Been reading these posts here for a while and not joined but, (don't you just love the buts)? But I felt I had to post as this has been going around my head for a while.
Started ages back when I met someone. He was as if, by chance there on the internet and we got chatting. Well after a couple of weeks we met. I was going through a really tough divorce he was lifing with his kids in a rented house.
So after a short while he had me taken in hook line sinker heart emotions everything he just blew my world 
I guess it was only about 6 weeks after meeting him but I was looking for somewhere to live and he said the obvious thing to do was live with him. So I guess bowled over by love???? I went with my heart and moved in with him. I guess looking back there were a few things 'odd' but chose to ignore them.
I discovered he had been made bankrupt but was now discharged so money was a touchy subject to him. well after a short while we decided to go together with our benefits he gets income support and I get incap benefit due to health problems. Well the dss messed it all up and he went without his benefit for a while so I met the bills with my money and then sold a collection I had to pay the rent because he was nervous so that was over £600. I also was trying to meet half the mortgage with my ex because I knew it was a matter of time before it was sold.
After a while we split but got back together again only this time we didn't tell social so he kept his income support anmd I kept my benefit.
Well as time went on I kept getting told 'it's my money don't tell me what to do with it' from my now dp so I guess I didn't even when he was spending it ridiculously. The trouble was he used to then start blaming me for not contributing to his family and saying it was all my fault for him being broke 
At one point I was trying to go to college but needed to pay for the course myself and this also seemed to be frowned upon by him. I only got a certain amount on incap whereas he got over three times more than me so I used to cringe when I saw him buying this and that you know silly things spending loads on takeaways and using the philosophy of 'I only worry about money when it's not there'.
Well he moved as he got place with council and so he got his deposit on the old place back now I just felt a bit miffed when he took the money and didn't even offer to give me a little bit back from what I had sold. (over £600) I wouldn't have taken anything but it was the principle he didn't even offer to even give me a tenner saylol I just thought 'oh well' we are in this together.
Well as time went by he got more and more 'short' with money (the deposit money he blew with the kids on stupid things) and I got the brunt of this
It all ended very nasty and he threw me out saying I was a user and then told everyone he possibly could that I was nothing more than a gold digger.
Sorry for the long post but AIBU for keep wondering what went so wrong?? I thought I had met 'THE ONE' in every other dept: life was brilliant and now it's like I am the one who has been villified for something I was told to stay quiet about?? Even now almost two years later he is still blaming me 
. So now all his friends think they know what's happened and I just feel still upset that the record was never put straight.
Sorry guys I hope you kept up with me. 