to want to smack the next person who says 'in MY day...

[Serendippy]

I keep hearing the older generation telling me that 'In my day, we lived on £300 a year and had no cars and phones and would have to do any job going for a bit of cash' and it makes me want to scream! I am no spring chicken, but still feel that the generation below me are going to be proportionally worse off. My MIL who insists on this type of story is the woman who took 5 years off work with children and MIL and FIL owned a house at 26 because although wages were low, house prices were too. At 31 I have only bought a house with DH (2 years older) 2 years ago despite the fact that we have both been working full time since 21/22. We had to beg and plead to get a mortgage despite no serious debts and as for 'do any job going to get a bit of extra cash', where are all these lovely cash-in-hand jobs now? If you need money til payday, tough. Even your employer cannot give you an advance anymore because of how everything is accounted for. I know your life was hard, but please stop telling me how easy my life is in comparison because it bloody isn't. (And yes, I do have a mobile and laptop etc but would much, much rather have been able to afford a house and not thrown £1000s away in rent over the years waiting to be 'acceptable'. Sorry, had to get that off my chest.

LRD, you forgot to add 'and our second homes were only small places by the sea, you kids don't know you're born!'

Do not actually have a second home, barely have one, so will probably be saying '2 homes, 2 homes, we only had one and we thought we were damn lucky, and we were only earning £18,000pa, blah blah blah...'

Yes, we were able to buy our houses - but when our kids were small, interest rates were a huge 15-17% so life wasn't that easy.

on the one side you have a generation who probably did work harder and save more to achieve a milestone such as home ownership. On the other side you have the victims of an overheated housing market who can't afford houses on average or even high wages.

the older generation should appreciate how much wealth they have generated for themselves from their housing.

the younger generation should maybe stop obsessing about home ownership and accept the cheaper option of renting for longer.

or wait for a crash ...

I am sorry but as a 45 yr old with parents born just before WWII I think we are incredibly lazy compared to their generation. I know that fewer women worked but for most of them that was because they were too damned busy! Mum made all our clothes, cooked everything from scratch, kept chickens, sheep and at one point, a pig, she grew all her own veg and fruit, spun and wove wool from her sheep. When dad wasn't at work he was gardening, fixing things around the house, they never 'got a man in' to do things. And that was normal amongst most of their friends. Self-sufficiency in as much as was humanly possible. It was a given that if something needed doing, they would do it themselves. They also accepted that if they couldn't make or grow something themselves, they probably would do without!

But yes, they had a lovely house and a big garden but it was bloody hard work.

We expect so much these days in terms of material things. I accept that house prices are stupid and my parents generation (and later) have profited enormously in a sense, but they worked hard and did without. And what profit will they really have? If they need to go into residential care, the value of their home will be dissipated to pay for it. Only fair of course but they haven't 'profited' in any real sense.

Each generation has it both harder and easier than the last generation.
Can't say I'd wan to be a 16 year old now. no free uni etc. But then in some ways they have it so easy.

Agree with most comments. Am happy with the time I live in, would not want to be the generation above or below. Just don't tell me how hard life was for you, I know you had your struggles but so do I.

(Not 'you' as in any of you in particular)

Im 26, i have owned my own home since i was 18, i have also owend a home in spain and lived out there for a while, i have made a little and lost a little, but have nothing to show for it other than fantasic experiences. I'm a SAHM to two children, my DH has a good job earning national average wages, we live in the midlands. We have a great life, loads of debt at moment, fuded said experiences and home improvements move across country etc, but its all payable.

I dont understand why people cant buy houses now until they are 40! we bought another one last week, will be moving in in a couple of months, selling this one, its not difficult. Perhaps you are aiming above your belt if you are syruggling so much just to get on the ladder.

We just paid 90k for a 4 bed with three reception rooms on one of the oldest roads in england, its a beautiful old house, loads of land, by high achieveing schools, - over the moon, it needs total redecoration but nothing 5k max wont fix. Life isnt as hard as it was way back when, our generation may have lost a few simple things from that by-gone age but we are so lucky compared the previous generations. We have more choice and more back up and more social systes in place than ever before, they may well not be working as well as we'd like, but they are there at least and thats more than before.

Baby, my DH has 14k of debt and earns minimum wage, and he doesn't have British nationality so can't get a credit card or a credit rating. He therefore cannot get a mortgage. I am a student with 14k of student loan, and I get a grant which is about 13k per year, which banks won't accept as 'wages'. I hope to earn some money teaching this year but am competing against around 30 students for one teaching course.

Sorry, I know you are trying to be encouraging and I know it is partly down to our choices (I could give up the studying and try to get a more basic job, but I would like to have a better standard of living one day, besides which there isn't a lot out there that would pay better than my grant).

I accept you and your DH must be great hard workers, but I honestly don't think I'm failing to buy a house because DH and I set our sights too high.

Bottom line for us is: no-one will give us a mortgage. If you 'don't understand why people can't buy houses', I expect that's one reason. I hope it'll change before we're 40 (!), but there is no way I could have got a mortgage at 18, esp. if I'd been with DH.

