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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want my PIL's rubbish in my bin?

33 replies

anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 16:22

My rubbish is collected every two weeks. If you overfill your bin/have extra bags, nothing gets taken. We recycle a lot, but still pretty much fill our bin in a fortnight.

So today, went to put a bin bag in the main (should be empty) bin, and it is two thirds full - two huge black bags of rubbish. On closer inspection, I establish that this is my PILs two bags, and they are pretty much full of newspapers and cardboard etc ie. recycling, but mixed nicely with torn tea bags and other slightly messy stuff. They live close by and have the same bin collections as us.

I then had to spend 15 minutes opening their bags and fishing out the stuff that can go in the recycling in order to give ME some room to put rubbish in MY bin in the next two weeks before next collection.

AIBU to think this is rather cheeky and a bit selfish because if my bin is full, I have to take the extra to the dump! If theirs is full or they can't wait to get rid of whatever it is, shouldn't THEY go to the dump, or at least recycle what they can so that it fits in their bin???? MIL, who recently moved back into our county has regularly said she is not keen on the "new fangled bin thing" (It's been here five years). But she doesn't need to take it out on me!!!!!!!

I get on with PIL's very well, and don't want to make a big fuss, but am seeing them tomorrow and am tempted to say, in a jokey way, "oh, what was that about, eh?!"

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 28/10/2010 16:23

I would have taken it back and dumped it in their garden

notsocrates · 28/10/2010 16:24

Shock ...you mean it's not like they asked????? It's pretty outrageous actually. Might they have asked your DH and he forgot to mention it?

GoreRenewed · 28/10/2010 16:24

YANBU

DaisySteiner · 28/10/2010 16:25

I would mention to them casually, in passing Wink that some cheeky sod has been putting rubbish in your bin and see what they say!

ajandjjmum · 28/10/2010 16:25

Definitely recycle back to where it cam from!!! Shock

LadyInPink · 28/10/2010 16:26

I would have a chat with your DH first to ask whether he said it was ok for them to put stuff in your bin. We often do the same for our pil too but only if we have room not when ours is empty and we have no way of knowing how full it would be - does seem bloody cheeky to me and would def say something if your DH knows nothing! We are all in the same boat so it's not fair of them!

onceamai · 28/10/2010 16:27

Has MIL driven PIL to distraction and it was a quick get out? Think a quiet word is in order here. Perhaps you should calmly explain what you had to do to sort it out and offer to show them where the dump is. That's all with hindsight though; I would have been furious and YANBU.

Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 16:27

Daisy that is precisely what I will do!

No, they didn't ask, and DH when I told him said "bloody cheek, I'm going to have a word". So clearly, they didn't ask him. And they KNOW how funny the bin men are about the bin, if it is half an inch open, they won't take etc etc... And FFS, there are only two of them, and most of what was in the damned bag was newspapers etc!!!! WHY couldn't they recycle, or leave in a pile for recycling? Not as if papers start to smell or antying.

Good, just wanted to be sure I wasn't BU before either he or I say something at the weekend!

OP posts:
BuntyPenfold · 28/10/2010 16:28

I would explain the system to them again.

We have just changed from weekly to fortnightly collection of black bags, and had several leaflets through the letterbox, articles in local paper explaining new system, helpline number, and a calendar/chart through the door.

The roadside was still pretty much lined with uncollected black bags.

Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 16:29

They will call later, I know, to check arrangements for tomorrow, so will be interested to see if they mention it. I wasn't here when they "dropped by" this morning.... Hmm.

BTW they had permission to come into the house to collect something, I knew they were coming, I just didn't know they were going to fill my sodding bin!!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 16:31

Bunty they KNOW the system all right, absolutely they know. Because they moan in detail about it, so they flippin well know how it works!! And they are not lazy people, far from it, they are meticulous about everything, I just am a bit stunned that they felt our bin was fair game for their rubbish!!!!

OP posts:
ENormaSnob · 28/10/2010 16:33

yanbu

I would be livid tbh.

