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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

to disgusted that someone in my family wrote this?

25 replies

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:14

"has anyone just watched dont tell the bride. yuk."

and then "it was a gay couple yuk yuk"

it was on FB i want to delete them of my friends list now. infact, I'm going to. really disappointed, i thought they were a nice person.

OP posts:

bigchris · 06/10/2010 21:15

Oh I watched that episode last night
they were a lovely couple, so well suited I thought
yanbu

cupcakesandbunting · 06/10/2010 21:16

YANBU

That would make me flare up like a London derby.

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:16

i watched it too last night. i thought it looked like a great wedding. disappointed that teh guy didn't get a decent suit but he didn't seem to mind in the end. tehy were lovely.

OP posts:

ValiumSingleton · 06/10/2010 21:17

Instead of deleting them, post what bigchris said 'they were a lovely couple'. I don't think you can 'delete' your family really...

stainesmassif · 06/10/2010 21:17

yes, definitely delete. it's very freeing.

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:19

i have just deleted them. i will tell why if asked.

OP posts:

rantyknickers · 06/10/2010 21:19

My nephew joined that group during the world cup about banning England shirts in pubs - something about banning turbans.

Anyway, I wrote very publicly on his wall what an idiot he was for holding such bigoted and ill-informed views and tore a strip off him when I saw him too.

Difficult if you are not an 'elder' I suppose though

bigchris · 06/10/2010 21:20

I'd go further and comment 'i had no idea you were homophobic'

AlgebraKnocksItUpANotchBAM · 06/10/2010 21:22

you should've just commented "why is it 'yuk'?"

but YANBU obviously. can't believe people are homophobic at all, let alone are so comfortable with that attitude that they broadcast it online. jeez.

TotalChaos · 06/10/2010 21:23

yanbu

cupcakesandbunting · 06/10/2010 21:24

I'd go further and comment 'i had no idea you were homophobic'

That is excellent :)

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:24

bigchris i would love too but i am not confrontational and this person is very much a favourite in the family, i would be the person to get strips tore off me if i dared speak out. sadly homophobia seems totally acceptable to some of the family and while others quietly (like me) disapprove (of the homophobia), it really wouldn't have any effect to call them on it, except cause a huge family row that i don't need right now.

OP posts:

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:28

would it be very PA of me to post something in my status about homophobia? of course i would have to add this person again for tehm to see it and it would be very obvious what i had done then wouldn't it? i could just post it anyway, might make everyone else look at their own actions.

OP posts:

TiggyD · 06/10/2010 21:39

It's pretty common you know. And people who are fine with it are sometimes a bit to keen to appease homophobic people. I've been told to butch up a bit at work so I don't worry any customers at the nursery I worked in.

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:41

really tiggy? they asked you to butch up so as not to worry people? why would a gay person be a worry to anyone?

OP posts:

HarrietTheSpy · 06/10/2010 21:44

Family 'acting out' on Facebook with homophobic and right wing malarky is such a nuisance.

TiggyD · 06/10/2010 21:44

Because there were children around, and you know what queers are like.

Lavitabellissima · 06/10/2010 21:45

YANBU. I would make a comment when I saw them, you could do it in a subtle way.

I thought they were a lovely couple, but felt a bt sorry for the guy not getting his suit, and the fact the best man totally took over. I'm looking forward to next week, it's such a funny programme.

cupcakesandbunting · 06/10/2010 21:47

You queers. Pffft. Can never keep your mitts of the kiddies, can you?

Not sure if the assumption that gay men are paedos is more alarming than just hating gays just because of where they stick their winky.

Knickers0nMyHead · 06/10/2010 21:48

YANBU.

Original poster

booyhoo · 06/10/2010 21:50

tiggy surely you can do something about that? does that not fall under sexual discrimination or something?

i think i might post that as my status lavitabellilissima.

OP posts:

Heracles · 07/10/2010 02:36

The fact they were watching a BBC3 programme would be reason enough for me to (a) delete them from FB and (b) push dog poo through their letterbox.

Try it; it's terribly theraputic.

TryLikingClarity · 07/10/2010 07:28

Boo - you are a lovely person, but please don't get your knickers in a twist about FB!

Putting up different updates so someone can see is very passive aggressive and might make you seem a bit silly.

I am not a FB fan in any way, shape or form.

It's sad that your relation doesn't feel the same as you do, but maybe FB isn't the place to educate him.

onmyfeet · 08/10/2010 02:31

If you do say something, do it privately through a message, rather than publicly.

Original poster

booyhoo · 08/10/2010 14:45

i have deleted her from my friends list. i don't want a row, but i still don't want to have to read crap like that when i log in. it also spurred me to delete soemone else who's status said, "good luck to any boys going out to afghanistan, hit them hard lads!"

OP posts:

Flip