeeding esily, doing all the housework, cooking dinners & entertaining people she's been here there and everywhere with baby! And shes told all who will listen she's already back into her size 8's!
I'm just writing this because I feel a really sad about how i coped compared to her, AIBU?

MarineIguana - I was very happy and coped well with my first baby and the HV said exactly that to me - she kept saying I mustn't feel ashamed to admit if I wasn't coping etc etc!
In fact the reality was that as well as having a baby that just happened to sleep well, I had just moved into dh's house so he did all the housework, laundry etc (I was the one that didn't know how the washing machine worked!), and having had hyperemesis I was ecstatic about not feeling sick and having loads of energy compared with when I was pregnant.
Then I had ds1 who didn't sleep, breastfed till my nipples were bleeding, etc etc - it is all so random really.

I coped very well with the new baby and had a sense that others from my NCT class were finding it more difficult (though I would never have commented on that).

However I didn't cope with pregnancy at all well - was sick, whiny, depressed, moany, fed up to the back teeeth all the time. I felt very inferior to the others in my NCT class who just got on with it, a couple of them still cycling to class with their DHs at 35 weeks ... I felt truly useless and pathetic.

Your friend will have something she feels crap about. If nothing else she sounds like a perfectionist which must put her under awful mental strain - it will have to come out somehow, at some point. The fact that she feels the need to TELL everyone she is back in her size 8s isn't a good sign ....

Agree Bumpasadaisie - telling everyone about her weight loss may indicate that she is too 'proud' of it somehow. Like it was something that must be done sort of thing... Not a good sign.
I lost most of the weight very, very quickly but never really noticed it as was so taken up with everything else. Other people commented on it but it passed me by really. And I've been very obsessed with my weight all my life.

I looked like this on the surface for the first 9 months of DS1's life and then had a complete breakdown and got dignosed with PND. She may well be coping brilliantly but, behind the scenes, she also might not be.....things aren't always how the seem

Thankyou sethstarkaddersmum.... yes he has well and truely hit the terrible twos... this morning there was a tantrum about going downstairs, then a tanrum about what to eat for breakfast, then a tantrum about getting dressed, then a tantrum about leaving the house, then there was a tantrum about leaving the car! I was exhausted by the time I got to work!

My mother had the perfect experience with me and my sister- easy pregnancy and labour, breastfeeding within 20 minutes of the birth, and babies who slept 5 hours at a time and never got sick.

Lovely, but she seems to think that's how it is for everyone, despite seeing my sister go through a very different experience.

LOL, my MIL had one very logical child who never had tantrums and she sincerely believed that all you had to do was to explain things to children and they would behave! (Because no-one else had ever thought of doing that, of course )