think that i don't have to have the same budget for each child

[AuntiePickleBottom]

my daugter will be 18 months comes christmas and have had all off my son toys from that age ( i don't do gender sterotyping toys) so he has had alot of 'girl type toys'

so i will be spending extra on ds either that or dd will be overwhilmed (sp), i said this to a few people who said i must spend the same amount.

wtf do i need to do this

of course you don't.

If you DCs are too young to know the monetary value of anything, it is not a problem.

When they get older they can be quite upset if the feel they are not being treated equally.

So for now, no problem at all.

you dont.

even when they are older, you dont need to. say you spend £60 on a toy for ds, if theres a toy for dd at £30 you know she'll love, you get it.

very simple.

I dont think I spend them same on my 3 DCs ever. Id go mad trying to work out what id spent on each one! I just try to get what they want, within reason & budget. As babies, I definitely spent a lot less on them than their older siblings!

You don't. This x-mas dd2 wants a dolls house. A wooden one. Likely to cost upwards of £150. Dd1 wants an mp3 player capable of playing video and viewing photos. It costs £69.

In our family we get an equal(ish) number of gifts. The price of which evens out in the end. Dd1 has a slight understanding of the concpet of how much things cost, but not to this scale. All younger ones are bothered about is how many boxes they get to play in

Your 18 month old, I am guessing, cannot count or has any concept of money?

She'll probably only play with the box anyway!

Why do you care what anyone else thinks about this?

The kids won't know what costs what, and just want what they want. Iyswim!

Of course you don't - its a ridiculous idea. Some people are mad when it comes to spending money at christmas (or any other time for that matter ).

The baby (20 months at xmas) isn't getting much.
Ignore people.

thanks, dd will be more intrested in the paper and even ds thinks a packet of sweets cost 20 thousand dollers lol

I've always refused to get caught up in spending exactly the same amount on my two for Christmas, they're now 17 and 13. I buy them what's on their wish list and some surprises that I know they'll love. Some years the oldest has had more money spent on her, other times it was the youngest. The girls don't seem bothered either, I would hate them to think it was all about the cost of something.

If it really bothers you then put the difference in your younger child's bank account. So you have then "given" it to her, just not in the form of a wrapped up present.

I don't spend the same on my 3. It depends on what they want.

This business of getting all children the same is very odd. My cousins' family did this between four of them, down to the penny. They'd get extra,small things tagged on to the big present to make up the cost.
Even as small children my brothers and I hoicked our judgy pants and thought this madness. I still do.

The only time I would consider even thinking about it is perhaps in step families where it might become an issue. Not saying it would in all steps obviously but in some I know of it would. But that's it.

The budget doesn't have to be the same - we have a 2 a 4 and a 6yo - many of there gifts are 'sourced' in car boot sales so prices are variable.

This year we have decided to get a Wii for all the children plus the other smaller presents. I will ensure there are an equal number of gifts to unwrap as that is what the children will notice. I always counted the number of presents my siblings and I had when I was growing up.

YANBU

Of course you don't need to spend the same! I think it is a very simplistic interpretation of treating children fairly.

MIL still insists on spending exactly the same on her two children (DH 41 and SIL 45, who incidently both have well paid jobs), to the extent where she will make up the difference by putting the any shortfall between the two in cash in an envelope or buying any kind of tat 'to make it up'. The ridiculous thing is that she doesn't treat them fairly at all, not in the things that really count.

Of course you don't. Kids that young are more important in the wrappings. When they get older I think it is more important that they all have the same amount of presents to open, not that the gifts cost the same.

You don't always have to be equal to be fair.

Of course you don't need to spend the same amount.

YANBU, no reason to spend the same amount.

A friend at uni had parents who ensured they spent the same amount per child to the penny. To the extent that if they bought her and her siblings ice cream, and she had a slightly cheaper one than the her brother/sister they'd give her the difference on top of pocket money!

If anything, it's given her an awful sense of entitlement, she's still concerned with what her parents are spending on her siblings even aged 31.

there's really no need but i did have that same idea before the DC arrived.

this xmas DC1 is getting a present that we know he'll love around £80. DC2 only 20 months now will have something that i know she'll love which costs no more than £30.

i feel no need to spend the same to "make up the difference" though i do spend roughly the same on the stocking presents. thats always my favourite bit re: presents anyway and i could go a little mad if i wanted to so have capped it at £20 each.

as other posters have said when they're much older they'll possibly see the difference so deal with it then!