To think my local Surestart centre is a hellhole

[passionberry]

Or am I being PFB and maybe a bit snobby?

We have just moved house to a different part of the country and it's a quite an affluent area.

Where we lived before (up North) I used to go to my local Surestart centre loads - baby matters course, stay and play and a young mums group. It was lovely, clean and the staff were great.

TBH I expected the same here, if not better, but omg it was soo depressing. It smelled of wee, the loos were out of order and the worst thing was that the play mats had stains on them and the toys were filthy. I probably am being totally PFB but I couldn't bring myself to let dd touch them

AND when we did singing at the end, there was a smell of poo - and everyone laughed but no one checked to see which child it was!!

And all the kids had colds and/or gammy eye (not sure what medical term is) and I'm not surprised if no one ever gives the toys a wipe over.

Huh. I am and wish I could go home to our old town where everything was nice.

isn't there another you could use? they're meant to be about 10 feet next to each other aren't they

There are 8 different ones in my town, and I've been to them all, they are absolutely invaluable. Met my group of mum friends there, our 2 friends who had severe PND went to a brilliant support group there, I just love them. I would vehemently oppose their closure under the current government, as they are a vital community resource.

But they are only as good as their manager I'd say, our town centre one isn't great, some of the toys are battered and it's a bit grim, another is welcoming, bright, friendly and immaculately kept (was first one to open in country too).

Maybe you can give them some feedback to the people in charge? Hopefully they will listen, I always give suggestions to ours even though they are already good but if you have any suggestions come to mind they should be open to listening to it. Must be quite disappointing to come from a good centre to such a rubbish one! Maybe being in an affluent area not that many people use it so the service is getting a bit neglected?? I would see if there are any other better ones in your borough and give your feedback and suggestions and hopefully they will take it on board and improve.

eyw,sounds grim...i'd say somthing.i've only ever been to one grotty one..took ddand they did cooking,and the women running it didn't gt the kids to wash hands first!surely the first rule in a kitchen...i was saying quietly out corner of my mouth to dd "don't eat it!"

this title tickled me, then worried me im from up north and moving down south soon, dont want to move anyways so you have my attention now i always had a pre - concieved idea of surestart until i went i have to say ive been impressed with my local one, but things may change!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xx

YANBU. I live in a nice area and would have to cross town to get to one. It is in a ghetto-tastic area so thanks but no thanks!

Well....aren't they usually in the less well off areas? That's what they're for...to support those who may have less resources in terms of cash and family. Look on this link... en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sure_Start

not saying that poor people smell of wee...if that were the case then I would be pretty stinky...or that Surestart has an excuuse to be manky...but they're definately there to support families with challeges in terms of cash.

YABU to suggest "and the kids are all scummy and diseased too!"

but YANBU to not get a good feeling about a place. I've been to several surestarts round here and they are all ACE! Clean, friendly, useful etc. The centres in ghettotastic areas are just as nice, if not nicer than less ghetto places.

I think feedback is a good idea. It sounds like the place is losing its way somewhat.

I pay way too much council tax can't be doing with venturing into the ghetto though. Plus what if my dc are mugged for their Boden trousers?

I think our local one has had a 'chav drive' and rounded up the parents that Mash has, quite rightly, pointed out were the target families for Sure Start.Two parents were politely asked not to smoke as they lit up INSIDE and gave a mouthful of abuse to the person who'd asked them not to,one father shouted to another child to stop effing picking on his son and to top it all I was called an effing c... when I mentioned that I was a teacher.Are the staff worried that the centres will close if they do not hit 'target attendance' by these wasters?

Complain!

There is a large element of having to hit the target 'audience' dexie, especially with the new government wanting to slash our budget by in excess of 25%.

Can't have the 'sharp elbowed middle classes' like HalfTermHero invading now can we?

Am not meaning that seriously btw HTH - I work at a Centre and the changes since May are frankly bloody terrifying.

Having had a disabled child himself I'd have though David Cameron of all people would realise that you don't have to be 'ghettotastic' or living on the breadline to struggle with parenting - special needs, PND and family breakdown do not diffentiate according to your job or bank balance.

Sorry chaps - rant over - have obviously been needing to get that out of my system .

dexifehatz, surestart centres are aimed at improving the lives and opportunities of 'hard to reach' children, so, yes, these 'wasters' are the target audience. Whilst the centres are open to the whole community, they will, and should make an effort to attract people who may not know about parenting, healthy eating etc, sometimes because they themselves did not have good role models in their own families.

they are not just for free baby massage.

