Not to say I love you to my in laws

[yellowflowers]

My in laws tell me they love me as a daughter and also whenever they call they say goodbye by saying I love you. It's very sweet but I don't feel I can say it back. I am not their daughter, I am their daughter in law, though I very much appreciate the sentiment. But I don't love them as parents though I like them as adults and respect them as my dh's parents and am fond of them in their own right. Is it wrong of me not to say 'I love you' back to them? I know I am very lucky to have this relationship with them - you don;t have to tell me that, but just wondered what you think about the 'love' thing.

annapolly - that's really sad & really sweet.

Yellowflowers - don't say it if you don't feel it, there's nothing wrong with 'me too' if it smooths things over :) However, as someone else said, don't close yourself off to loving them just because they aren't your parents - we can love lots of people, in lots of different ways.

Hi WannabeNigella,

No I don't love them. I am... fond of them I guess. I am thrilled they created my dh who I love dearly though I am often stunned how well he turned out given how different to them he is, and I truly appreciate that they like me and the obvious joy and love they have for their unborn grandchild already - but to be honest I find them a bit difficult and not 'my kind of people.' But they are inherently kind and they love their son (my dh) and are welcoming to me and I try to be a good daughter in law to them in return.

hello
I have a similar thing with my in laws. They live in a different country and consider themselves to be very religious. When I married my DH (their son) I automatically became part of their family and so get treated like their daughter even though I have spent very little time with them. His father actually gave me away at our wedding and he tells people I am his daughter. Whenever my DH speaks to his parents on the phone, specifically his father; he always makes a point of sending his love to me and my DD. I must admit I do find it a little odd and I certainly dont say it back to them but I put it down to different cultures.