In fact I know I'm not being unreasonable, just want to understand why so many people think I am! DH and I had DD quite young, he has always worked full time since the age of 16 and earned fairly good money but was working in a call centre with no room to work his way up and no qualifications. After DS was born we decided we would bite the bullet and be poor for a few years so he could go to uni and get a degree, then do a pgce in teaching, meaning that although we would be worse of for a while we would end up better off in the future. He hasn't told his dad as his dad would be disapointed in him, all his colleagues thought it was really irresponsible and even the cashier in Lloyds bank the other day had a bit of a go at him asking what his family thought of this little plan...