to blame the fucking NHS.

[JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns]

My grandma was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer in March, we discovered it had spread to her adrenal (sp) glands and were given around 6mnths.

she was offered treatment after my aunt made some inquiries and a bit of a fuss, after chemo, and one intesive radiotherapy the tumour shrank by 2cm by 2cm.

Her consultant was overjoyed as this was a 'miracle'

then a few weeks ago she couldnt talk, and had the symptoms of a mild stroke, after some appointments (im unsure of what went on) they decided a brain scan was the best idea.

and discovered over 10 little tumours all over her brain, we have weeks, 3 months at best.

it turns out the cancer started there then spread to her lung

AIBU to think when a patient has cancer they should check EVERYWHERE to ensure they are treating and doing everything they can.

her consultant felt the need to say if theyd found it back in march/april there is a high chance it could have been treated, or atleast controlled.

now there is nothing they can do

i am really sorry you have had this terrible news. i don't think it is normal practise to check the whole body for cancer if it is found in the one place. i think there would had to have been symptoms.

Sorry - that is awful for you and your family.

Just wondering if it might be best for you to focus on your grandma and the rest of your family at the moment, and perhaps put your (understandable) anger to one side. I know it's easier said that done.

Yanbu. I'm so sorry this has happened unmumsnetty ((((hugs))))

Sorry to read about your grandma. It's a terrible situation.

I always defend the NHS as a whole though. It's world-class and I feel very lucky to be able to access it.

.

I'm not sure what they do with regards to checking the whole body for cancer. My dad's was technically in his prostate but it had spread to his bones (and possibly his glands, I've forgotten) and once I knew that I figured his time was short.

shed been to the doctors on numerous occasions in the past year-18mnths as shed had trouble with fine motor skills/memory and stuttering, overnight it got worse and suddenly this

our family doctor realised and put her forward for a brain scan not her (usually amazingly brilliant consultant)

i just wish they hadnt told us they could have 'fixed' it 6mnths ago

I am so sorry about her too. I too always defend the NHS though. It is world class and we are lucky to have it.

I don't know how old she is but by the time they found it, she already had it in her lung, brain and adrenal glands. Once it's spread, the prognosis is usually bad. So it had already spread by the time they found the lung cancer. It's all if's buts and maybes.

The consultant himself said that they might have been able to control it.

It's best to focus on the time you have left with her rather than being angry.

oh and shed had a whole body scan, the only place they didnt look was the only place riddled, its just all to unfair ridiculous and upsetting.

tbf the nhs has been fantastic i just feel like maybe they dropped the ball and someone someone could have noticed, i dont know.

she is 63

and was working 40hr weeks as a carer until 4mnths ago she was fitter and healthier than me!

I'm really sorry you're going through this and it's understandable to be angry. Unfortunatly I don't think it's always that simple to check every single part of the body. When my uncle had cancer it was the secondary cancer that they found and they never actually managed to find the "original" cancer.

I think that specific cancers tend to metastasize to specific places. Prostate tends to go to the bones for example. To scan every part of a body would be very costly.
Sorry to hear of your grandma's bad health. Try to make the most of what time she has left.

I've no idea of the answer to your OP although I'd feel as you do.

I'm just vvery sorry to read of this. Having been in a similar situation with my own Nanny I maybe know how unhappy and angry you are feeling. Grandmothers are precious people. Try to make the most of the time you have ahead.

Val x

Such a sad time for your family.

I agree with pp's in the fact we are very lucky to have the NHS really.

Enjoy the time you have left and keep strong for your nanny.

B X

YABU. It is impossible to check the whole body for cancer in every single case. And that cancer was going to spread no matter what they did. I was a staff nurse on an NHS medical ward and we saw this stuff a lot.

Many times they cannot treat the secondaries because they can't find the primary even with many scans. It hides. My MILs ovarian ca didn't show up on multiple scans. She had scan after scan and it never showed up. But it was there all a long.

Cancer is the beast. I watched a 30 year old mum die two nights ago. It isn't the NHS that is bad. Cancer is bad. It sucks.

The NHS does a half decent job a lot of the time considering how much the government starves the front line services of cash. The ward I worked on was barely functioning in the end.

So sorry.

You are quite right to be upset, of course you are, but I imagine that this was a cancer that was so rife that even if she had been scanned in the right place and at the right time, there would have been little that could be done.

My friend's wonderful Mum had a similar thing- bit of backache, nothing much. Eventually after months of niggles they found secondary cancer on her lung. They never did find the primary one I don't think.

I agree that particularly when compared to other countries, the NHS takes a lot of beating.

Love her dearly for the time you have

Blaming the NHS because cancer is such a nasty nasty insidious disease is NR but I appreciate why you feel that way.

Your DG's con probably thought he was being honest but his honesty and openess has caused more upset. :(

Love the time you have together and put the anger to one side.

Kreecher is right. My dh is an oncologist and there is no way they could do a whole body scan for everyone.

Unfortunatley brain mets is usually the end of the line anyway and there very little they can do other than palliative care. My bill mum was diagnosed with lung cancer and also had brain mets which they missed. I don't think it is that uncommon.

Very sorry for you. Big hugs.

JJ, I am so sorry to hear your news.

I think it was right of your consultant to be straight with you about the fact that they missed the primary.

One of the earlier posters was right in saying that cancers tend to spread in particular patterns. It is, I think, unusual for lung cancer to spread to the adrenal glands, which might have rung alarm bells.

Lungs, like bones and lymph glands are a common place for secondaries.

Sometimes biopsies can be helpful in working out where the primary is, but sometimes it can make matters worse, by seeding cancer cells.

I would say that what you need to do now is support your grandmother in her choices. If she wants support in making a complaint or getting an explanation then it is her body and she should have it. Otherwise, enjoy the time you have with her as much as you can. It is difficult, but, as someone who lost my father very suddenly in an accident, it can also be special.

If you want to take things further later on then AvMA (Action Against Medical Accidents) is a charity which can advise and support you, either with the complaints procedure or with litigation. However, given that you were dealing with a tumour which had already spread to lungs and adrenals, it would probably be difficult and in the end litigation just gives you money, and that, I suspect, is not what you are looking for.

Thinking of you

So sorry to hear your news.

From a legal perspective the test is whether another practitioner would have come to a similar conclusion. I guess you could look at husky's response and say that another practitioner would have thought the same thing.

I agree that now is not the time to be worrying about whether someone is to blame - enjoy the time you have left with her.

we had a long appointment with her consultant today,
i feel better, and i know i BU blaming nhs, i was just so angry after wed had some fantastic news that things could crash down so badly so quickly.

she is strong and prepared to fight and has opted to do a trial of radio and steroids, so we can only hope it makes a difference, and if it doesnt we can hope it helps someone in our position in years to come.

thanks for your kind words