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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask the school to stop the six formers smoking drugs on my drive?

36 replies

trice · 01/10/2010 10:34

We live a few doors down from a very good school. Since the beginning of term a small group of six formers have been hanging about on our drive at lunchtime smoking pot.

I went round to the school and spoke to the head who said that the next time it happened I should just call the police.

I don't want to criminalize children. I just don't think it is very good for their education if they are high in class. And I want them to stop dropping litter on my drive. And I worry about them setting a bad example to my dcs (although they are too young to realise that the boys are smoking drugs).

I know who the lads are but I didn't tell the head. I am not sure if I should have done so.

Am I being unreasonable to hope that this lunchtime the head will turn up and give the lads a rocket?

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 01/10/2010 10:36

No, I would just do what he says and call the police.

Chil1234 · 01/10/2010 10:36

You've not gone far enough to be taken seriously. Since a conversation with the head hasn't worked, write a letter of complaint to the headmaster & copy the LEA. Name the boys involved because they are well out of line. Call the police as well. They're just ignoring you at the moment and it's not unreasonable for you to expect action.

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:36

tell the boys yourself!! and tell them you havent seen their paents for a while and will have to have a 'catch up chat' with them soon....Grin

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:37

*parents!

FiveGoMadInDorset · 01/10/2010 10:37

They are not on school property so I can't see what the school can do, I would take his advice and call the police.

Serendippy · 01/10/2010 10:37

YABU. Would you ask the police to make sure kids do their homework?

If they are in 6th form they are 16+. If they are smoking drugs they are partaking in criminal activity. If they are the kind of children who smoke drugs just outside the school, do you really think they are the kind of children who are afraid of a HT?

If you want them to stop dropping litter on your drive and setting a bad example for your DCs, you will hav to talk to them.

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:41

how do you know....for sure....that its drugs??

ForgottenTomato · 01/10/2010 10:43

If you don't feel that you can talk to the kids yourself, then I'd just follow the head's advice and phone the police. That should put a stop to things for you.

nameymcnamechange · 01/10/2010 10:43

Have you tried saying "Please get off my drive"?

nameymcnamechange · 01/10/2010 10:44

Would people really call the Police over this???

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:44

the kids will be long gone before the police turn up,believe me,a report about kids smoking outside school will not have them attending quickly!!

maybe speak to your local officer,who could then also liase with the school?

Original poster
trice · 01/10/2010 10:47

I have spoken to them. They are nice lads really. I just think they are being silly and making bad choices.

I would imagine that the smoking is seriously affecting their school work. Don't you think their teachers should care? They must also be taking the drugs onto school grounds.

Obviously it is not a massive problem for me. But if I was the parent of these kids I would want to know.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:50

tell the parents then??

ForgottenTomato · 01/10/2010 10:50

I don't know. Where we used to live, the community support officer would probably be along very quickly to a report of this sort of thing. The community support team work very closely with the schools there to sort out this kind of thing. The community support officer made it his business to get to know the kids' names etc, and would be keen to have a word with any kids about stuff before it got to the point of needing a proper criminal investigation.

I really don't think the police are going to swoop in, drugs raid style, on your drive. It's more likely that the community support team will come along and speak to the kids and explain that this sort of thing can get them into trouble.

You could also tell the head who the kids are, as that way s/he can actually do something.

Original poster
trice · 01/10/2010 10:52

Whitecherry - I have smoked enough draw as a student to recognise a joint being passed around.

Nameymcnamechange - that is my point, I don't really see it as a criminal matter. I wouldn't dream of calling the police.

I would like to speak to their parents ideally I suppose. It would have been easier to go through the school though.

OP posts:
ForgottenTomato · 01/10/2010 10:52

to be honest, you can't stop the kids smoking, but you can get them to stop doing it on your drive/in your street etc.

Don't worry about their performance at school.

Chil1234 · 01/10/2010 10:53

We're talking about lunchtimes. Since you know who they are, the head could very easily confine these kids to the school premises at lunchtime for the rest of the term and it would solve the whole thing.

nameymcnamechange · 01/10/2010 10:55

Trice, would you have wanted an adult to speak to your parents about smoking spliff when you did it?

I really don't think it is any of your business, tbh, except the being on your driveway part.

Serendippy · 01/10/2010 10:55

You smoked as a student and survived then? The teachers will act if something is affecting school work, so don't use this as an excuse to get the school to deal with it. If you have talked to them and they are nice lads, sort it yourself. Soooooo fed up of people expecting schools to be social services/branches of the police force/litter inspectors.

LeninGrad · 01/10/2010 10:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 10:59

they are 6th formers....doubt they could be 'confined' as they can legally leave school anyway

Chil1234 · 01/10/2010 11:02

There's 'legal' and there's 'school rules'... which are much more arbitrary and flexible.

vbusymum1 · 01/10/2010 11:11

I'm not clear what the problem is, if you know the parents why not just say

"Look lads its none of my business if you smoke drugs but please don't do it on my drive, if you keep on I'll have to ask your parents to have a word with you"

Then they either move or you get the parents to get them to move. You say they are good kids so their parents are likely to make sure they don't do it outside your house again.

GypsyMoth · 01/10/2010 11:20

sounds reasonable to me vbusymum1

pushmepullyou · 01/10/2010 11:26

A group of my friends were caught smoking in the park next to college when we were in 6th form. Their parents were called in and the head confined them to the premises during school hours and even gave them an 11pm curfew in the evening whereby he could ring their houses and ask to speak to them and they were expected to be in.

Obviously they were not obligated to comply, but at 6th form the head is not obligated to keep you in school either. If they had not agreed to the conditions they would not have been allowed to stay at the college.