BuntyPenfold · 28/10/2010 16:37

I would be cross too anonbrainsnatcher

Inlaws so tricky though.
My MIL, otherwise very dainty, meticulous and immaculate, has the most vile table manners I have ever seen. But is it worth the bad feeling? Not sure.

Rhian82 · 28/10/2010 16:39

What I would want to do is leave the bags in the garden, then when they visited, point to them and ask them to sort through their rubbish and remove the recycling from the rubbish.

I wouldn't though. But I would fleetingly consider it! That sounds worse than the rest to me - because of their selfishness you had to sort through dirty bin bags!

Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 16:42

I once happened to be on the way to the dump with a load of stuff, dropped by their house to ask something, and happened to mention where I was going and their eyes lit up "oooo, they said, room for another bag or two". So I did, obviously, no skin off my nose.

Maybe I am now their refuse disposal operative!!!

I am marginally pissed off, but won't let it ruin my day, and yes, I did have to sort through their rubbish (but only what was very obvious recycling and non dirty!)

OP posts:
LadyInPink · 28/10/2010 16:43

OMG they hadn't asked your DH - in that case they are so very very unreasonable then! Don't say it in a jokey way, have strong words otherwise they will think you are fair game again to dump upon.

BigWelt · 28/10/2010 16:49

I would take the stuff back and put it in their bin along with some of your stuff. And then kick the bin over.

MoralDefective · 28/10/2010 17:05

YADNBU.....our bloody neighbours did this ALL the freaking time.Pissed us off considerably as we have always recycled our stuff.
I used to fill the boot of my car to go to the recycling bins at the back of Sainsbury's before we had collections.
Not to mention the fact that it's using up your bin space.
YES....BigWelt....[grrr]

dockate · 28/10/2010 17:16

If councils do start charging based on weight of domestic waste (as they've been talking about for ages) you'll be even more pissed off - so I'd definitely be having words.

trixie123 · 28/10/2010 17:22

YANBU we have our bins in an alley at the end of the row of houses and despite me painting our house no on ours, other people just put their stuff in anyway - we came home from a week away and it was overflowing. We've also had problems with completely random people leaving their excess rubbish. Fortunately our bin men are not too picky about overfull bins but I have been able to be home to explain to them and ask nicely to take the excess. Its horrible nd inconsiderate and if it really is your in laws that's even worse!

Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 17:26

Oh, it's definitely the PIL's, I recognised some of the packaging from something they had in their house yesterday!!!!

I am really amazed, this is just so not like them, completely out of character, it's like they had a "moment of madness" or something because they are real community people, ie all fair, kind to our neighbours etc etc...

Anyway, it WILL come up over the weekend, and I will do my best not to lose my rag, but equally I want it clear that it ain't happening again!

OP posts:
PfftTheMildySpookyDragon · 28/10/2010 18:08

You didn't have to sort through their rubbish.

DMCWelshCakes · 28/10/2010 18:10

My neighbour has a similar habit & it drives us & the other neighbours crazy. We've mentioned it a number of times, & think the problem is solved, but every now & again he does it again. It's not like they don't know where the waste centre is or have a transport problem. It's just sheer laziness as far as we can tell.

Original poster
anonymousbrainsnatcher · 28/10/2010 18:16

Pfft, if I wanted my rubbish to fit in my bin, I had to do something - I noticed that the top of one of the bin bags was full of newspapers and cardboard packing, so I stuck that in the recycling bin. My bin bag had to go somewhere, it couldn't go back in the house, and if I just stuck it on top of their two big bags, then a) the bin would be almost full and b) I would then still have to go through the process of extracting their or some other bin bags after the weekend... when it would have a chance to fester and get REALLY gross.

In an ideal world, I'd have dumped it on their doorstep, but it was quicker for me to do the recycle thing.

But words will be had!

OP posts:
PfftTheMildySpookyDragon · 28/10/2010 18:40

No - I know that you had to if you wanted to fit it in. I understand that.

I mean that you should have taken the two rubbish bags back to them and politely told them that you don't have space in your bin for their rubbish.

It's not about what is quicker for you, because then, you could do it again and again. I would have taken the extra time to tell them off Grin. What they did was incredibly rude!