Well then it is solely down to your choices, you made other things your priority, which is great by the way do not knock uni at all, we made other thins our priority. We made a house our priority, I can't moan now that I don't have a degree, that I can't afford to go to uni, I will be able to in the future if thats what I want to do, but I am still processing my house priority. You are still processing your training priority. Can't have everyhin all at once, think that's most pooled problem tbh, mine included.

Really didn't mean to piss u off though, sorry.

Baby - where do you live to get somewhere so nice for £90k.

My crap heap of a house cost £250k and it's awful - damp, cold, sluggy, no 'land' .

I want what you have

No, it's not solely our choices! That makes me really angry.

Unless you mean that when I was 18, I should have gone out and found some rich older guy to sort me out with a mortgage, it isn't down to choice. On my own, I might have been able to save up for a mortgage, but DH can't. No amount of work - in this country - was going to change that for him. He couldn't get leave to stay without a degree, and he can't get a credit card now.

I understand you're not trying to annoy me and I am very glad I had the opportunity to go to university, but it is glib to make out that every 18-year-old could own a home if only they 'chose' to.

Sorry, didn't mean that to be so much of a rant but I am really tired of people knocking me for studying (which I know you weren't at all, Baby). Recently a friend of DH's told me that getting my student grant was like getting benefits when you're not eligible for them, and a load of people on AIBU piled in to tell me how lazy/lucky I was. I think I was thinking of that when I got posted there.

Sorry .

Babydubs, how did you buy a house at 18? Surely you did not raise a deposit from a saturday job? How did you get a mortgage?

Also second Laurie, where do you live? When I was looking at houses it was around £200k for 3 bed near good schools.

OrmRenewed - you put it very eloquently. Our parents generation possessed many self sufficient skills that sadly have not been passed on. Feminism, angst, I feel it's going full circle.

Me and my (then) Dp took out a loan to fund deposit, and then got the mortgage. Nothing tricky! he wasnt a rich older guy either, he was round my age and worked. I worked. I worked two jobs actually but that makes it sound like i was working hard, wasnt really, minimum wage clerical job and asda on the night, because i enjoyed it and that became our fun money. DP was on the building, okay wage, not loads at that age with no experience though. We had csa to pay for his previous kiddies, who also lived with us half the time, bought a two up two down with small garden for 65k, sold it a year later for 85k, we did loads of superficial work, but it was a mess when we bought it.

Did the same again with the next place. Divorced the knobhead. Rented a flat with now DH, rented another house, bought a place in spain, whilst still renting uk, (my parents lived by there) moved out there for a bit, shit street with no money coming in, got loans from uk to pay for living, had a great time. moved back here. rented for a while. Went into big half rent half buy, double fronted three bed in a lesser area. but no trouble here, lovely neighbours. for 45k!!! now found a gem on old, but busy road, needs loads of tlc, but can do that slowly. hopefully we wont move again. 90K in the west midlands, towards staffordshire, dont really want to say exactly where!

Sorry for life story. but thats just how i bought and rented and bought etc. I didnt study, i wanted to but i chose a partner with two children who lived with us on off as their mother wasnt up to the job all the time, i took jobs that fitted around their school etc. I was 16 when we got together so did this from as soon as i left school. Have done homestudy along the way, but more for self than progression. Now deciding what to do long term, very lucky to be a sahm but would like more to life. This next place has a stupidly long garden so thinking about animal sanctury of some sort.

Anyway major tangent, sorry i made you so angry, really didnt mean to. Was just trying to say that people priorities their live for what they need at the time, with two kids (his) we needed a home more than anything else so thats what we went for. I assume you needed to study, that makes sence to me, im sorry if its coming out wrong, ill leave it now.

my gosh typo's, little ones crawling all over me!

Then it must be getting harder to get a house because my DH and I were told we had to have a credit history, impossible at 18 as you cannot get credit til 18. You were very lucky, BabyDubs, now at 18 you will be hard pressed to find somewhere to give you a loan or a mortgage, especially if you are in a minimum wage job. Also, you then end up spending such a lot of money on rent that it is hard to gather together a deposit.

Baby, don't you see though? You had someone else to pool money with, and somehow (like Seren, I don't know how!) the two of you were eligible for a loan.

That is not the case for most 18 year olds.

I don't doubt you worked bloody hard and made sacrifices, but I don't believe most 18 year olds could have done it.

Btw, please don't leave! I'm not cross with you, just frustrated and a bit curious how it was all possible.

Sorry, yes I get the two people thing, don't know why that didn't click, although only first two were joint, this place and new place will be just dh. Just realised that I do think of a mortgage as a joint thing, two able partners, god knows why though, hmm will challenge that thought!

Loan wAs with hasc, mortgages with northen rock btw, I'm 26 now, so 8 years ago! God I've don a lot sinc then.

As an aside, I can't actually get a mortgage now as i have bipolar so bad credit risk! I must have used up all my financial fortune!

so sorry, on iphone - im not good with it!

Gosh, I had no idea bipolar stopped people getting mortgages, that's really awful.

I should have thought of Northern Rock - they were pretty much willing to loan anything to anyone, weren't they?

Don't know if it stops everyone, but u have to put it down on the forms and was rejected by everyone my broker tried, can't get life insurance either oh well.

And yes northern rock were fab