to call DH an arse because he seems to think that 'polite well-spoken' boys are simply nerds?

[OrmRenewed]

All of our DC have been to local schools - both of which are in quite deprived areas, playgrounds full of the sort of mums that MN loves to hate . They have been free to bring home and befriend any child they want even though some of them did things that silently freaked me out (5yr old allowed to wander around the park along at 9 at night for example!). The secondary school that DS1 and DD are at is in the most deprived ward in Somerset and until recently has an appalling reputation but now very good.

I was talking to DH last night and saying how pleased I was that in the end DS1 always singled out the 'polite well-spoken boys' as friends, avoiding some of the hair-raising thugs that go to the same school. DH smirked and said 'you are such a snob! What you mean is he chooses the nerds'.

I was quite shocked that he should think that. Does a child have to be a bit of a rebel to avoid nerdiness. I'm a nerd - freely admit it - but wouldn't have said DS#1 was. I DH him an arse! He just smirked a bit more. Bastard

AIBU?

Oh thank god getorf and qod ! I was beginning to think I was married to a monster He's not but has thesw odd set ideas. But yes, he was definitely a rebel at school - maybe that's what he subconsciously respects.

heracles - I am unfailingly polite to any teenager I meet but I will admit to being vey glad that DS doesn't have short hair with weird designs shaved into it, doesn't wear sports clothes all the time, doesn't often say 'innit' and doesn't smoke.

It must be something to do with schooldays - DP was a rebel, had a punk haircut and probably threw chewing gum at the geeks. He is emphatically not like that now, so perhaps his geek remarks come from his inner 16 year old.

Yes your DH is a bit of an arse - Orm!

DH and I took DSS(9) and DS(2) to their cousin's 7th birthday. And we saw some boys act like little shits - for which I make no apology, they were pushing, shoving and in some cases punching the other children.
Now don't get me wrong DSS is no angel, but he was clearly shocked by the fact that these boys were behaving so appallingly and that their parents didn't seem to give a shit
At one point he was punched by one of the other boys, and he immediately came over to see his dad. Thankfully he was okay, but it made me & DH so glad that generally he is well behaved, never starts fights and would rather play with other boys like him. And yes he is a nerd - but so flipping what? Me and DH were both nerds at school and we both have good jobs - it is the nerds who will eventually go on to get the good jobs

I seem to spend my life encouraging mine to be nerds then

Just had to add my vote YANBU definately NOT!

YANBU!! I hope my DS is going to befriend these so called 'nerds' too. My brothers are polite etc, yes one of them is a science 'nerd' but in every other sense of the word, he is a very normal student and not 'nerdy' at all. Much rather have nice polite children around as oppose to horrors who don't even know the meaning of the word please etc.

Your DH is an arse!