single mums

[grownupmum]

Is it unreasonable for single people like my daughter to have to save VERY hard to buy a flat ,yet if she were pregnent she would be given one ? Will this change with the budget cuts ? ,I'm fed up of working and paying tax to support girls that could easily stay at home ( as I would have had to)

hmmm interesting ....grownupmum,only one post??

are you new or a namechanger??

or something else??

well I'm a single mum on benefits and I feed my children nice bread, no-one gave me a house though, and I do have some nice stuff in it - as agreed amicably with exH that I could keep the contents and he'd keep the house.

We bought some nice stuff when he was earning a decent wage, and so it sits nicely in my house.

Same here MaMoTTaT,

Unfortunately my exH had the temerity to die, so I recieve benefits. And eat decent bread, you know to put the beans on for my son's evening meal.

If that's Ok with you OP. FFS, get a life...

Ha, is nice bread the new benchmark

OP, don't be a fool.

When you say 'given a flat' do you mean that they are given a council flat, or that they live in a flat and have their rent paid?

Clarify please.

I'm a single mother in a pleasant house with a decent telly and enough computers for everyone. These were all bought (except the latest pc, which I was given second-hand) before I lost my job. I'm not currently troubling the benefits system but will have to if I can't get a job before the compensation runs out. When/if it does, and assuming the older DCs don't suddenly make a fortune and pay off my mortgage (unlikely!), there will have to be some hard choices made. However, if you looked at my lifestyle and assumed the council gave me this on a plate, you'd be livid.

I'm fat, too...

Oh, and I also have a car (only five years old, the newest one I've ever owned). I think I'll be more upset about having to sell that than the house. I know damn' well the state won't pay for me to run a private vehicle, nor do I believe for one moment that it should (given that no-one in the household currently has mobility problems, fortunately). But right now, in my unemployed single-mumhood, I have one. The papers could have a field day if they just gave some selective headline facts and let people's imaginations fill in the details.

This & the bread thread!

The Tories are out in force.

People with low incomes and fancy TVs will have got them from Brighthouse or somewhere similar.

I think the circs must be very different depending on where you are. I know a girl who bcame pregnat despite knowing she was with a losing, cheating, scumbag.
She was housed immediately in a lovely 2 bed flat, given the deposit (£500) by the council, and has just bought herself a much nicer car than mine.

She has no intention of returning to work, and thinks because she has a child she is entitled to everything.

I'm sure life isn't like this for everyone, as stories on here show, but sometimes it does ridiculously easy to get on the benfits train and not bother getting off. That's not good for anyone.

It's easy to tar everyone with the same brush, but I think people who automatically say 'oh fuck off back to the Daily Mail' are being very prejudiced, which is exactly what they are accusing the OP of being.

It's easy to tar everyone with the same brush, but I think people who automatically say 'oh fuck off back to the Daily Mail' are being very prejudiced, which is exactly what they are accusing the OP of being.

The Op stated that she felt it unreasonable that her daughter had to save to afford to buy a flat and that if she got pregnant she would be given one. That is just not true in this day and age and is a prejudicial statement in my opinion.

It is not "tarring everyone with the same brush" to respond with "Fuck off back to the Daily Mail" It was a response to an ignorant statement.

Seems everyone nowadays knows a Sinlge Mum with A sense of Entitlement matched, or in some cases exceeded by the size of her flatscreen, plasma T.V.

But I know it is easy to be 'given' a flat, because that's exactly what happened to this girl.
Of course that story isn't universal, but neither is the two year wait for a dingy hostel.
She wasn't of course given it, it's rented - but she is housed very comfortably, because she got pregnant.

Maybe everyone does know a single mum with a sense of entitlement because there are lots of them. I certainly know a few.

You know It's easy, because that is what happened to this girl you know.

And for everyone like her there are several more who wait for a long time for accommodation.

If she has no intention of returning to work then she has a rude shock when she finds out she is expected to work when her child reaches five.

So sick and tired of the myth of feckless single mums. It is sickening.

