To leave dhs clothes to rot in the washing machine

[CyberspaceCinders]

He puts it on

he leaves it

he forgets it

he is beyond hopeless

disclaimer
I have fished my clothes out

YANBU, perhaps you need to be more direct though, my DH doesn't pick up on even unsubtle hints. Just tell him to hang it out.

What my DH does that hacks me off is get the kids painting and art things all out, paint, pots, brushes, glue, paper, scissors etc. etc. all over the kitchen table floor, everywhere, then just fecks off. Leaves me to to all the sodding art supervision and clearing up. I overheard him telling another dad friend how he loves doing painting with the kids, well he would do as he's never had to do the sodding tidying up!!

[fumes...]

Awwww, it's really petty to pick out you own clothes and leave his in there. I do understand how you feel, but still, you're better than that.

I do this all the time it doesnt make any difference just leave them in and stick them through again. I always start the washing and either my husband gets it out or it stays in there for days.

well this is the man
who took the dog to work once and

came home without him,

the man who is always losing things

the man who goes off to work leaving his wallet behind

No, eaglewings, that's our way too. Five of us here, its the only way that makes sense.

In 24 years of living with DH he has never, ever put on a load of washing (not even when I've been having the DCs, not ever, not once). He did once iron a shirt though - took him 2 hours....

It's called passive aggression, what you're thinking of doing. It's what people do when they feel powerless, isn't it?

Far better is being assertive. Go and "remind" him like others have said. Or decide his talents lie elsewhere and concentrate on developing those. :)

YANB totally U, though. My DH does the same "for you" thing that someone mentioned, and when he starts washing, he won't stop. Gets everything from round the house (never mind if it's a dressing gown that was washed yesterday) and fills three loads. Hangs the first one up and leaves the other two for me. There's never space for it all and most of it didn't need washing in the first place. But he thinks he's helped out because I'm clearly not very good at it myself.

Aagghh!

Thank you, rant over, I feel better now.

Or tell him that as he is clearly unable to cope with laundry, you will be doing it all from now on. He will be vacuuming daily instead. Worth a go?

What I can't understand is why people think that it's totally unacceptable for blokes to be so feeble and helpless.

Surely they're the ones who're being passive aggressive by not doing these jobs properly in the first place.

On the suface, it may seem perverse to complain about something so seemingly petty, but when you've had years and years of it the resentment does creep in because you just end up by feeling that dh is yet another child you're charged with looking after.

Ask him to do it. If after a reasonable time he hasn't, ask him again. DH assures me that "reminding" like this is not the same as "nagging" which is when you repeatedly tell them with no opportunity to do it inbetween.

If you are pleasant and encouraging he is more likely to do it himself in future, I have mine trained to the point of bringing clean laundry upstairs, but he won't reliably put it away.

What is dh? shouldnt that be OH?

I would take them out and dry them, then iron them then put them away.

YANBU, I suspect the op is just fed up of doing his washing, yes marriage is a partnership but maybe she is in the same situation as me, in that she is the one that puts in all the effort forever tidying up and cleaning after him. I know when I said my vows I certainly did stand there and promise to do his washing and cleaning everyday for him. (p.s. I have spend the last 6 years reminding him of this!!)

Ive always done everything, because if I didnt it wouldnt get done, I dont want to live in a shit hole, I dont want to have loads of washing or ironing so I do it.

I guess some just think it should be 50/50 maybe you can split it different ways with different things.

I do a lot

well I seem to do a lot,
I seem to try to avoid nagging a lot,

Maybe I just want a bit more than my lot,

YANBU. Nothing pisses me off more than when someone (especially DH) starts a job and then doesn't finish it.

In our house our laundry is completely separate. We each have our own washbaskets and we do the whole things ourselves for our own stuff. I have nothing whatsoever to do with DH's clothes. If he leaves stuff in the washing machine (which is rare) I just take it out and put it the plastic basket we use to carry the washing to the washing machine. At that point he usually notices (he just genuinely forgets, as do I at times) and he sorts it out. There's no angst or hassle about washing whatsoever.

My mum was quite shocked when I first moved in with DH and I said I didn't do his washing. She's by no means a housewifely type, in fact, for most of her marriage she has worked while my dad stayed at home. While my dad is very good with housework he has never ever done any washing (though he will hang it out sometimes). She seems to think it's the woman's job. I just don't get it. As far as I'm concerned laundry is part of personal hygiene, like showering and cutting toenails. I don't do these things for DH so why should I do his laundry? Besides which, there is no way I'd trust him with my clothes.

DP is brilliant at lots of things but has a total blind spot with laundry.

We have a laundry basket with separate sections for lights and darks, but he still manages to mix up loads. He'll wash things like jeans and towels with delicates and nice tops of mine (and has ruined a few really nice things). despite me BEGGING him that if he's kind enough to do laundry PLEASE just do a load of sheets or his own clothes or something).

Bless him

you are lucky jareth...
he tries bless him

dh announced that

He is just more laid back about these things

oh yes the mundane things of life

Think I

Mine ended up in A+E slicing his very tip of his finger off loading the washer! I tend to do it because he overloads the drier otherwise and stuff doesn't get dried off properly - but he will if a pants crisis is looming. He tries to get me to do his ironing without success (I rarely iron my own stuff - just buy things that don't crease) and he's been known to look forlornly at his mother when she visits so she'll iron his shirts for him.

He does, however refuse to load the dishwasher which is driving me slowly crackers - he'll throw stuff in the top, or leave it in the sink. I've tried to tell him to imagine it's Tetris and stuff has to fit in properly - failure so far.

Oh and he's left me a mahoosive pile of his trousers to mend!

He's pretty good around the house really though - just falls back into being boy-child on occasions.

I normally put the washing on and whoever passes it when it finishes empties it.

(DH also has a habit of listing any jobs he has done, as if I have done nothing all day)

that is dhs excuse that he never passses the washing machine

Out of sight out of mind,..
how on earth does one injure oneself on a washer ....

boychild .....good name

oh no

Cinders does nothing all day ....

To be fair, there is nothing worse than clothes that sat in the washer before drying. We went through a phase when I was pregnant and couldn't get out to hang washing (we had building work out back and I couldn't get down without steps). He used to frequently forget or leave it a day or so and we always smelled musty euurrggh.

dh disagreed that the clothes get stinky..

men Bah..