Sorry OP - yanbu to think that about the Centre you describe - it does sound pretty grim. Have you thought about volunteering if you feel that strongly about it - they'd probably bite your arm off!

FWIW the Centre I work at is also in the South and is lovely (not that I'm biased or anything!).

My ghetto sure start is quite nice

dexifehatz I don't believe you

Rooby - you have a point - reaching the families you mention is a priority. We do a bloody good job of it where I work, but over the last few months we are having to focus our services more tightly and limit some of the things we used to have on offer to the wider community.

As a result there are, if not exactly middle class, then more affluent working class families, who are missing out on the support and companionship they need/want for any number of reasons beyond being 'hard to reach'.

MrsLucas....but middle classes can go to other groups...in a more affluent area it is fair to assume there will be a well attended and well run church playgroup for instance.

Less affuent areas will be generally less community driven...or community minded.

True Mash, but if, for example, you are a middle class mum, maybe having just moved to an area with no family or friends and you find yourself suffering with PND, or your baby has a disability or health problems - whilst any playgroup type session may provide company they wouldn't necessarily be able to offer the same quality of advice and support that Surestart Centre could.

My own experience when I had my daughter 6 years ago (and I wouldn't describe myself as middle class or living in an affluent area btw- I guess we are just orinary suburban types), was that groups were fairly few and far between (I was also limited by being a p/t working mum so certain days were out), cliquey and not particularly well supervised.

It's totally right that Surestart should be everything to support the families facing the most challenges, but I do feel it's a bit blinkered to assume that everyone with a certain income, or living in a certain type of area is either not going to need support or be able to find it for themself.

I don't think there's an assumption the middle classes don't need support...but the dta suggests there's less risk...and with limited cash...well they have to put it where it's most needed. Did you speak to your doctor or Hv when yu had bad time?

The Centre round the corner from me (where I work) didn't exist when I had DD 6 years ago. I saw 1 midwife the day after I came out of hospital - she stayed about 3 minutes, then no-one until the HV came for my 3 month check and I was diagnosed with PND. The Dr who saw me as a result of that check up said that I was basically a week or so away from ending up in a mother and baby psych unit had the anti-depressants not
worked so fast. It was such a struggle getting from one end of the day to the other the thought of even attempting to find church/community centre groups or join the NCT (which didn't appeal to me anyway)wouldn't have even crossed my mind!

My HV was fantastic from then on and I wasn't completely without family support, but the whole experience affected me in terms of bf, bonding with dd (not now - we have a fab relationship )and heavily influenced by decision not to have another child.

Having worked at our Surestart Centre for nearly a year now, I'm pretty sure that if that support had been available (even though we wouldn't be considered 'hard to reach') I'd not only have had an easier time with DD, but would probably have been confident enough to have tried for another baby, so it would have made a huge difference to me and my family.

Hello, OP here.

My issues weren't to do with the area the centre was in, I understand that the centres are usually in more deprived areas - my issues were to do with the cleanliness of the centre and the fact that it was really run-down (underfunded?)

Where I used to live, I attended two centres - one was in a very deprived estate but it was extremely clean and well run.

I found my local centres very supportive when I had dd - the first place I went on my own with her was the breastfeeding support group run by one of them.

I suspect that Firawla has it right. All the 4x4 mummies round here pay for private classes/groups and Surestart is underused and neglected which is a real shame.

I am getting the impression that there is more of a rich/poor divide down here!

I don't imagine this particular centre will improve dramatically as funding surely to be cut (has already bee cut?) - but they could at least run the toys under a hot tap!

Oh well - tumble tots here I come!

I think you are right re there being a 'divide' in who accesses Sure Start. Most people go to groups local to their homes as it lends itself to making local, 'like minded' friends who you then meet up with (at each others houses, local parks, cafes etc). All that said though, it is right that the centres are in poor areas. They cater for the people who might not otherwise bother with or be able to afford to do activities with their chidren. Baby massage and baby signing for all, I say .

where are you? if you're in london there's probably a newer, nicer SS ctr not far away, they've been building them like crazy where we are (SW burbs), some are nicer than others

FWIW don't think you're being PFB at all. We moved to a different country when DD1 was 2.5, no toddler groups at all so took DDs to various gym/music classes and was APPALLED at the state of the equipment. One gym class was just horrific, the mats were covered in grime that you could scrape off with your fingernail. AND it was expensive!! We didn't go back after the free taster session.