To be going back to work after nearly six years

[lucysmumisgoingtowork]

and to feel a bit rubbish about it. Well no, to feel like shit about it, really.

Despite the fact that i have gotten a job that is term time only, could be a stepping stone into teaching, my DD is 5 and cock-a-hoop about going to breakfast club and having her gran or big sister (big sis is 20 btw) pick her up from school every day. Despite the fact that after six years of struggling financially i will be bringing some much needed funds into the house.

I have so many doubts, Im nervous of course about the job, but what scares me most is losing my identity. How mad is that - but i consider myself to be mummy, that wont stop will it?

Someone please come along and tell me to grow the hell up and get over myself. That we might even be able to go on holiday, pay off our debts and not have to worry whether or not the mortgage gets paid each month.

Then i come along the read the playground stereotype thread and think, oh no - im the absent mummy :(

You know you're doing the right thing.

A friend of mine hasn't worked for 16 years and although she comes up with silly excuses (she has to look after her horses all day ), it's obvious that she just doesn't have any confidence in herself or her abilities.

You, on the other hand, have proved that you have get up and go, and that you're brave enough to do something different.

Good on you, and I hope you enjoy your new job.

What do you mean "the absent mummy"

If you are a long standing poster than I have seen many of your threads about your financial difficulties so this is brilliant

You have also found the holy Grail of jobs - term time only!

You will enjoy it and your DD will be fine

It is a big change but a necessary one for you all

Anticipation is the worst part - after a week or so of the new routine you will all be fine

Good luck

Nonsense! It will be great for you to be getting some funds into the family that will make all your lives easier and I'm sure a new job will do wonders for your confidence

Good luck with it!

It will be great. You will still be mum, you will still be the most important person in your daughters life by far. And you will be you, you will have conversations not about childcare.

Thanks ruby, yep, im who you think i am :)

I know its the right thing, but you should know the "reasons" i have come up with all this week for not accepting the job

"absent mummy" was a term used on the other thread for a mummy who doesnt do pick up or drop off, it was used by a postor to describe herself i think so not derrogatory, but that will be me and i have to say, im very sad about that but my DD doesn't seem to care .

One thing though, i will "throw a sicky" on school play day!