to refuse to bite my tongue

[nancydrewrocked]

I pulled into a carpark and stopped to allow a car to finish manouvring out of a tight spot in front of me.

Within 20 seconds there was a driver behind me beeping and gesticulating at me. I pointed to the car which by now was visible to the car behind me but the driver continued.

When I went to purchase my ticket he stood behind me , normally I have a tendancy to harumph in passive aggressive style and then spend afternoon thinking of clever retorts I should have said so I turned round and in my sweetest voice said "you really should learn to use your manners".

Chap started shouting at me telling me that I was blocking his way and he couldn't pull in off road. I explained I was using my manners to allow the woman in front of me to pull out (if I hadn't we'd all have been a bit gridlocked) and suggested he used his in future.

I will admit to sounding very patronising. He was probably my fathers age (early 60's) and I spoke to him as if he was my 5 year old i.e. calmly, slowly, no swearing but very deliberately.

He kept on repeating I was blocking his way at which point his wife got out of the car and really starts at me tlling me how rude I am and how dare I confront her husband since I was at fault blah blah blah. I replied "like your husband you clearly have no manners either". I accept this was deliberately provocative.

She was wagging her finger in my face and was clearly livid. I was starting to feel a little shakey and since I am obviously pregnant and she was still right in my face I walked away and then said over my shoulder "you are ridiculous".

I was then approached by another lady who had been standing about 20metres away who I assumed was coming to ask if I was OK but she "told me off" for not respecting my elders and that I should have held my tongue.

I wasn't abusive I didn't raise my voice - so was I BU to confront him on his aggreesive behaviour.

They all sound mad. And good for you for taking someone to task, there are too many rude people around.

YANBU, well done. I'm a bit older than you (pushing 50) and although one should, of course, respect one's elders there's no need to accept offensive bullshit.

Folk who are wankers when they're young, are often still wankers as they age.

Good for you. People who think they have the right to be aggressive and abusive to anyone with the audacity to get in their way deserve an ear bashing IMO.

Well done for keeping your cool. I wouldn't have been so polite.

no yanbu why should you accept rude behaviour just because they are old??

Thanks - feel vindicated!

They were well dressed, in newish car - Terribly judgemental of me but was a bit suprised at their aggression when confronted.

Wound me up that they thought it acceptable to be so aggressive when in the confined safety of their car. I mean you don't start shouting at the person in front of you when they let someone out of the lift or through a door ahead of you do you?!

Hope the shakes have gone now !
You sound to have done a great job, and with dignity

Some people are just downright bloody rude and very brave when they're tucked up safe in their car. I bet they'd have reacted differently if you'd been a massive bloke instead of a pregnant woman.

Good for you, I stand with the above comments. It can be really alarming how people react to situations and disheartening how they do not just shrug it off i.e. accept with good grace they were in the wrong, just for a moment. Hope your day improved

Well done for being so controlled ! I fear I may have reverted to screaming banshee mode when the wife piped up

I got this this morning as well - an idiot pulled out in front of me then slammed on his breaks and got out of his car to start screaming at ME! I think something about cars sends people a bit nuts - we have POLICE OFFICERS outside our school patrolling parking issues at the moment which is frankly ridiculous. Well done for not going batty and YANBU.

Rude, old people are just rude, young people who've aged. I think that respect is something you give, until a person proves themselves to be unworthy of it.

Agree, that they would not have been so mouthy if you had been a big man and there was a chance he could have been given a right hander!

Oh, you are my new hero!

I usually do the passive aggressive thing then think of the perfect retort about 3 hours later.

YADNBU

Altinkum I was hardly putting myself in danger - it was broad day light in an open car park. There were plenty of people around and it was fairly unlikely that they were going to whip out a knife.

I live in surrey and she was weari a twinset and perals FFS!

Nope YWNBU, you were being very restrained.

I had a similar one a couple of days ago. I'd come back from walking one dog to find 13 yo DD out in the front garden talking to friends and so apparently not preventing the other 2 dogs from barking. I gathered this as the wanker man next door suddenly appeared and appro pros of nothing started shouting at me to "stop those bloody dogs barking, those bloody dogs..." yada yada yada.

I watched him going a satisfyingly purple colour as I quietly, calmly and in my very best of well spoken accents saved just for the purpose told him that it wasn't necessary to swear and yell, and that I wasn't doing it was I?

Then I really pissed him off by asking him very politely not to swear at me and that I would only consider his comments when he was prepared to approach me in a civil manner, before I walked indoors... adding a "please" and a "Sir".

Tosser! :o

Yay You!!

Well done on speaking out. They were totally in the wrong, you weren't.

At least there are some people out there with manners.

valhalla

That is exactly why I was so polite - it actually gets to people far more than if you shout.

I was actually desperate to say "you are being ridiculous madam " but don't think I could have got it out with a straight face.

Oh and I was also using my saved for these occassions very best accent!