To mind that my SIL and niece don't like me?

[NorhamGardens]

I've got reason to believe my SIL doesn't like me, without going into too much detail she seems to think I am trying to compete with her financially and otherwise. I think this from a few of the comments she's made. Believe me, again without going into too many details, I couldn't even if I wanted to! She's intellectually very smart and a great Mum. I would actually like to be a lot closer to her. I just get the feeling she doesn't warm to me at all. . She doesn't really know me a well as I'd like, she's a very private person.

My niece is 15, nearly 16. I am extremely fond of her. She's my brothers child and I've loved her to bits for as long as I can remember. We don't get to see them much as I'd like as they live a long way off, we used to be neighbours when the kids were growing up. I've enjoyed helping her through some various challenges along the way and she's stayed with me and we've had real fun together, or so I thought. She gets along well with my older children.

In the past my niece and I have spent lots of time together, shopping trips, going to Oxford and London together for meals that sort of thing. We've had a great deal of fun.

Sadly I am sensing that her mother's dislike (which I don't think I am imagining) is beginning to rub off.

My brother had a milestone Birthday recently and I overheard my niece telling her mother (my SIL) she really didn't want to sit next to me. I challenged her, in a joking way, and my niece just looked at me in a bored 'whatever' sort of a way. I was really shocked and hurt by this. I was also surprised her mother didn't pull her up (but perhaps she did later in private)?

I've just invited my niece to stay for a weekend during half term with our family and she's turned us down. I won't push it, but previously we had a great Aunt/Niece relationship and I had hoped that this would continue and develop. What can I do and AIBU to have cried tears over my nieces comments?

You'll have seen Harry Enfield's 'Kevin the Teenager' act? No matter how lovely and pleasant they are, they get to a stage where everyone older than them is not worth sitting next to or spending the weekend and everything's all so whatever. I would relax and wait for it to pass.

Thanks :), I wondered if that was it, hopefully I am reading too much into this then?

I think you shouldn't take it personally. SIL might have been embarrassed at her daughter's 'not sitting next to you' act, but it's not something you're going to argue the toss with a stroppy teen about at a party. ('You will sit next to Auntie NorhamGardens my girl! You will!' V uncool) Probably the child was furious at having to attend the party in the first place... wasting time with embarrassing old fossils when she could be on Facebook. It happens and they grow out of it eventually. Remain the cool Auntie, give her some space & she'll be back when she emerges from her teens!

I like to think I am still youthful and cool enough to want to be sat next to? Probably deeply deluded :).

I wouldn't have been able to roll my eyes and cheeked a relative to their face! I wouldn't have dreamed of doing that (however dull I privately found them). We were all so well mannered, it was drummed into us. Sigh, how the times have changed, obviously a old codger. :).

Some kids do become foul when they hit the teenage years. My cousin wouldn't talk to anyone (including her own brother) when she hit the teenage years. She's okay now though.

YANBU to be hurt by it though. Maybe you could discuss it with your brother and see what he says.