11 year old on train alone...

[moraldisorder]

Am I being unreasonable to have put the 11 year old (1st year of secondary) On the train for a 2 stop/ 10 minute journey.

She felt comfortable with it and I waited for the train to arrive in order to literally place her on it. Then asked her to call me once she had arrived, which she did.

Too young? Unreasonable?

Mine have been on trains alone sinCe they were younger than that.

YANBU

Going down in history as my very first unaninimous 'YANBU'!!

Not surprising-it is a bit like asking 'does your 11yr old go on the school bus alone'-I bet it is the general way that they all do the journey.

YANBU - have done the same with my DD who is only just 11 and in year 6. Her Godmother lives two train stops away from us. I put her on the train. Godmother meets her off the train. DD loves it and feels very grown up.

This time next year she will likely be doing this same journey in the opposite direction, through the busy (main, not local) train station and doing a ten minute walk to secondary school at the other end...THIS I am pretty freaked out about not quite as comfortable with yet, but I have a year to calm down about it...

Who has suggests that this is not reasonable, OP? Just wondering what has prompted your post...? (Sorry - may have missed this as skimmed the thread...ignore me if necessary!)

MPD

I used to do a 4 stop tube journey (Brixton to Pimlico) at the same age.

YANBU.

My kids walk 40 min to 1 hour to school, or occasionally take the bus. When I've traveled home by train I frequently see kids travelling 1/2 hour or more. It is very normal around here, especially for the private schools. (Its actually why we feel a bit shocked when one of my daughter's friends was banned from having a phone until 16, most have them for safety's sake.)

Course not.

Assuming you have a NT averagely-mature 11 yr old it might even be overly-protective/smothering/generally unhelpful to not let her do it.

Should be perfectly OK, I used to travel to school on the train from 11, and see plenty of children doing so today.

But I have also seen this notice:
we will not allow any child under the age of 12 to travel without an adult aged 16 or over. If our staff do believe that a child under that age is travelling alone, the British Transport Police will be called for assistance
on a leaflet at my local train station.

Which seems pretty clear cut - some train companies state they will call transport police if they suspect your 11 year old is travelling alone.

Though tbf I have never actually seen them stake out a group of unaccompanied Y7's on their way to school in the autumn term, so perhaps they have a modicum of common sense.

At least other train companies are more sensible:

eg There is no required age set down by First Great Western.
The responsibility and decision lies with the parent or guardian of the child.
However we do advise that staff will not be able to watch over any child travelling alone.

Might be worth checking your local train operator's website, the one above was c2c.

'we will not allow any child under the age of 12 to travel without an adult aged 16 or over. If our staff do believe that a child under that age is travelling alone, the British Transport Police will be called for assistance'

Oh FGS. Talk about the nanny state.

One would trust that the BTP would tell the TOC to fuck off. In those terms. Because the BTP wouldn't have a legal leg to stand on, and have better things to do with their time.

That a TOC has the money to print notices like that, and the management time to plan them, shows that the comprehensive spending review can't cut their subsidy soon enough.

Agreed. If a train operator had summoned the BTP to 'deal' with my well-behaved and sensible kids on a train I would have been livid.

Cannot believe those leaflets. At 11, my mum put me on a train from Kings Cross to York along with my DSis (9) and DBro (8). We made it to York, and back again, in one (well, three) safe pieces.

My DTs will need to catch a train each day (10 min journey)to go to intermediate school when they are 11. I certainly won't be going with them! They are looking forward to being more independent and lots of DCs round here do the same (though we are not in UK, are in NZ), so YANBU.

YANBU. It would be nuts not to allow it, assuming a fairly average 11 year old. I did an hour's commute into Central London at that age and I was a particularly dippy and disorganised 11 year old.

"we will not allow any child under the age of 12 to travel without an adult aged 16 or over. If our staff do believe that a child under that age is travelling alone, the British Transport Police will be called for assistance"

How ridiculous! Secondary schools expect children to make their own way to school and most children will not have had their 12th birthday at the start of Yr 7.

Her mother was claiming she had read online that it was 'illegal' to let a child travel anywhere alone under the age of 16 and as such we are irresponsible and neglectful...
Her idea of parenting is to keep DD wrapped in cotton wool until her 16th birthday and then release her..! I can only imagine if we all did that... children falling on to train tracks en masse like lemmings..

YANBU.

DD has been travelling on school bus alone since Y3.

She will DEFINITELY be getting herself to school alone in Y7.

What is the name of the train company who say 12yo's can't travel alone. They are frankly barking!

What kind of nutter would not allow a DC to travel unaccompanied unti the age of 16? FFS, in 2 years from that they will probably be at college, living independently. How are they supposed to cope with that if they can't use public transport without help?

I don't know why train travel is seen as particularly difficult, surely it is easier than travelling by bus as all the stops have clear signs so you know where you are?

Moral - that mother sounds like some of the smothering parents my DM had to cope with when ashe worked in a student accomodation office. One mother came to complain that her DD had not left her room in a week as no-one knocked on her door to tell her where she needed to go - apparently she thought my DM should have gone round to hold her hand!

"Her mother was claiming she had read online that it was 'illegal' to let a child travel anywhere alone under the age of 16"

Yeah, every morning the police stop all the buses in every city and tell all the children who aren't in the sixth form to get off. Didn't you know?

The station's at one end of campus, the local big-money grammar schools are at the other end. An awful lot of children walk across campus to get from the one to the other, and the police immediately stop them, get their details and arrest their parents. Happens every day.

Ah, I see thet mother is your DPs ex. Nuff said.

"What is the name of the train company who say 12yo's can't travel alone. They are frankly barking!"

The train company is ctc - the line goes through Barking, actually, on the way to Southend & Shoeburyness!

I was sure I'd seen a leaflet quoting 14 as the age children should travel alone, which made me but I must have imagined it.

Ooh, no, it was a British Transport Police www.btp.police.uk/passengers/advice_and_information/travel_wise.aspx advice leaflet

Children under 14 who travel by rail should be accompanied wherever possible.

but at least they say:
For those who have to make journeys alone, whether travelling to and from school or to visit relatives, it is vital to take steps to ensure their protection.

So they don't forbid under-14's after all, and sound like they might give short shrift to any busybody who phoned to report an 11 year old.

The safety advice is fairly sensible, still a bit that they think 13 is too young to be trusted to catch a train on your own though.