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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask you all to give me a right big kick up the arse?

71 replies

ChristmasTrulyReigns · 18/10/2010 21:18

I'm just too self conscious to book my well overdue smear test, let alone go for one. and

Please nag, cajole, inveigle and bully me into gaining a more positive attitude towards this.

I just need some persuasion and encouragement, I know I need to get on and do it, but there's something that's forming a mental barrier to the process.

I'm normally quite a brave soul, but this is truly defeating me.

OP posts:

Original poster

ChristmasTrulyReigns · 18/10/2010 22:20

Sorry, just realised how inane that must have sounded.

Covering awkwardness with humour sorry.

OP posts:

SquidgyBrain · 18/10/2010 22:20

just promise yourself a nice treat after you have had it done :)

The head in the sand excuse isn't washing either - you just need to have it done - simple!

What would you say to your DH/DP if they were doing the same thing as you - I bet there would be an "AIBU to think that DH/DP is being stupid and selfish for not going for a prostate exam"

go on do it tomorrow and then come back and gloat at how great you are for doing it it will feel great - the gloating not the smear

FeedMeSeymour · 18/10/2010 22:21

I should add that my former colleague being knocked back by an elderly male GP cos 'her periods would settle down by the time she is 25, and the constant bleeding is nothing to worry about' cannot be compared to women sticking their fingers in their ears and going 'la la la, if I don't have a smear test, cos it's a bit icky, the nasty cancer will not get me'

For God's sake, get it done! It doesn't hurt, it's usually done by another woman who has seen so many thousands of fanjos and it's over in about a minute. Please. Don't let my lovely Geraldine die in vain. She would really want you to be tested.

winnybella · 18/10/2010 22:25

You gave birth to four kids and are squeamish about a smear that will take a minute at most to complete?

We will be all waiting to hear from you tomorrow, you know - better make that appointment.

Lauriefairycake · 18/10/2010 22:27

I too am avoiding going as I'm convinced I have a problem.

I've been complaining for 8 years about my abdominal pain, intermittent bleeding, bloating, feeling 'full'. I've been admitted to hospital twice with paralysing womb pain to be told it was pelvic inflammatory disease.

They did two rubbish smears on me twice in the last 8 years - tilted vervix, hard to get at apparently. Both times the nurse commented that she probably didn't get any proper cells.

I have been called again for my routine smear and I just don't want to go

The bloating and uncomfortable feeling is so bad a couple of days a week that I have considered going for a private blood test as apparently you can test for cancer in a blood test (I might be remembering that wrong)

I can honestly say I'm avoiding thinking about it right now as I have never had a considered or helpful response from the doctor/nurse or hospital when I was admitted.

winnybella · 18/10/2010 22:29

And for the last time- it DOES NOT hurt!

They used to snip (IIRC) little bits of skin to get a sample-now they just brush it- a second or two in one place, another second in another etc and you're done in a FEW seconds. And speculum doesn't hurt either-it just goes into the bottom of your vagina and stretches it a bit, but it's not painful.

Lauriefairycake · 18/10/2010 22:33

I haven't had kids and I find it really hurts as they have to probe and scrape quite hard on me.

They also vice me open too far and I can't walk afterwards for wobbliness for a couple of minutes.

Some people really hate being interfered with - I'm one of them

winnybella · 18/10/2010 22:34

Laurie- so you were suffering for 8 years? You need to get to the bottom of this. Go private if you can afford it. I do know it can be frustrating as I have been suffering with pain after sex around ovulation time and even though I had ultrasounds done and obv smears etc, no one can tell me what it is- perhaps endo, I think, but I haven't got around to booking the op to check it out.

In any case, tilted cervix or not, you should be able to find a doctor who can perform a proper smear, do the ultrasound and investigate your problems.

Lauriefairycake · 18/10/2010 22:39

I know I should - it's just that every time I've complained about it (perhaps 4 times in the last 8 years) they look at my notes and say "ooh, you had PID, perhaps it's back - would you like some antibiotics".

I have just realised through posting this how really pissed off I am with myself. I make excuses all the time for the pain - it's there now when I focus on my body and think about it - most of the time I just get on with things.

Scuttlebutter · 18/10/2010 22:39

Christmas, please go and have it done. I've had cervical cancer and am very lucky indeed to be here to nag you. Believe me when I say that having a smear is as nothing to being treated for cancer, which also put paid to any chance of me having children, and has left me with life long after effects.

Cervical smears and the new vaccine are a huge leap forward in womens health. Sadly, there are still too many young women dying in developing countries because they don't have access to smear tests. I just can't imagine having access to a free service that could potentially save your life and refusing to bother. For me it would be like refusing to wear a seat belt in the car.

Consider yourself royally kicked. And I will come back and nag you unless you tell us you've booked the appointment.

allhallowsandwine · 18/10/2010 22:41

lauriefarycake just to reassure they do not use the metal vice like spectulum they use clear plastic ones that fit snuggly into your vagina with out any stretching and they no londger scrape with a wooden spatula they use a very fine brush and you do not actually feel that happening.

Lauriefairycake · 18/10/2010 22:46

Is that recent then allhallows?

winnybella · 18/10/2010 22:51

Yes, Laurie, they use brushes now, it doesn't hurt (and I have very sensitive cervix and didn't really enjoy smears before).

Mumcentreplus · 18/10/2010 22:51

Laurie thats true...they don't use the evil metal duck-billed thingie...its all plastic and disposable..

Mumcentreplus · 18/10/2010 22:52

come join us and book your smear tomorrow

Lauriefairycake · 18/10/2010 22:54

ok, I will, you have all been very kind at allaying my fears.

allhallowsandwine · 18/10/2010 22:57

for past two years i have been going and they have been using this the brush in last year...its fine honest!!

Original poster

ChristmasTrulyReigns · 18/10/2010 23:26

Right that's 3 of us booking appointments tomorrow?

Some virtual hand-holding needed methinks.

OP posts:

Mumcentreplus · 18/10/2010 23:33

...bluddy hell I have to do it now don't I?..

GrimmaTheNome · 18/10/2010 23:41

didn't really enjoy smears before

so now you really enjoy them?

Wouldn't go so far as that but really its not much bother. Better now that its ususally practise nurses who do it.

TheLadyEvilStar · 18/10/2010 23:58

Read this and please please have it done

TheLadyEvilStar · 19/10/2010 00:05

Reading this thread has got me panicking again as I had avoided my smear for 5yrs until last week, the reasons why are on the thread I linked to.

But my last one 5yrs ago showed abnormal cells so i buried my head in the sand. and now after reading some of your experiences I am panicking badly

Mumcentreplus · 19/10/2010 00:12

@LES

Original poster

ChristmasTrulyReigns · 19/10/2010 00:14

Sorry LadyEven.

I hoe it helps that 3 of us are definitley going to make that important appointment tomorrow.

OP posts:

TheLadyEvilStar · 19/10/2010 00:18

Christmas, please do. My friend is waiting to go into hospital and I would hate to see anyone else go through what she is atm.

I am sure I and all of you will be fine.

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