to enjoy wedding speeches?

[SHRIIIEEEKPoolingBearBlood]

OK some are better than others but in general you sit back with a glass of wine and some cake or chocolate and watch something mildly amusing for about half an hour.
And yet so many people hate them.
(Do these people watch X Factor?? :o)

YANBU - I would be very sad to think that guests were inwardly cringeing and counting the minutes during our wedding speech. If we want to thank the Hamster and outline the contributions of our parents to our healthy attitude towards sex its our wedding, why shouldnt we?

I love a good wedding speech but the most memorable are the terrible ones. I went to a wedding where the two best men did a rambling speech, complete with slides, that went on for ages and was really dull. You could see everyone shuffling in their seats, wondering if it would be rude to go to the bar.

At another the best man told a very funny but quite rude joke. This might have been okay but for both families being fairly straight laced types. It was so funny to watch the looks of disapproval [hgrin]

I saw a Dont Tell The Bride recently where the groom expressed his releif the three week separation was over (the bride had been away from him for 3 weeks while he organised the wedding) - he was releived because he was "starting to walk funny" and "forgetting which bits go where" - there was polite laughter but I felt for the bride and her parents! I would kill my DP if he said that at our wedding!!

Jodiesmummy we have to count the minutes - otherwise nobody knows who's won the sweepstake !

yes i wouldn't mind turning this thread into "amusing wedding speech stories"

I like them, totally agree with you SPB, wine, cake, and a half an hour of affection for people that I like.

Note I did limit it to half an hour.

I used to feel the same until I went to a wedding where the groom was Dutch. Forget half an hour, all his mates stood up in turn and made speeches (some with bloody PowerPoint for chrissake!). It was like a sadistic extended version of This Is Your Life. Aaaaaaaarrrrrgh!

Yes - some are irredeemably dull, but some are hilarious (not always intentionally).

Example 1: My dad's second wedding. The best man made a speech entirely focused around the theme of sheep shagging. Granny's face was a picture.

Example 2: A friend's wedding. The groom in his speech managed to imply that the bride was a slut for sleeping with him on the first date. I think the exact words were "you may think this means Helen's easy..." Cue indrawn breaths from the whole room and total outrage on the face of the bride's father. In the groom's defense, he was incredibly drunk and in no way did he mean to offend his new wife or her family.

On the whole I like them, I always get a bit teary at them (mind you I'm usually drunk long before the speeches)

I went to one were the best man mentioned the groom's first wife 3 times even comparing the wedding unfavourably to his first (which to be fair was quite spectacular but even so). It was supposed to be a joke but nobody laughed!

We asked my FIL not to make a speech as he had been difficult about the wedding (long story). Regardless, he got up with three pages of A4 and droned on and on. The best man (BIL and a total arse) used the F word and C word liberally in his, in front of many kids. Husband said about three words. I thanked everyone for coming and got drunk.

I love them. I'm supposed to be listening to some RIGHT THIS MINUTE but I am at home with DCs and tummy bug.

BIL mentioned in his speech at our wedding the fact that I was rubbish at housework .

I went to a wedding where the bride's family were fanatical born-again evangelical Christians

the best man stood up and thanked the bride's father for cumming

it was fucking AWFUL

worth every penny of the train fare

At my friend X's wedding to her DH, Y, her father stood up and his ENTIRE speech was "I just want to thank my beautiful daughter, Z, for making me a grandfather again - sob!" and he sat down. (Z recently had a child).

The best man stood up "I have known X and Y since we were 16, and I always knew we would be standing here on their wedding day" - ah, good start. The HE sat down!?

The groom did actually deliver a normal speech. I felt a bit sorry for her, but she looked oblivious.

I am still mortified by our wedding speeches. Amongst other things, my MIL got incredibly drunk and when I was giving my speech and thanking my bridesmaid called out that that bridesmaid had slept with one of the groomsmen. She then grabbed the microphone and told a joke about three nuns with gonorrhea (sp?). The SIL got up and gave 45 minute speech about how DH was her "soul mate" and how she had taught him everything he knew about how to treat a woman. Just plain weird.

The worst wedding speech story I heard was the brother of the bride who gave the first speech of the night and proposed to his girlfriend in it. Thereafter every speech was about how fantastic their engagement was. They didn't even end up getting married in the end.