Luckily in the area I live in people don't end up in hostels and B&B's either, although I am very surprised the rules vary so much that you can claim housing benefit for a 2 bed place whilst pregnant. Every where I have ever lived, the rules state the child must be over 1 year before they are entitled to a bedroom.

When I found myself unexpectedly single and up shit creek with a baby I did end up with a gorgeous flat. It was privately rented, I needed my own deposit and a guarantor as I was claiming housing benefit. I can imagine the situation is not so rosy if you lack someone to lend you over a grand for a deposit and a home owner willing to guarantee your rent! Then I had to furnish the place...

The main point of the OP that I found risible was the comparison between a young girl saving to buy her own home and working and someone with a baby, lacking support, but lucky enough to be provided with somewhere to live by the tax payer. Unless you work pretty hard you are often stuck in the benefit trap for quite a while. I disliked it intensely and got my self off all benefits as quickly as I could. The situations are incomparable and it is a ridiculous post.

So, as a tax payer now I do not resent housing young girls with children, I count my lucky stars that is no longer me and my life is moving forward.

Yep,tis the exact reason i had my dc

except i had to wait 6 years in a hostel...

disco she won't have been "given" the £500 for the deposit - she'll have been given a loan which she will be paying off on a monthly basis.

She said given. I'll ask her, a loan sounds more likely though.

I have to say I don't know anyone waiting for accommodation, but as I said it must depend where you live.

It's easy to say you are sickened by the myth of feckless single mums, but it's just as easy to be sickened by the number of children born (like this girl's kid) who have no hope of ever having two parents to care about them. The dad will only see it now and then when he can be bothered to stop smoking weed, and she knew this when she decided to get prg.
Just because a person is pregnant doesn't make them sacred.
Yes there are deserving cases, but there ARE also feckless cases, it's no good pretending they don't exist.

yes it'll be the rent assistance scheme by the sounds of things (goes under slightly different names in different councils but essentially the same thing). They act as a guarantor to help you get into private rental instead of waiting for a council house. They "pay" the first months rent (but actually take it out your housing benefit so you have to wait 8 weeks for the first payment to come to you) and pay the deposit - but then you pay that back to them over time.

I was 17 (oh the memories) and preggers 25 yrs ago and was given a flat. It was in one of the roughest areas of town damp cold and high rise.I was scared to go out and got burgled regularly.I was about 6 miles from any family and didnt drive.I wept once when my mum visited as i was so lonely. I went on to train as a nurse and was called names daily as i walked home in my uniform.Sorry to say my only way out was when i met a decent man and thus had two incomes.
I hope my dd has to save to buy a place when ready rather than go thru that glamour!!

I know a single mother who was "given" a flat. She had been in care all her life, so was considered vulnerable, the father of her child is in prison and her family situation is chaotic, no way for her to live with any family members.

She was "given" a flat, when her child was a year old and she had been living in a hostel since she was 16. Lots of factors there and I sort of think with the life she had been given up to that point then she was greatly deserving of a bit of security and help.

I think there are A LOT of stories like this when you look behind the cliches.

Don't be a dick OP.

Single mums get buggerall for producing a new generation of tax payers, to put it in crude economic terms. The least we should do is support them to raise healthy, educated children.

Where are the useless partners? Why don't they get hounded by the media etc.

If this government made decisions based on economic reality rather than prejudice and ignorance they would not be hitting single mums/mums in general with cuts to benefits, they would view such benefits as an investment in the future economic health of the UK. Morons.

And if you really want to get outraged, look at white collar criminals. They are the ones with their snouts in the trough.

I think the title of this thread is prejudiced and insensitive. I know plenty of couples who recieve ''generous'' benefits you know.

So op you are being a very unreasonable tosser. I work my butt off both bringing up dd and in a ''prper'' job.

Troll surely? BTW- i rent and do not own my own flat or council house.

I'm ashamed that there are women who are MOTHERS with a dp who know how bloody hard it is bringing up a child even with a loving and supportive dp who think that girls get pregnant as a cushty option. Wierdos.